Tropic Thunder Quotes

Tropic Thunder is a television show that was first aired in 1970 . Tropic Thunder ended its run in 1970.

It features Plainlist, Stuart Cornfeld, and Eric McLeod as producer, Theodore Shapiro in charge of musical score, and John Toll as head of cinematography.

Tropic Thunder is recorded in English and originally aired in United States. Each episode of Tropic Thunder is 107 minutes long. Tropic Thunder is distributed by DreamWorks Pictures.

The cast includes: Robert Downey Jr. as Kirk Lazarus, Tom Cruise as Les Grossman, Ben Stiller as Tugg Speedman, Bill Hader as Studio Executive Rob Slolom, Danny McBride as Cody, Nick Nolte as Four Leaf Tayback, Matthew McConaughey as Rick Peck, Reggie Lee as Byong, and Steve Coogan as Damien Cockburn.

Tropic Thunder Quotes

Robert Downey Jr. as Kirk Lazarus

• (Robert Downey Jr.) "I know who I am. I'm the dude playin' the dude, disguised as another dude."

• (Robert Downey Jr.) "He ain't acting like God. He being judged by him."

• (Robert Downey Jr.) "Cover me."
• (Kevin Sandusky) "How do we cover him?"

• (Robert Downey Jr.) "Man that's beauty. Nights like tonight make a man wonder what it's all about."

• (Robert Downey Jr.) "You more shredded than a Julienne salad, man."

• (Robert Downey Jr.) "Hey asshole. This motherf***er's dead. Ain't no Chriss Angel Mindfreak David Blaine Trapdoor s*** jumping off here"
• (Ben Stiller) "Hey, You wanna get in line or do you want blow another take."
• (Robert Downey Jr.) "Ain't no takes. Ain't no god**** motion picture"
• (Ben Stiller) "Are you sure?"
• (Robert Downey Jr.) "Oh yeah"

• (Robert Downey Jr.) "I don't read the script. The script reads me."

• (Robert Downey Jr.) "I don't break charachter until I do the DVD commentary."

• (Robert Downey Jr.) "Here's my motherf***in' farm."

• (Robert Downey Jr.) "Alpa and I are already wearin' Earth Mamma's natural night camo."
• (Alpa Chino) "Cool it, Benson."

• (Robert Downey Jr.) "Hey, man. One week down, two weeks behind, G.I. Joe can't cry, but it don't matter 'cause you didn't have the camera turned on anyway. Let's party."

• (Robert Downey Jr.) "You gonna focus up now, motherf***er and say it. "It's me, Tugg.""
• (Ben Stiller) "It's Me Tugg."
• (Robert Downey Jr.) "That's right. Now, Tugg who?"
• (Ben Stiller) "Tugg who? I don't know. Who are you?"
• (Robert Downey Jr.) "Me? I know who I am. I'm a dude playing a dude disguised as another dude."
• (Kevin Sandusky) "What?"
• (Robert Downey Jr.) "You a dude that don't know what dude he is."
• (Ben Stiller) "Or are you a dude who has no idea what dude he is and claims to know what dude he is --"
• (Jeff Portnoy) "What the f*** are you guys talking about?"
• (Ben Stiller) "-- by playing other dudes."
• (Robert Downey Jr.) "I know what dude I am."
• (Ben Stiller) "You're scared."
• (Robert Downey Jr.) "I ain't scared. Scared of what?"
• (Ben Stiller) "Or scared of who?"
• (Robert Downey Jr.) "Scared of who."
• (Kevin Sandusky) "Come on guys. We really need to go."
• (Ben Stiller) "Scared of you."

• (Alpa Chino) "Yeah -- but those dudes was trained soldiers."
• (Robert Downey Jr.) "Yeah. And we trained actors, mothaf***a. Time to man up. And I ain't gonna sugarcoat. Some of us might not even make it back."
• (Jeff Portnoy) "What do you mean? Like, not on the same flight?"

