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Deadpool 2 Quotes

Deadpool 2 is a TV program that debuted in 1970 . Deadpool 2 ended its run in 1970.

It features Simon Kinberg; Ryan Reynolds; Lauren Shuler Donner as producer, Tyler Bates in charge of musical score, and Jonathan Sela as head of cinematography.

Deadpool 2 is recorded in English and originally aired in United States. Each episode of Deadpool 2 is 119 minutes long. Deadpool 2 is distributed by 20th Century Fox.

The cast includes: Ryan Reynolds as Deadpool, Josh Brolin as Cable, T.J. Miller as Weasel, Jack Kesy as Black Tom, Zazie Beetz as Domino, and Brianna Hildebrand as Negasonic Teenage Warhead.

Deadpool 2 Quotes

Ryan Reynolds as Deadpool

  • (Ryan Reynolds) "Gimme your best shot, One-Eyed Willie."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "-- Ow."
  • (Dopinder) "I want to fill my soul. I want to belong to something, like you, Pool sir."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "Dopinder, you never cease to surprise me. You know, the depth of your heart is extraordinary. We all need a sense of belonging. We all need a genuine sense of home, a place --"
  • (Dopinder) "I want to become a contract killer."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "I'm sorry, what did you say?"
  • (Dopinder) "Remember when I kidnapped Bandhu and threatened him with great violence?"
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "Yeah, you kinda killed him."
  • (Dopinder) "And remember the movie "Interview with the Vampire?""
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "Don't want to."
  • (Dopinder) "When Tom Cruise fed 10-year-old Kirsten Dunst blood for the first time. And she looked up at his smooth, handsome face and said "I want some more." Oh, Pool, picture me, a 10-year-old Kirsten Dunst."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "-- I'll never not picture that. But I can't wait to never speak of this, as soon as possible."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "Four or five moments. That's all it takes to be a hero. People think you wake up a hero, brush your teeth a hero, ejaculate into a soap dispenser a hero. But now, being a hero, it's only a few moments. Few moments doing the ugly stuff no one else will do."
  • (Fred Savage) "Gotta prefer Marvel movies."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "We are Marvel."
  • (Fred Savage) "Yeah, but you're, you know, Marvel licensed by Fox. It's kinda like if the Beatles were produced by Nickelback. It's music, but it sucks."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "You know what we need to do? We need to build a f***ing team. We need 'em tough, morally flexible, and young enough so they can carry this franchise 10-12 years."
  • (Dopinder) "My body is an instrument of death."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "Not now, Dopinder."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "Oh, well that's -- that's just the most -- beautiful thing that I've- I don't know what this is."
  • (Vanessa) "My IUD."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "-- A bomb?"
  • (Vanessa) "No, dip-for-brains, my birth control device."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "Zip it, Thanos."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "Any powers you wanna tell us about? Any, uh --"
  • (Peter) "No. I don't have one. Um, I just saw the ad. I thought it looked fun."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "-- You're in."
  • (Dopinder) "f***."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "You're in the big leagues now, kid."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "You're welcome, Canada."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "Oh my God. Juggernaut. I thought that was you. I should've worn my white pants."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "You know what? Doing the right thing is sometimes messy, and f***ed up, and not particularly convenient. So, stay here in Chateau de Virgin while we go get our f*** on."
  • (Juggernaut) "I'm gonna rip you in half now."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "That is such a Juggernaut thing to say."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "Juggernaut. I should've worn the white pants."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "He's teamed up with the Juggernaut. The Juggernaut. That's, like, my favorite Marvel character ever, but you should never meet your heroes, because honestly, he's a bit of a dick. And like a lot of dicks, he's as hard as a rock, and causes nothing but problems."
  • (Colossus) "We have rules. You are not judge, jury or executioner."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "f*** your rules. I fight for what's right, and sometimes you gotta fight dirty."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "Oh s***, that f***ing does it."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "Put your hands behind your knees and get down on your head now."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "I don't know how to thank you, but I do know how to hug you."
  • (Josh Brolin) "No."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "Yes. Here we go. Bring it in."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "Come on. Pelvis to pelvis. Let's go tip to tip. There we go, the kids call this docking."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "Is there a knife in my dick?"
  • (Josh Brolin) "There's a knife in your dick, yeah."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "I know what you're thinking: "I'm so glad I left the kiddos at home." But that's where you'd be wrong. That babysitter of yours is high as f*** right now. And believe it or not, Deadpool 2 is a family film. True story. And every big family film starts -- with a vicious murder. Bambi, The Lion King, Saw 7."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "You killed Black Tom, you racist son of a bitch."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "We're definitely naming our kid Cher."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "Hello, superpower."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "Can you see it? Do you see that beautiful bright light? There it is."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "Oh, that's the sun. Don't stare directly into that."
  • (Dopinder) "I want some more."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "I bet you do, Brown Panther."
  • (Juggernaut) "Now I'm gonna shove the red guy up the old guy."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "I believe him."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "Go home, Sugar Bear, go home."
  • (Firefist) "How do you know what I want?"
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "Because I've been inside you. That came out wrong. I've been inside your shoes, which is also off-putting."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "I don't speak Cantonese, Mr --"
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "Well, I'm not even going to attempt that. But I did take eighth grade Spanish, so donde esta la biblioteca? Which literally translates to: I don't bargain, pumpkin-f***er."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "Hey, big guy, the sun's getting real low."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "Well, I guess we found something you're not better at."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "f*** it. Superhero landing comin' up."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "Ooh. Ah, f***, f***, f***, f***, f***. That is so not practical."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "f*** Wolverine. First he rides my coattails with the R-rating, and then, that hairy motherf***er ups the ante by dying. What a dick. Well, guess what, Wolvie? I'm dying in this one, too."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "Boy, howdy. Hi. This is a toughie. Yeesh. Oh, yes. You're already practicing your little salute, huh? Yes, you are. Well, we'll take care of that, won't we?"
