Poetry and Quotations

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Funny Halloween Quotes

Halloween is the one night a year when girls can dress like a total slut and no other girls can say anything about it.
Lindsay Lohan, Mean Girls

There is nothing funny about Halloween. This sarcastic festival reflects, rather, an infernal demand for revenge by children on the adult world.
Jean Baudrillard

Charlie Brown is the one person I identify with. C.B. is such a loser. He wasn't even the star of his own Halloween special.
Chris Rock

I'll bet living in a nudist colony takes all the fun out of Halloween.
Charles Swartz

Ghosts, like ladies, never speak till spoke to.
Richard Harris Barharn

On Halloween, the parents sent their kids out looking like me.
Rodney Dangerfield

This Halloween the most popular mask is the Arnold Schwarzenegger mask. And the best part? With a mouth full of candy you will sound just like him.
Conan O'Brien

A grandmother pretends she doesn't know who you are on Halloween.
Erma Bombeck

Eye of newt, and toe of frog, Wool of bat, and tongue of dog, Adder's fork, and blind-worm's sting, Lizard's leg, and owlet's wing, For a charm of powerful trouble, Like a hell-broth boil and bubble.
William Shakespeare

I see my face in the mirror and go, 'I'm a Halloween costume? That's what they think of me?
Drew Carey

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More Halloween quotes

Humorous Halloween quotes

More holiday quotes

Christmas
Easter
Fathers Day
Independence Day
Labor Day
Mother's Day
New Years
Thanksgiving
Valentine's Day

Related pages
Halloween eCards
Halloween poems