• (Robert Downey Jr.) "Yo asshole, this muthaf***a's dead ain't no Chris Angel Mind Freak, David Blaine trap door, horses*** jumpin' off here."
• (Ben Stiller) "Hey, you wanna get on the train here or you wanna ruin another take, huh?"
• (Robert Downey Jr.) "Ain't no god**** takes, ain't no god**** motion picture."
• (Ben Stiller) "Are you sure?"
• (Robert Downey Jr.) "Oh yea."
• (Ben Stiller) "Yeah?"
• (Robert Downey Jr.) "For certain man."
• (Ben Stiller) "Then why are you still in character? Hm?"
• (Robert Downey Jr.) "I know but I don't have to tell you --"
• (Ben Stiller) "You don't know."
• (Robert Downey Jr.) "Man, I don't drop character 'till I done the DVD commentary."

• (Robert Downey Jr.) "Being an actor's no different than being a rugby player or construction worker, save for the fact that my tools are the mechanisms which trigger human emotion."

• (Robert Downey Jr.) "Cover me, limp dick f***-ups."

• (Robert Downey Jr.) "Being an actor's no different than being a rugby player or a construction worker, save for the fact that my tools are the mechanisms that trigger human emotion."

• (Robert Downey Jr.) "What do you mean, "you people?""
• (Alpa Chino) "What do you mean, "you people?""
• (Robert Downey Jr.) "Huh?"

• (Jeff Portnoy) "I need to bite its hide -- and wear its stomach like a unitard."
• (Robert Downey Jr.) "Ain't nobody doing nothing to no one or body. Now, Mr. Portnoy is feeling a little flu-ish, don't wanna walk, put him up on that cloven-hoof animal."

• (Robert Downey Jr.) "Action Jackson can't cry, that's what's going down."
• (Ben Stiller) "You know what Kirk, I'm ready to do the scene."
• (Robert Downey Jr.) "What scene? The scene is about emotionality. Where is it? Now it's time to flip the script. We'll get to Chinese New Year waitin' for my man to cry."

• (Robert Downey Jr.) "Same thing happened to me when I played Neil Armstrong in Moonshot. They found me in an alley in Burbank trying to re-enter the earth's atmosphere in an old refrigerator box."

• (Robert Downey Jr.) "I know who I am. I'm a dude playing a dude disgused as another dude."
• (Kevin Sandusky) "What?"
• (Robert Downey Jr.) "You're a dude that don't know what dude he is."
• (Ben Stiller) "Or are you a dude who has no idea what dude he is and claims to know what dude he is --"
• (Jeff Portnoy) "What the f*** are you guys talking about?"
• (Ben Stiller) "by playing other dudes?"

• (Unnamed) "In a time where to be different was to be condemned --"
• (Unnamed) "-- and to be condemned was to die, one man chose to question his God."
• (Unnamed) "From Fox Searchlight, five-time Academy Award winner Kirk Lazarus and MTV Movie Award Best Kiss winner Tobey Maguire. Winner of the Beijing Film Festival's coveted Crying Monkey Award, "Satan's Alley"."
• (Robert Downey Jr.) "I've been a bad, bad boy, Father."

• (Robert Downey Jr.) "We're tired of being your trail donkeys. Wandering around the jungle like you some kinda one man GPS. We lost man. We f***ing lost."
• (Robert Downey Jr.) "Tell him McKlutsky. Tell him what time it is."