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "Jesus Christ. This is so much tougher than I thought. Oh-ho."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "Oh, I'm going to hell."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "That makes two of us."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "You can do this."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "This is crazy. This is crazy. This is crazy. This is crazy. All right."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "Maximum effort."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "Tell me they got that in slow motion."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "You time-sliding son of a bitch. You did this for me? Wait, you can't go back. You used the last of your fuel. What about your girl and your wife?"
  • (Josh Brolin) "No, my family's safe. And I didn't do it for you. No, I'm gonna stick around for a while and make sure the world doesn't s*** itself into oblivion."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "No, you did it for me."
  • (Josh Brolin) "No, I didn't."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "You did."
  • (Josh Brolin) "No, I didn't."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "Pretty sure you did."
  • (Josh Brolin) "No, I'm positive I didn't."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "Fine. Alright, let's flip a coin, okay? Heads, you did it for me. Tails, you did it for me."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "I'm not even gonna look because you did it for me."
  • (Josh Brolin) "Say it again."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "You did it for me."
  • (Josh Brolin) "Jesus."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "f***"
  • (Colossus) "Pick on someone your own size."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "That's such a you thing to say. Go get 'em, tiger. Big CGI fight comin' up."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "And that's why "Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants" is pure pornography."
  • (Dopinder) "Wow."
  • (Zazie Beetz) "I really should have stayed in college --"
  • (Dopinder) "You're my Tom Cruise."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "And you're my Kristen Dunst."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "Kristen? Kirsten?"
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "Hands off that kid, John Conner."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "Go get 'em, tiger. Big CGI fight comin' up."
  • (Dopinder) "Oh, I s*** my pants."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "Actually, that may have been me."
  • (Unnamed) "Wade, is that you?"
  • (Unnamed) "I guess Stryker finally figured out how to shut you up"
  • (Unnamed) "."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "Hey. It's me. Don't scratch. Just tidying up the timeline."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "Love you."
  • (Colossus) "What are you doing?"
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "My job. You're the one who said I was ready, and I frankly disagreed with you. But here we are, trying to overcome our differences. Like Beyoncé says: please --"
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "please stop cheating on me."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "Only best buddies execute pedophiles together."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "That's okay. Let me see here. Oh, gosh. That's why you're such a little bastard. No one's ever changed you. Yeah, you got a big, old stinky in there, don't you? God, it smells like Hitler's anus, which -- which would make sense, wouldn't it? Yeah."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "I think we both know I don't have what it takes to do this, so I'm just gonna change your diaper real quick, and then I'm gonna come back with my friend Cable. He loves killing kids."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "As a former X-Man --"
  • (Bedlam) "Trainee."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "Thank you, Bedlam. I was always appalled by the blatant sexism in the group's name. X-Men? Men ? The point is, our group will be forward-thinking. Gender neutral. From now on, we'll be known as -- X-Force."
  • (Zazie Beetz) "Isn't that a little derivative?"
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "I don't recall asking your opinion, Peter."
  • (Peter) "-- That wasn't me."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "Tell me they got that in slow-motion --"
  • (Firefist) "Stay back or Justin Bieber dies."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "Ha. Justin Bieber. He called you Justin Bieber."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "Maybe the wind can't blow what it can't see."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "Really?"
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "Whoo. Do not go in there."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "Peter."
  • (Peter) "Whoo. X-Force."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "Walk away. Just walk away."
  • (Peter) "But we're X-Force."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "Nope. We're not. X-Force is just a marketing tool designed by Fox executives to keep Josh Brolin employed. It doesn't exist."
  • (Peter) "All right, well, this has been pretty scary. And I need to feed my cat."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "Go home, Sugarbear. Go home."
  • (Peter) "Okay. Will you give Domino my email?"
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "Cable, you get back to your family and you tell them Wade says hi. And promise me, promise me one thing: that you'll start judging people not by the color of the skin but by the content of their character."
  • (Josh Brolin) "Jesus --"
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "So, from our family to yours, keep your pants dry, your dreams wet, and remember, hugs not drugs."
  • (Colossus) "Come quietly, or there will be trouble."
  • (Firefist) "You stole that from Robocop."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "That's from Robocop. Just stand down. You're embarrassing me."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "What do you get when you take 8-feet of chrome, one pinch of courage, a cup of good luck, a dab of racism, a splash of diabetes, and a wheelbarrow of stage 4 cancer? Answer: A family. See? I didn't lie what kind of film this was. If there's anything you take away today; other than the need to google "what the f*** is dubstep"; it's that we all need to belong to someone."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "So, what exactly do you do in the future, anyway, huh? Some kind of soldier?"
  • (Josh Brolin) "Yeah, something like that."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "I was a soldier. Special Forces. I bet fifty years from now we'll be bestest buddies."
  • (Josh Brolin) "Fifty years from now you'll be very dead. Your entire generation will f*** this planet into a coma."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "Boom."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "Spoiler alert. Ha ha. Ah, planets."
  • (Zazie Beetz) "Next time Uber."
  • (Josh Brolin) "Here's a spoiler alert. You're not a f***ing hero. You're just an annoying clown dressed up as a sex toy."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "Well, I got news for you, my heart is in the right place. Russell's not gonna kill anyone. Because of me, he's gonna know what real love is."
  • (Josh Brolin) "Because of you, I'll always know what a grown man with baby balls looks like."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "I'm a grower, not a shower."
  • (Zazie Beetz) "I should've finished college."

