Petarded Quotes

Petarded is a TV program that was first aired in 1970 . Petarded stopped airing in 1970.

Petarded Quotes

• (Unnamed) "Oh, God. What have I done? I'm the worst husband ever."
• (Agent Jessup) "Make that the worst father ever. Hi, I'm Agent Jessup form child services. I'm here to take your kids away."
• (Unnamed) "What? Why?"
• (Agent Jessup) "Because you're mentally unfit to take care of them."
• (Unnamed) "No way."
• (Unnamed) "Oh, my God."
• (Unnamed) "Finally."

• (Unnamed) "Cloris Leachman, I've bought you legally. Now juggle these bean bags."
• (Unnamed) "I don't know how to juggle --"
• (Unnamed) "GOD HELP YOU, CLORIS. JUGGLE THE BEAN BAGS."

• (Unnamed) "You ever stop and think "Wow, I'm married to that guy"?"
• (Unnamed) "Yeah, but I usually just suppress it."
• (Unnamed) "Is that healthy?"
• (Unnamed) "What's the worst that could happen?"
• (Unnamed) "I'm a tumor, I'm a tumor, I'm a tumor. I'm a tumor, I'm a tumor, I'm a tumor, I'm a tumor, I'm a tumor, I'm a tumor, oh-oh, I'm a tumor."

• (Unnamed) "Attention restaurant customers. Testicles. That is all."

• (Unnamed) "I can't believe this is happening to me. I can never go back to school again."
• (Unnamed) "Oh, yes, Meg. Yes-yes-yes, everything was going swimmingly for you until this. Yes, yes, THIS is the thing that will ruin your reputation, not you years of grotesque appearance or awkward social graces, or that Felix Unger-ish way you clear your sinuses. No, no, it's THIS. Do you hear yourself talk? I might kill you tonight."

• (Unnamed) "Chris, whatever happened to Geena Davis? She used to be in movies, but she's not in movies anymore. She's attractive enough but when she smiles you see too much gum. Not a good tooth-to-gum ratio -- Chris? Ah, I'll tell you in the morning."

• (Unnamed) "For whistling at a white woman, go directly to jail. Aw, man. Doesn't anyone ever win at this game?"
• (Unnamed) "You don't win. You just do a little better this time."

• (Unnamed) "My dad's smarter than your dad."
• (Unnamed) "We have the same dad, idiot."
• (Unnamed) "Yeah, but mine's smarter."

• (Unnamed) "You know, Peter, I hate to say "I told you so" about not being a genius, but -- EEEYEAH. IN YOUR f***ING FACE, f***WAD --. I'm -- I'm sorry about that."

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