• (Alpa Chino) "No, I always wanted to. I guess I just never had the courage to ask. It's complicated."
• (Robert Downey Jr.) "Nah. It's simple as pie man: you plant your feet on the ground, you look her square in the eyes you say "Hey. baby, you and me's goin' on a date, that's the end of the story". What's her name?"
• (Alpa Chino) "-- Lance"
• (Robert Downey Jr.) "You say 'Listen here, Lance' -- Lance? What the f*** did I just hear? Lance?"
• (Kevin Sandusky) "Did you just say Lance?"
• (Alpa Chino) "No. I said Nance. That's what I said, Nance."
• (Kevin Sandusky) "It sounded like Lance."
• (Alpa Chino) "Dammit, I'm Alpa Chino. 'I Love Tha p*****', aight? Lay yo ass back down and look at the stars."
• (Robert Downey Jr.) "When you wrote 'I Love Tha p*****', was you thinking about danglin your dice on Lance's forehead?"

• (Robert Downey Jr.) "Let's make lemonade."

• (Robert Downey Jr.) "I'm just like a little boy, playin' with his dick when he's nervous."

• (Jeff Portnoy) "So, what's the plan, man? You gonna talk Vietnamese to those dudes?"
• (Robert Downey Jr.) "No, no. Mandarin Chinese. What I can tell, it's what they're speaking down there."
• (Jeff Portnoy) "How the hell do you know Chinese?"
• (Robert Downey Jr.) "Land of Silk and Money with Gong Li. Second Globe, third Oscar. I prepped for that one by working in a Beijing textile factory for eight months."

• (Kevin Sandusky) "Alpa, do you have any Booty Sweat?"
• (Robert Downey Jr.) "Yeah, get him chugging on some of Alpa's ass water. That'll bring him around. It's a cure-all. Man, what you coming out in movies for anyway? Did you need another revenue stream?"
• (Alpa Chino) "For your information, my revenue stream currently generates U$2 million a year in charitable contributions for my community."
• (Robert Downey Jr.) "Hot damn."

• (Kevin Sandusky) "There's no way we make it over that ridge before sundown."
• (Robert Downey Jr.) "All right fellas, we're gonna make camp, rest up. Y'all might be in for a treat. You know back before the war broke out I was a saucier in San Antone. I bet I could collar up some of them greens, yeah, some crawfish out the paddy, yo'. Ha. I'm makin' some crabapples for dessert now, yo. Hell yeah, ha."
• (Alpa Chino) "Hell yeah. Ha. That's how we all talk? We all talk like dis, "suh"? Yes suh, ha. Yeah mmm-hmm get some crawfish, and some ribs, ha. Ye-aah. You're Australian. Be Australian. Excuse me, Kangaroo Jack."
• (Robert Downey Jr.) "I get excited about my foods, man."

• (Robert Downey Jr.) "Yo asshole. This muthaf***a's dead. Ain't no Chris Angel Mindfreak, David Blane trapdoor horse s*** jumpin' off here."

• (Robert Downey Jr.) "Suck my unit."

• (Robert Downey Jr.) "And the Oscar goes to. Yes. Tugg Speedman for "Tropic Blunder: The True Story Behind The Making Of The Most Expensive Fake True War Movie Ever""

• (Alpa Chino) "Told you I'd tag you back."
• (Robert Downey Jr.) "Can I tell you I'm sorry for any offense I might've caused, man? I just got caught up in bein' --"
• (Alpa Chino) "In bein' a dumbass?"
• (Robert Downey Jr.) "I guess so."
• (Alpa Chino) "Why you still doin' the chicken-George s***? I have no idea."
• (Robert Downey Jr.) "Neither do I."
• (Alpa Chino) "It's beyond me."
• (Robert Downey Jr.) "It's beyond me."
• (Alpa Chino) "You confused."
• (Robert Downey Jr.) "I am a little confused."
• (Alpa Chino) "I know."
• (Robert Downey Jr.) "But are we cool?"
• (Alpa Chino) "Not really."