Josh Brolin as Cable

  • (Josh Brolin) "The name's Cable. From the future. Just walk away."
  • (Wade Wilson) "Oh? So you're from the future? I have three questions, then. One: is dubstep still a thing? Two: which Sharknado are we on? And three: at what point will the audience say "enough with the robotic arms"?"
  • (Josh Brolin) "You remind me of my wife."
  • (Wade Wilson) "I'm sorry?"
  • (Josh Brolin) "I said you remind me --"
  • (Wade Wilson) "No, I'm sorry that you said that while making heavy eye contact and applying lip balm."
  • (Josh Brolin) "You're not a f***in' hero. You're just an annoying clown dressed up as a sex toy."
  • (Josh Brolin) "I'm retrieving something from my utility bag."
  • (T.J. Miller) "It's a god**** fanny pack and you know it, you sick son of a bitch. The difference is night and day."
  • (Josh Brolin) "Who are you?"
  • (Wade Wilson) "I'm Batman."
  • (Josh Brolin) "Dubstep's for pussies."
  • (Wade Wilson) "You're so dark. Are you sure you're not from the DC universe?"
  • (Josh Brolin) "I use a device to slide through time. The longer I travel, the harder it is to control. I got two charges: One to get me here, one to get me home."
  • (Wade Wilson) "Well, that's just lazy writing."
  • (Josh Brolin) "I was born into war, bred into it. People think they understand pain, but they have no concept of it. What's the most pain you've ever felt? Maybe the kind that leaves you more machine than man."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "Wait, no, STOP. What in the actual ass? Dale. Why, why are the visual effects not done? It's a metal arm. It's not like we're trying to remove a mustache. Oh f*** it, I'll do it myself --"

