Poetry and Quotations

Poem of Quotes is dedicated to bringing poetry, quotations and information to the www.

Funny Thanksgiving Quotes

An optimist is a person who starts a new diet on Thanksgiving Day.
Irv Kupcinet

The pilgrims made seven times more graves than huts... nevertheless, set aside a day of thanksgiving.
H. W. Westermayer

On Thanksgiving Day we acknowledge our dependence.
William Jennings Bryan

I love Thanksgiving turkey... it's the only time in Los Angeles that you see natural breasts.
Arnold Schwarzenegger

Thanksgiving, man! Not a good day to be my pants.
Kevin James

Thanksgiving dinners take eighteen hours to prepare. They are consumed in twelve minutes. Half-times take twelve minutes. This is not coincidence.
Erma Bombeck

It was dramatic to watch my grandmother decapitate a turkey with an ax the day before Thanksgiving. Nowadays the expense of hiring grandmothers for the ax work would probably qualify all turkeys so honored with gourmet status.
Russell Baker

Coexistence... what the farmer does with the turkey - until Thanksgiving.
Mike Connolly

My mother is such a lousy cook that Thanksgiving at her house is a time of sorrow.
Rita Rudner

I celebrated Thanksgiving in an old-fashioned way. I invited everyone in my neighborhood to my house, we had an enormous feast, and then I killed them and took their land.
Jon Stewart

---

More Thanksgiving Day quotes

Humorous Thanksgiving quotations

More holiday quotes

Christmas
Easter
Fathers Day
Halloween
Independence Day
Labor Day
Mother's Day
New Years
Valentine's Day

Related pages
Thanksgiving eCards
Thanksgiving poems