• (Alpa Chino) "And why am I in this movie? Maybe I just knew I had to represent, because they had one good part in it for a black man and they gave it to Crocodile Dundee."
• (Robert Downey Jr.) "Pump your brakes, kid. That man is a national treasure."
• (Alpa Chino) "I just wanted to throw another shrimp on your Barbie."
• (Robert Downey Jr.) "That s*** ain't funny."
• (Kevin Sandusky) "Hey, fellas. It's hot. We're tired. It stinks."
• (Alpa Chino) "I'm just f***ing with you, Kangaroo Jack. I'm sorry a dingo ate your baby."
• (Robert Downey Jr.) "You know that's a true story? Lady lost her kid."

• (Robert Downey Jr.) "Man, I don't drop character 'till I done the DVD commentary."

• (Robert Downey Jr.) "Stop tailgatin' me, ya pasty teabag. I'm goin' potty. Wanna hold my dick?"

• (Tran - Flaming Dragon Compound) "Where is your farm --"
• (Tran - Flaming Dragon Compound) "-- AMERICAN?"
• (Robert Downey Jr.) "My farm? Here's my mothaf***in' farm."
• (Robert Downey Jr.) "Kwan lo. I'm a lead farmer."

• (Alpa Chino) "I had to represent. Cause they had one good role for a black man, and they gave it to Crocodile Dundee."
• (Robert Downey Jr.) "Pump your brakes, kid, that man's a national treasure."

• (Robert Downey Jr.) "How's it goin' with that map, Chief?"
• (Ben Stiller) "Huh?"
• (Robert Downey Jr.) "Can I have a look at it?"
• (Ben Stiller) "I got it. Yeah. Damien gave it to me, remember?"
• (Robert Downey Jr.) "Yeah, but he gave it to you for us."
• (Ben Stiller) "Uh-Huh. Yeah."
• (Robert Downey Jr.) "Okay."
• (Ben Stiller) "I got it."
• (Robert Downey Jr.) "You got it upside down."
• (Ben Stiller) "Thank you."
• (Robert Downey Jr.) "Letters go one way and the numbers another. I'm just. Dude, I'm tryin'. I got your back man."
• (Ben Stiller) "Well I-I'm cool, alright?"
• (Robert Downey Jr.) "You are cool?"
• (Ben Stiller) "Yeah, but --"
• (Robert Downey Jr.) "Is your character dyslectic?"
• (Ben Stiller) "No, the character is not dyslec --"
• (Robert Downey Jr.) "So you a cartographer."

• (Robert Downey Jr.) "Hey, man, you know how in Rambo I, he was big but a little puffy, and then Rambo II, he got all shredded up?"
• (Ben Stiller) "Yeah."
• (Robert Downey Jr.) "That's kind of how you look right now."
• (Ben Stiller) "Yeah?"
• (Robert Downey Jr.) "Not Rambo I but II."
• (Ben Stiller) "Really?"
• (Robert Downey Jr.) "Yeah, when he was cut up."
• (Ben Stiller) "I'm not that -- I mean, that's what I'm going for, but you know --"
• (Robert Downey Jr.) "Come on, dude. You more shredded than a julienne salad, man."
• (Ben Stiller) "Thanks."
• (Robert Downey Jr.) "What's the secret, dude?"
• (Ben Stiller) "It's a diet. I'm just dieting."
• (Robert Downey Jr.) "Really? Cause I'm trying to come up a little, but it's just -- It's tough."
• (Ben Stiller) "You look good."
• (Robert Downey Jr.) "Any tips?"
• (Ben Stiller) "What?"
• (Robert Downey Jr.) "Any tips, you got?"
• (Ben Stiller) "There's, like, the pineapple --"
• (Robert Downey Jr.) "Give me that god**** map."
• (Robert Downey Jr.) "f*** you."
• (Ben Stiller) "Hey."
• (Robert Downey Jr.) "Hey."

• (Robert Downey Jr.) "I've been a bad boy, father."

Tom Cruise as Les Grossman

• (Tom Cruise) "What you gotta do is pull down their pants and spank their ass, you spank it."
• (Bill Hader) "You spank that ass Les."

