Dark Shadows (film) Quotes

Dark Shadows (film) is a TV show that first aired in 1970 . Dark Shadows stopped airing in 1970.

It features Richard D. Zanuck; Graham King; Johnny Depp, Christi Dembrowski, and David Kennedy as producer, Danny Elfman in charge of musical score, and Bruno Delbonnel as head of cinematography.

Dark Shadows (film) is recorded in English and originally aired in United States. Each episode of Dark Shadows (film) is 113 minutes long. Dark Shadows (film) is distributed by Warner Bros..

The cast includes: Johnny Depp as Barnabas Collins, Chloë Grace Moretz as Carolyn Stoddard, Michelle Pfeiffer as Elizabeth Collins Stoddard, Bella Heathcote as Victoria Winters, Gulliver McGrath as David Collins, Jonny Lee Miller as Roger Collins, Helena Bonham Carter as Dr. Julia Hoffman, Jackie Earle Haley as Willie Loomis, Christopher Lee as Clarney, and Guy Flanagan as Bearded Hippie.

Dark Shadows (film) Quotes

Gulliver McGrath as David Collins

• (Gulliver McGrath) "She's headed for Widow's Hill."

• (Gulliver McGrath) "Carolyn touches herself. She makes noises like a kitten."
• (Chloë Grace Moretz) "You little s***."

• (Gulliver McGrath) "Uncle Barnabas, why do you have ladies' underwear on your head?"
• (Johnny Depp) "Never mind that --"

• (Angelique Bouchard) "So, what are you going to do to me?"
• (Gulliver McGrath) "Not me. My mommy."

Johnny Depp as Barnabas Collins

• (Johnny Depp) "Hear me, future dweller, you will be my loyal servant, until such time as I release you."
• (Jackie Earle Haley) "So what's first, master?"
• (Johnny Depp) "You will cleanse me, servant."

• (Johnny Depp) "I have spent the last two centuries locked in a box, with nothing to keep me occupied but a glimpse into the dark shadows of my soul."

• (Johnny Depp) "I've spoken of my feelings to not a soul."
• (Bella Heathcote) "Yeah, you spoke only of my birthing hips."
• (Johnny Depp) "Yes --"

• (Johnny Depp) "My beloved home, what have they done to you?"

• (Angelique Bouchard) "What if I made you?"
• (Johnny Depp) "With what, a spell? A little doll with pins? That is not love."
• (Angelique Bouchard) "With THIS."
• (Johnny Depp) "Oh."
• (Angelique Bouchard) "With the body you once begged me for."
• (Johnny Depp) "I must admit, those have not aged a day --"

• (Johnny Depp) "Here are my terms: Goest thou to hell, and swiftly please, and there may Azmodaeus himself suckle from your diseased teat."

• (Johnny Depp) "That was a regrettable turn of events."
• (Angelique Bouchard) "You didn't seem to regret it."
• (Johnny Depp) "Yes. It seems that even in death, I have a weakness for the living flesh -- especially yours."
• (Angelique Bouchard) "What a cold way to describe something so hot."
• (Johnny Depp) "Perhaps. But I cannot succumb to your charms ever again. Please, forgive me."

• (Johnny Depp) "This is a very silly play."

• (Johnny Depp) "Missed me."

• (Johnny Depp) "I was not aware you were so threatened by my business acumen."
• (Angelique Bouchard) "Hypnotizing fishermen isn't acumen."

• (Johnny Depp) "It is said that blood is thicker than water. It is what joins us, binds us -- curses us. My name is Barnabas Collins, and my curse has finally been broken."

• (Johnny Depp) "I am reminded of a line from Erich Segal's 'Love Story': "Love means never having to say you're sorry." However, it is with sincere regret that I must now kill all of you."

• (Johnny Depp) "What is that thing?"
• (Helena Bonham Carter) "It's a lamp."
• (Johnny Depp) "It looks like a pulsating blood urn."

• (Johnny Depp) "We must intensify our efforts. I have an urgent need to be human again."
• (Helena Bonham Carter) "I can explain --"
• (Johnny Depp) "My God. You're not using your blood to make me human. You're using my blood to make yourself immortal."
• (Helena Bonham Carter) "Barnabas, you have a gift. You better get a hold over yourself --"
• (Johnny Depp) "The Collins family took you in and bestowed their sacred trust upon you, and you brazenly betray that trust?"
• (Helena Bonham Carter) "I'm sorry. I just didn't want to grow old. I want to be beautiful, and I want to live forever like you."
• (Johnny Depp) "I am afraid that is out of the question."

• (Angelique Bouchard) "I worshipped you."
• (Johnny Depp) "You plagued me."
• (Angelique Bouchard) "I adore you."
• (Johnny Depp) "I despise you."

