The Flaming Spittoon Acquisition Quotes

The Flaming Spittoon Acquisition is a television show that first aired in 1970 . The Flaming Spittoon Acquisition completed its run in 1970.

(Unnamed) "Leonard, what's the deal with Sheldon's friend Amy? Are they a couple?"
(Unnamed) "A couple of weirdos. Why?"

(Unnamed) "So, other than you taking your relationship to the next level with another guy, this was nice."
(Unnamed) "Yes, well, thanks for seeing me to my door."
(Unnamed) "Oh, you're welcome."
(Unnamed) "Amy. Amy. Amy. Let's wrap things up out there."
(Unnamed) "Umm -- Good night Stuart."
(Unnamed) "Good night."
(Unnamed) "Take a hint Stuart, the lady said good night."

(Unnamed) "Alright, honey, let me tell you a story. There was a guy I liked, and I never told him how I felt. Eventually he started going out with someone else, and I always regretted it. Do you see where I'm going with this?"
(Unnamed) "I believe I do."
(Unnamed) "Mhm."
(Unnamed) "I'm the guy."
(Unnamed) "You're not the guy."
(Unnamed) "Are you sure? That would explain so much. Your constant presence in my apartment, the baffling dalliance with Leonard just to be near me, the way you call me sweetie all the time --"
(Unnamed) "I call everyone sweetie."
(Unnamed) "You tramp."

(Unnamed) "Look, Sheldon, all I'm saying is -- strap on a pair and go talk to Amy."
(Unnamed) "Strap on a pair? Uh, of what? Skates?"
(Unnamed) "Oh, sweetie, you're so not the guy."

(Unnamed) "So, what do you think of new comic book night? Magic, right?"
(Unnamed) "Sheldon, I'm disappointed in you. Sure, a genius such as yourself is allowed his vices. I can understand frequenting an opium den or hunting your fellow men for sport, but this? Lame-o."
(Unnamed) "A. comic books are storytelling through the use of sequential art, a medium that has existed for 17,000 years back to the cave art of Lascaux; and B. you play the harp, like that's cool."

(Unnamed) "I believe I would like to alter the paradigm of our relationship."
(Unnamed) "I'm listening."
(Unnamed) "With the understanding that nothing changes, whatsoever. Physical or otherwise. I would not object to us no longer characterizing you as not my girlfriend."
(Unnamed) "Interesting. Now, try it without the quadruple negative."
(Unnamed) "You're being impossible."
(Unnamed) "Hi, Stuart."
(Unnamed) "Fine."
(Unnamed) "Amy -- Will you be my girlfriend?"
(Unnamed) "Yes."
(Unnamed) "Well, that's enough of that."

(Unnamed) "You know, it's amazing people keep coming to comic book stores instead of just downloading the comics digitally."
(Unnamed) "It's probably for the best. For a lot of these guys, the weekly trip here is the only chance their mom has to go down to the basement and change their sheets."
(Unnamed) "Oh, that reminds me, I get fresh sheets tonight, yay."

(Unnamed) "I thought you didn't like Facebook anymore."
(Unnamed) "Don't be silly. I'm a fan of anything that tries to replaces actual human contact."

(Unnamed) "Sheldon, what are you doing here?"
(Unnamed) "The thought of you sitting in a darkened theater with a character like Stuart is repellent. No offence Stuart."
(Unnamed) "None taken. Though repellent's kind of a, kind of a strong word."

(Unnamed) "I know what this is about. Given the professional standstill you're at, you're wondering if this is the appropriate time to abandon your research and focus on teaching. Yes. And if I may suggest, consider changing discipline, to the humanities or perhaps history. One of the advantages of teaching history is that you don't have to create things, you know, you just have to remember stuffs that happened and then parrot it back. You can have fun with that."

(Unnamed) "Need help finding anything you like?"
(Unnamed) "Yeah, a comic book without a woman whose bosom could be used as a flotation device."
(Unnamed) "Sorry, people who come here like big boobs. Some of them have big boobs."

(Unnamed) "I got a splinter."
(Unnamed) "What do you want me to do about it?"
(Unnamed) "Relationship Agreement Section 4: Boo-Boos and Ouchies. You have to take care of it."

(Unnamed) "Are you telling me that Sheldon's patented combination of condescension and no sex isn't enough to hold onto a woman?"

(Unnamed) "Oh god, are you trying to make Amy jealous?"
(Unnamed) "No. Why is everyone so obsessed with Amy and Stuart, and whether or not they may be having more pumpkin lattes or intercourse tonight?"
(Unnamed) "Ok, listen to me, playing games is not gonna help get Amy back."
(Unnamed) "I'm not trying to get her back. But out of curiosity, what is a way?"

(Unnamed) "Stuart, help us settle an argument. Who would win in a fight, Billy the Kid or the White Wizard?"
(Unnamed) "I could tell you, but then I would be depriving you of the joy of finding out yourselves at the magical, rootin'-tootin' low price of $24.99."
(Unnamed) "I'll buy one."
(Unnamed) "Make that two."
(Unnamed) "I hate you both and myself. Make it three."
(Unnamed) "Like shooting nerds in a barrel."

(Unnamed) "How did you get into my apartment?"
(Unnamed) "Is this the kind of nagging I'm going to expect now that you're my girlfriend?"

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