• (Tom Cruise) "Which one of you f***faces is Damien Cockburn?"
• (Steve Coogan) "Uh, that's me, sir. It's an honor to finally meet you. Get some face time."
• (Tom Cruise) "And who here is the key grip?"
• (Tom Cruise) "You? You. Hit that director in the face, really f***ing hard."
• (Unnamed) "Sorry, man."
• (Tom Cruise) "This is all your fault, you limey f***."

• (Tom Cruise) "Look f***-stick, I'm incredibly busy, so why don't you get the hell out of here before I snap your dick off and jam it into your ass."
• (Tom Cruise) "No, not you Helen, but I will rip your tits off if you don't get me those theatres."

• (Tom Cruise) "Now I want you to take a step back -- and literally f*** your own face."

• (Tom Cruise) "First, take a big step back -- and literally, f*** YOUR OWN FACE. I don't know what kind of pan-pacific bulls*** power play you're trying to pull here, but Asia Jack is my territory. So whatever you're thinking, you'd better think again. Otherwise I'm gonna have to head down there and I will rain down an un-Godly f***ing firestorm upon you. You're gonna have to call the f***ing United Nations and get a f***ing binding resolution to keep me from f***ing destroying you. I'm talking scorched earth, motherf***er. I will massacre you. I WILL f*** YOU UP."

• (Tom Cruise) "Speedman is a dying star. A white dwarf headed for a black hole. That's physics. It's inevitable."
• (Bill Hader) "We've been handed an incredible opportunity here, Peck."
• (Tom Cruise) "The universe -- is talking to us right now. You just gotta listen."
• (Tom Cruise) "See, this is the good part, Pecker. This is when the job gets fun. Ask -- and you shall receive."
• (Bill Hader) "Right --"
• (Tom Cruise) "You play ball -- we play ball. I knoowwww -- you want the goodies."
• (Bill Hader) "Welcome to the goodie room."
• (Tom Cruise) "You paying attention? I'm talking -- G5, Pecker. That's how you can roll. No more frequent flyer bitch miles for my boy. Oh yeah. Playa -- playa. Big dick playa."
• (Bill Hader) "Swinging past ya knees."
• (Tom Cruise) "Big dick, baby."
• (Bill Hader) "Yep."
• (Tom Cruise) "Or -- you can grow a conscience in the next five minutes and see where that takes you."
• (Matthew McConaughey) "Let me get this straight. You want me to let my client of 15 years, one of my best friends, die in the jungle alone, for some money and a G5?"
• (Tom Cruise) "Yes."
• (Matthew McConaughey) "A G5 airplane?"
• (Tom Cruise) "Yes -- and lots of money -- playaaaa."

• (Tom Cruise) "We don't negotiate with terrorists."

• (Tom Cruise) "Let's face it, the kids aren't exactly dressing up as The Scorcher for Purim anymore."

• (Tom Cruise) "I will f***ing massacre you."

• (Tom Cruise) "What do you need, Peck?"
• (Matthew McConaughey) "What do YOU need, Les? Glasses?"
• (Tom Cruise) "-- What?"

• (Tom Cruise) "Look, f***stick, I'm incredibly busy. So why don't you get the hell out of here before I snap your dick off and jam it into your ass --"

• (Tom Cruise) "f*** the jungle."

Ben Stiller as Tugg Speedman

• (Ben Stiller) "A little twig-man oscar. I'm going to call you half-squat, and you can call me -- papa"

• (Ben Stiller) "You make my pee-pee maker t-t-tingle."

• (Ben Stiller) "I killed one, Rick -- the thing I love most in the world."
• (Matthew McConaughey) "A hooker. Alright, you killed a hooker. Calm down. Here's what you're gonna do: Get your hands on some bleach, some hydrogen peroxide, and a s*** load of lime."

• (Ben Stiller) "My son gave this to me."
• (Robert Downey Jr.) "That's your stick buddy?"
• (Ben Stiller) "His name is Twiggman."
• (Robert Downey Jr.) "Does he want to come with us?"