• (Johnny Depp) "How soon can the horses be ready?"
• (Michelle Pfeiffer) "We don't have horses, we have a Chevy."

• (Angelique Bouchard) "I'm willing to start over, Barnabas. I'm willing to call a truce if you'll just -- take me."
• (Johnny Depp) "I am not what I once was."
• (Angelique Bouchard) "I can change that."
• (Johnny Depp) "And if I refuse?"
• (Angelique Bouchard) "I'll take everything you love, starting with that little creature you've been eying so fondly. The one who looks like JOSETTE."
• (Johnny Depp) "Well then, I suppose, strictly in the name of her honour, I must now defile myself for a few seconds --"

• (Johnny Depp) "It is said that blood is thicker than water. It is what defines us, binds us -- curses us."

• (Johnny Depp) "I don't have to tell you, Willie, that if you breathe a word of this to anyone, I shall have to kill you in a most unpleasant manner."
• (Jackie Earle Haley) "Don't worry Mr. B, I never liked the bitch anyway --"

• (Johnny Depp) "So, this is how it ends. There was a time, when I could have loved you. We could have spent eternity together."
• (Angelique Bouchard) "We still -- can --"
• (Johnny Depp) "You never loved me. You wanted to control me."

• (Johnny Depp) "I see you have been driven to even sell the prized family silverware."
• (Jonny Lee Miller) "How can you tell? Those are exact replicas."
• (Johnny Depp) "Had this been silver, I would have burst into flame at the slightest touch."
• (Helena Bonham Carter) "Is he for real?"

• (Johnny Depp) "Curious terrain."

• (Johnny Depp) "WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?"
• (Johnny Depp) "Angelique had cursed me to be a vampire, so that my suffering would never end."

• (Johnny Depp) "What is it that you want, Angelique?"
• (Angelique Bouchard) "Your love. Yo DO still love me, don't you, somewhere deep inside that cold but beating heart?"
• (Johnny Depp) "My dear, even Aphrodite herself could not construct a more odious union."

• (Johnny Depp) "Tell me, what do you know of Barnabas Collins?"
• (Michelle Pfeiffer) "Just legends, really. Two centuries ago, a witch turned him into a vampire and locked him away."
• (Johnny Depp) "What is known of his death?"
• (Michelle Pfeiffer) "Nothing."
• (Johnny Depp) "That, madam, is because he never died. I am Barnabas Collins."
• (Michelle Pfeiffer) "Then, you --"
• (Johnny Depp) "I am a vampire, madam. But I am also a Collins, and I swear by all I hold sacred I will not harm anyone under this roof."

• (Johnny Depp) "Josette --"
• (Bella Heathcote) "My name is Victoria Winters. Please, call me Vicky."
• (Johnny Depp) "Enchanted. But I shall call you Victoria, a name so wonderful to me that I could not stand to lose a single syllable of it."

• (Johnny Depp) "How dare you invade this home with your noxious --"
• (Angelique Bouchard) "It really is you."

• (Johnny Depp) "I thought I'd lost you."
• (Bella Heathcote) "You already have. We can never be together, Barnabas: I belong in the light and you belong in the shadows, I'll age and die while you live on."
• (Johnny Depp) "We can still find a way --"
• (Bella Heathcote) "There's only one way."
• (Johnny Depp) "No. I will not make you suffer as I have."
• (Johnny Depp) "NO."

• (Johnny Depp) "My name is Barnabas Collins. Two centuries ago, I made Collinwood my home -- until a jealous witch cursed me, condemning me to the shadows, for all time."

• (Johnny Depp) "Do you have any idea what you put me through?"
• (Angelique Bouchard) "Get over it, Barnabas."
• (Johnny Depp) "Locked in a box, for over two hundred years."
• (Angelique Bouchard) "Don't exaggerate, it was only a hundred and ninety-six."

• (Johnny Depp) "I was awakened, by a giant dragon with millions of teeth and a thousand shining eyes."

• (Johnny Depp) "I seek advice on the art of courting a woman of this time."
• (Chloë Grace Moretz) "You obviously mean Vicky."
• (Johnny Depp) "She has the most fertile birthing hips I've ever set eyes upon."
• (Chloë Grace Moretz) "You're weird."
• (Johnny Depp) "You really think so?"

• (Josette du Pres) "Promise me we'll be together."
• (Johnny Depp) "As Heaven is my witness, Josette, we shall spend eternity together."

• (Johnny Depp) "I know the body of this house as I do my own. Every brick, every passage --"
• (Michelle Pfeiffer) "That's where I keep my macrame."
• (Johnny Depp) "A disgraceful misuse, madam."