T.J. Miller as Weasel

  • (T.J. Miller) "I only do over the pants mouth stuff."
  • (Wade Wilson) "It lives up to the hype, plus plus."
  • (T.J. Miller) "f*** it. They probably won't even make a 3."
  • (Wade Wilson) "Yeah, why would they? Stop at 2, ya killed it."
  • (Wade Wilson) "George Michael was right. I'm never gonna dance again. f***. He's dead, too. At least we still have Bowie."
  • (T.J. Miller) "Yeah, we still --"
  • (T.J. Miller) "-- have Bowie."
  • (T.J. Miller) "Meet Bedlam."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "Cool name. Superpowers?"
  • (Bedlam) "I can distort electrical fields. Including the one inside your brain, causing anxiety, confusion, pain."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "So, basically, you're Dave Matthews."
  • (T.J. Miller) "Why wouldn't you cover that up?"
  • (Wade Wilson) "A warrior has nothing to be ashamed of."
  • (T.J. Miller) "Yeah, but you do. I mean, look at you, you're just straight shirt-cocking it? Toddler style?"
  • (Wade Wilson) "Oh yeah. Full Winnie the Pooh."
  • (Blind Al) "The hell's happening? Describe it."
  • (Wade Wilson) "I wouldn't ask him to do that if I were you."
  • (T.J. Miller) "It's like, um --"
  • (Wade Wilson) "Here we go."
  • (T.J. Miller) "It's like he was giving birth anally but they quit halfway through. They got the legs out and said "You know what? I'm done.""
  • (Wade Wilson) "Happy?"
  • (T.J. Miller) "It's like he's a Muppet from the waist down, but this time, you can see the Muppet's dick. Grover's got a cock the size of a --"
  • (Dopinder) "AH. Oh, no, no, no, DP, not again."
  • (T.J. Miller) "This has happened before?"
  • (T.J. Miller) "Jesus, either vomit or don't. The indecision is killing me."
  • (Blind Al) "Why couldn't God take my hearing?"
  • (T.J. Miller) "Go home. You've been here for three days, okay? You smell like somebody s*** in a civil war wound after it'd become gangrenous. They should've just amputated it, why s*** in it? Doesn't make any sense."
  • (Wade Wilson) "I loved her. I loved her like an ocean loves water."
  • (T.J. Miller) "An ocean is water."
  • (T.J. Miller) "And last but not least -- Peter."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "Any power you wanna tell us about."
  • (Peter) "I don't -- I don't have one. Um, I just saw the ad."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "You're in."
  • (Dopinder) "I could be of great use."
  • (Wade Wilson) "What's your superpower?"
  • (Dopinder) "Courage."
  • (Wade Wilson) "That's adorable."
  • (T.J. Miller) "Do you have the courage to check and see if there are enough sanitary napkins in the DISPENSER?"
  • (Dopinder) "Yes."

Jack Kesy as Black Tom

(We don't have any quotes for this character)

Zazie Beetz as Domino

  • (Zazie Beetz) "Lady Luck, take the wheel."
  • (Firefist) "We need a code."
  • (Zazie Beetz) "Try, uh -- seven?"
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "Settle down, Captain Lucky, it's not gonna be one number."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "God, that's lazy writing."
  • (Zazie Beetz) "They're headed into the tunnel."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "I'm that kid's only hope, so sit tight and wait for my word."
  • (Zazie Beetz) "Whatever. We're gonna lose 'em. I'm dropping in."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "Uh, that's a negative, sole survivor. Luck is not a superpower. We are so f***ed."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "No, we are most certainly not f***ed."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "Seriously, I don't get it. What, you shoot luck lasers out your eyes? It's just hard to picture. And certainly not very cinematic. I mean, luck? What coked-out, glass pipe-sucking freakshow comic book artist came up with that little chestnut? Probably a guy who can't draw feet."

Brianna Hildebrand as Negasonic Teenage Warhead

  • (Brianna Hildebrand) "She's my girlfriend you intolerant s***."
  • (Wade Wilson) "I'm just surprised anyone would date you, especially Pinkie Pie from My Little Pony."
  • (Brianna Hildebrand) "We're X-Men."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "No, you're X-People."
  • (Brianna Hildebrand) "You're X-hausting."
  • (Ryan Reynolds) "I see what you did there. Puns."

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