• (Kevin Sandusky) "Tugg. Tugger. You're the last piece of the puzzle buddy. We need you. Your men need you. Are you with us?"
• (Ben Stiller) "I'm a rooster illusion."
• (Kevin Sandusky) "f*** it. We'll deal with him later."

• (Ben Stiller) "The dudes are emerging --"
• (Robert Downey Jr.) "He's right, you know? I'm NOT Sergeant Lincoln Osiris --"
• (Robert Downey Jr.) "-- nor am I Father O'Mallie --"
• (Robert Downey Jr.) "-- or Neil Armstrong --"
• (Robert Downey Jr.) "I -- I think I might be nobody."
• (Kevin Sandusky) "Wow. The insecurity level with you guys is ridiculous."

• (Ben Stiller) "Look, Kirk, no offense. I know you're the big, fancy actor here, but I've done a lot more effect-driven films than you have and I think I can spot --"
• (Ben Stiller) "a prop head when I see one."
• (Ben Stiller) "It's corn syrup, guys. Corn syrup and latex."
• (Ben Stiller) "Warm -- blood-flavored corn syrup."

• (Ben Stiller) "Tell the world what happened here."
• (Robert Downey Jr.) "What happened here?"

• (Ben Stiller) "Goodbye mama, now you can have ice cream in heavan. I'll see you again tonight when I go to bed in my head movies. But this head movie makes my eyes rain."

• (Ben Stiller) "Now, let's go get those Viet Congs."
• (Alpa Chino) ""Viet Cong.""
• (Ben Stiller) "What?"
• (Alpa Chino) "It's "viet cong." There's no "s," it's already plural. You wouldn't say "Chineses -- ""

• (Ben Stiller) "You tell the world what happened here."
• (Robert Downey Jr.) "What happened here?"
• (Ben Stiller) "I don't know, but you need to tell them."
• (Jeff Portnoy) "Where is he going? We're gonna f***ing die."
• (Nick Nolte) "Laz, come on. He joined the circus. Let's go."
• (Robert Downey Jr.) "You've got hands? f***, you've got hands?"

• (Tyra Banks) "You have no real family, you're on the wrong side of 40, you're childless and alone. Somebody close to you said: "One more flop, and it's over.""
• (Ben Stiller) "Somebody said they were close to me?"

• (Ben Stiller) "That's the trailer right there."

• (Ben Stiller) "I have a son now. Little Half Squat."
• (Robert Downey Jr.) "Who in crikey f*** is Half Squat?"

• (Ben Stiller) "I have a son now. Little Half-Squat"
• (Robert Downey Jr.) "Who in crikey f*** is "Half-Squat"?"

• (Ben Stiller) "This is insane. Are you really going to abandon this movie? We're supposed to be a unit."
• (Robert Downey Jr.) "Suck my unit."

Danny McBride as Cody

• (Danny McBride) "Oh my God. I'm going into catering after this."

• (Danny McBride) "Dude, dude, what the hell is going on here? Where are we?"
• (Nick Nolte) "I have no idea, I've never been outside the states."
• (Danny McBride) "Wait what? Are you f***ing kidding me? Did you make this whole god**** thing up? Dude you weren't even in the f***ing service?"
• (Nick Nolte) "Yes. Of course. Coast Guard."
• (Danny McBride) "Coast Guard."
• (Nick Nolte) "Sanitation Department."
• (Danny McBride) "Oh my god. You're a f***ing garbage man. Dammit. F.L. Tayback lies to me and the whole U.S. of A.."
• (Nick Nolte) "I wrote the book as a tribute. I'm a patriot."
• (Danny McBride) "Yeah, you're the Milli Vanilli of patriots, okay? You lied about fighting in the Vietnam War. It's like; it's like punching the American Flag in the face goddammit. God, to think I believed you."
• (Nick Nolte) "Writers lie all the time."
• (Danny McBride) "Can I be tied to another post please?"