• (Johnny Depp) "A woman doctor -- what an age this is."

• (Johnny Depp) "Oh dear, hath my scent offended thee?"
• (Bella Heathcote) "No, no. It's just -- people I love haven't always loved me back."

• (Johnny Depp) "My father had quite a flair for secret passages; as a boy, I took it upon myself to discover each one. But this one is my favourite. "Family is the only real wealth," he would often remark. Though, clearly, he was not opposed to other kinds --"

• (Johnny Depp) "Know this: I mean to stay. I mean to be a part of this family again."

• (Johnny Depp) "I am terribly sorry, but you cannot imagine how thirsty I am --"

• (Johnny Depp) "Victoria -- my sweet Victoria --"
• (Bella Heathcote) "No -- Josette."

• (Johnny Depp) "Who's there? Oh, please, I swear on Heaven you will come to no harm. Please. Please. How many decades has it been?"
• (Gulliver McGrath) "It's been twenty minutes."
• (Johnny Depp) "Oh, Master David. However did you find me?"
• (Gulliver McGrath) "My mommy told me. You must think I'm crazy --"
• (Johnny Depp) "Master David, I think nothing of the sort."

• (Johnny Depp) "Let me out. Let me out, I say. Release me."

• (Johnny Depp) "You must have faith, Doctor. For if a man can become a monster, then a monster can become a man."

• (Johnny Depp) "I am prepared to go with you quietly, providing that no other members of my family come to harm. And that Miss Bouchard accompanies me."
• (Johnny Depp) "After all, are not the two of us kindred?"
• (Angelique Bouchard) "Go ahead, slaughter me. Show them what you are."
• (Johnny Depp) "No, I shall show them what WE are."

• (Johnny Depp) "Yes, I killed Dr Hoffman, and those workmen, as well as some very nice unshaven people. For every life I take, a part of my soul dies. But I kill, only because I am COMPELLED to."

• (Johnny Depp) "What sorcery is this?"
• (Johnny Depp) "Reveal yourself, tiny songstress."

• (Johnny Depp) "Of all the servants I could have spurned, of all the hearts I could have broken, I got one with a secret. I got the witch."

• (Angelique Bouchard) "I'm going to make an offer to you, Barnabas. My last. You can join me by my side and we can run Collinsport together as partners, and lovers -- or I'll put you back in the box."
• (Johnny Depp) "I have already prepared my counter-proposal. It reads thusly: You may strategically place your wonderful lips upon my posterior and kiss it repeatedly."

Helena Bonham Carter as Dr. Julia Hoffman

• (Helena Bonham Carter) "David believes his mother is a celestial immortality. Fascinating."

• (Helena Bonham Carter) "How would you describe Liverpool?"
• (Johnny Depp) "Filthy."

• (Helena Bonham Carter) "Barnabas, may I hypnotize you?"
• (Johnny Depp) "Madam, I do not believe that remotely possi --"

Chloë Grace Moretz as Carolyn Stoddard

• (Chloë Grace Moretz) "He's not staying with us forever, is he?"
• (Gulliver McGrath) "I like him."

• (Chloë Grace Moretz) "Woof."

• (Chloë Grace Moretz) "Are you stoned or something?"
• (Johnny Depp) "They tried stoning me, my dear. It did not work."
• (Johnny Depp) "When did they start allowing women of the night on the estate grounds?"

• (Chloë Grace Moretz) "Leave us alone."
• (Michelle Pfeiffer) "Carolyn? Carolyn, my God."
• (Chloë Grace Moretz) "I'm a werewolf, okay? Let's not make a big deal out of it. Woof."

• (Chloë Grace Moretz) "I have to hand it to you. This is a happening. I guess the only thing missing is Alice Cooper."
• (Johnny Depp) "Perhaps you should go and acquaint yourself with the evening's entertainment."
• (Johnny Depp) "-- ugliest woman I've ever seen."