• (Danny McBride) "Damian, what's the dealie dude? Are we gonna blow up this tree line or what? Tuk-Tuk and Kim got the blue balls and I wanna let em squirt it for a go -- Peter, can he hear me?"
• (Danny McBride) "That's C-4, dips***. Put that back. I said a detonator. I need some dudes who speak American god dammit. He's making a f***ing sweater here, I'm tryin' to put Tiger Balm on this jungle's nuts."

• (Danny McBride) "Big ass titties."

• (Alpa Chino) "What're you guys doing here?"
• (Danny McBride) "He has hands."
• (Nick Nolte) "He killed Damien."
• (Danny McBride) "Bulls***."
• (Nick Nolte) "He blinded Jamie Lee Curtis."
• (Danny McBride) "Almost."
• (Alpa Chino) "What're you talking about? Damien stepped on an old land mine."
• (Danny McBride) "Oh, sweet, thank God."

• (Danny McBride) "I don't know what it's called; I only know the sound it makes when it lies."

• (Danny McBride) "Look, man, I almost blinded Jamie Lee Curtis in "Freaky Friday." This s*** will ruin me, man."

• (Danny McBride) "Just say no to this, you drug-making midget."
• (Danny McBride) "Oh my God. I am moving to catering after this."

Bill Hader as Studio Executive Rob Slolom

• (Bill Hader) "Wow. 8 Oscars, 400 million dollars, and you saved Tugg Speedman's career."
• (Tom Cruise) "I couldn't have done it without you."
• (Bill Hader) "Really?"
• (Tom Cruise) "No, dickhead. Of course I could. A nutless monkey could do your job. Now, go get drunk and take credit at all the parties."
• (Bill Hader) "I wouldn't do that."
• (Tom Cruise) "Ah -- joking."
• (Bill Hader) "Ah, there he is. Funny. You're a funny guy."
• (Tom Cruise) "Yeah. But seriously, a nutless monkey could do your job."

• (Bill Hader) "It's Les Grossman. He throws these words around. "Crisis", "explosion", "not rolling", "fired". These are just words."

Matthew McConaughey as Rick Peck

• (Matthew McConaughey) "You can't be serious?"
• (Tom Cruise) "You kick in the door to my house all ants in your pants, sucking my left nut to get a TiVo scrap for the 3rd runner-up "sexiest man alive" 1998 -- And you're asking if I'm SERIOUS?"

• (Matthew McConaughey) "Yo Tuggernuts. It's the Pecker."

• (Matthew McConaughey) "I got the TiVo."

• (Matthew McConaughey) "How's the adoption thing going?"
• (Ben Stiller) "Not good."
• (Matthew McConaughey) "At least you get to choose yours. I'm stuck with mine."

Nick Nolte as Four Leaf Tayback

• (Nick Nolte) "In the Winter of 1969, an elite force of the US Army was sent on a top secret assignment in Southeast Vietnam. The objective: rescue Sgt. Four Leaf Tayback from a heavily guarded NVA Prison Camp. The mission was considered to be near-suicide. Of the ten men sent, four returned. Of those four, three wrote books about what happened. Of those three, two were published. And of those two, only one got a movie deal. This is the story of the men who attempted to make that movie."

Steve Coogan as Damien Cockburn

(We don't have any quotes for this character)

Reggie Lee as Byong

• (Reggie Lee) "We no get money yet. Price now 100 million. You pay now, or tomorrow Simple Jack Die."
• (Tom Cruise) "Great. Let me get this down. 100 million -- Oh, wait. I got a better idea. Instead of a hundred million, how about I send you a hobo's dick cheese? Then, you kill him. Do your thing, skin the f***ing bastard. Go to town, man. Go to town. In the mean time and as usual, go f*** yourself."

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