• (Chloë Grace Moretz) "I don't feel comfortable discussing this with you."
• (Johnny Depp) "Do not fear, my child. I simply seek advice on the art of courting a woman of this time -- Land. And who better to tutor me than a woman of your age? What is your age, if I may?"
• (Chloë Grace Moretz) "Fifteen."
• (Johnny Depp) "Fifteen and no husband. You must put those birthing hips to good use at once lest your womb shrivel up and die."
• (Chloë Grace Moretz) "You're weird."
• (Johnny Depp) "But do you think me too weird for a woman of this -- land?"
• (Chloë Grace Moretz) "You obviously mean Vicky."
• (Johnny Depp) "She has the most fertile birthing hips I have ever laid eyes upon."
• (Chloë Grace Moretz) "You're way too weird."
• (Johnny Depp) "Do you really think so?"
• (Chloë Grace Moretz) "You're all stiff, proper and old-fashioned."
• (Johnny Depp) "And Victoria -- Is she not proper?"
• (Chloë Grace Moretz) "She likes to pretend she's rock 'n' roll. She's a Carpenters kind of chick for sure."
• (Johnny Depp) "Do you mean to say that she has a penchant for woodworkers?"
• (Chloë Grace Moretz) "The Carpenters are musicians, stupid."
• (Johnny Depp) "Ah, music. Yes, I'm rather fond of the music of the day. "I am a picker, I am a grinner / I am a lover and I am a sinner / I play my music in the sun" If only Shakespeare had been as eloquent."
• (Chloë Grace Moretz) "Okay. If you wanna get with her, you're gonna have to change your approach. Drop the whole weird Swinging London thing and hang out with a few normal people."

Michelle Pfeiffer as Elizabeth Collins Stoddard

• (Michelle Pfeiffer) "What do you think of the President?"
• (Bella Heathcote) "Never met him."
• (Michelle Pfeiffer) "What do you think of the war?"
• (Bella Heathcote) "I don't watch television."
• (Michelle Pfeiffer) "Do you think the sexes should be equal?"
• (Bella Heathcote) "Heavens, no. Men would become quite unmanageable."
• (Michelle Pfeiffer) "I think we're going to get along fine."

• (Michelle Pfeiffer) "Welcome to Collinwood. You'll have to imagine us on a better day."

• (Michelle Pfeiffer) "Fight on, Barnabas. Fight on for us."
• (Johnny Depp) "And fight I shall."

• (Michelle Pfeiffer) "Welcome home, Barnabas Collins."

• (Michelle Pfeiffer) "Barnabas -- you're on fire."

• (Michelle Pfeiffer) "What did you do to my daughter?"
• (Angelique Bouchard) "The family tree needed a little spicing up, so I sent a werewolf to bite her as a child."
• (Angelique Bouchard) "Just as I sent David's mother to the bottom of the ocean, rendering him a motherless whelp."
• (Angelique Bouchard) "And as for you -- I killed your parents, and every one of your lovers. They kept us apart."

• (Michelle Pfeiffer) "Children, get away from that man."
• (Gulliver McGrath) "He said his name was Barnabas Collins."
• (Chloë Grace Moretz) "And I'm pretty sure he called me a hooker."

Jackie Earle Haley as Willie Loomis

• (Jackie Earle Haley) "Fire. Murder. Mob, angry."

• (Jackie Earle Haley) "It's October. S'why there's punkins."

• (Jackie Earle Haley) "You're gonna have to go through me."

• (Jackie Earle Haley) "Captain Clarney, I'd like you to meet Barnabas Collins."
• (Christopher Lee) "Collins? And uh, why does a Collins want to talk to me?"
• (Johnny Depp) "To offer you a contract."
• (Christopher Lee) "I have a contract. With Angel Bay."
• (Johnny Depp) "And if I told you I could offer you a better one?"
• (Christopher Lee) "Then, Mr. Collins, I would tell you to take a long walk off a short pier."

Guy Flanagan as Bearded Hippie

(We don't have any quotes for this character)

Bella Heathcote as Victoria Winters

• (Bella Heathcote) "Hello. My name is Victoria Winters."
• (Jackie Earle Haley) "Congratulations."

• (Bella Heathcote) "Hello, my name is Maggie Ev -- Hello, my name is Victoria Winters. Please, call me Vicky."

• (Bella Heathcote) "I don't know why, but in some ways I feel I can tell you anything. It's like I've known you forever."
• (Johnny Depp) "Yes."
• (Bella Heathcote) "It's as if I am hypnotized --"
• (Johnny Depp) "Yes -- Wait, no. I have used no such trickery upon you, I assure you."
• (Bella Heathcote) "I don't know what it is, I just know that there's always been something pulling me here, pulling me to Collinsport and you --"

• (Bella Heathcote) "He claims to talk to his dead mother. Part of me thinks it's a fantasy, to gain attention. Another part believes it's real, that things such as magic and ghosts do exist. Still, whichever it is to make him happy. I mean as long as one gains happiness, who am I to argue with how they find it?"
• (Johnny Depp) "Eloquently put."

Jonny Lee Miller as Roger Collins

• (Jonny Lee Miller) "What are you d?"
• (Johnny Depp) "I am about to do something so repellent, it sickens me to my very core --. I am going to give you a choice: you can either devote every waking moment to being an exemplary father to young David."
• (Jonny Lee Miller) "Or?"
• (Johnny Depp) "Or you can leave, with sufficient funds to provide for the rest of your life."

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