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Wild Wild West Quotes

Wild Wild West is a TV show that first aired in 1970 . Wild Wild West ended its run in 1970.

It features Jon Peters, and Barry Sonnenfeld as producer, Elmer Bernstein in charge of musical score, and Michael Ballhaus as head of cinematography.

Wild Wild West is recorded in English and originally aired in United States. Each episode of Wild Wild West is 106 minutes long. Wild Wild West is distributed by Warner Bros..

The cast includes: Kenneth Branagh as Dr. Arliss Loveless, M. Emmet Walsh as Coleman, Salma Hayek as Rita Escobar, Ted Levine as McGrath, Kenneth Branagh as Arliss Loveless, Bai Ling as Miss East, Musetta Vander as Munitia, and Garcelle Beauvais-Nilon as Belle.

Wild Wild West Quotes

Kenneth Branagh as Dr. Arliss Loveless

  • (Kenneth Branagh) "Mr. President, for the last time, sign the surrender, or I will decimate this town."
  • (President Grant) "You've had my answer."
  • (Kenneth Branagh) "Well, I understand your position, sir, but I urge you to reconsider, in light of the following."
  • (Kenneth Branagh) "Why y'all look like you've seen a ghost? It's me, dear friends; alive and kicking. Well, alive, anyway. We may have lost the war, but heaven knows we haven't lost our sense of humor. No, not even when we've lost a lung, a spleen, a bladder, two legs, thirty-five feet of small intestine, and our ability to reproduce; all in the name of the South.; do we EVER LOSE OUR SENSE OF HUMOR."
  • (Capt. James West) "For four long years I've been chasing the animal responsible for the massacre at New Liberty. I hear tell that's you."
  • (Kenneth Branagh) "I am not an animal. I am a visionary, I am a genius, and now I am angry. And after I kill you, I swear I'm going to boil you down for axle grease."
  • (Kenneth Branagh) "Rita, my dear. Not that I'm ungrateful to providence for bringing you back, but I have to confess; I'm just a little bit curious as to how you managed to wind up with them."
  • (Salma Hayek) "Well, they seemed so sure that they could find you, I thought if I stayed with them, they'd bring me back to all my friends."
  • (Salma Hayek) "Not to give you a big head, but, I kind of missed you."
  • (Kenneth Branagh) "Well, isn't that a coincidence? Cos, I kinda miss me too."
  • (Kenneth Branagh) "Mister West. How nice of you to join us tonight and add COLOR to these monochromatic proceedings."
  • (Capt. James West) "Well when a fella comes back from the dead, I find that an occasion to STAND UP and be counted."
  • (Kenneth Branagh) "Miss East informs me that you were expectin' to see General McGrath here. Well, I knew him years ago, but I haven't seen him in a COON's age."
  • (Capt. James West) "Well, I can see where it'd be difficult for a man of your stature to keep in touch with even HALF the people you know."
  • (Kenneth Branagh) "Well, perhaps the lovely Miss East will keep you from bein' a SLAVE to your disappointment."
  • (Capt. James West) "Well, you know beautiful women; they encourage you one minute, and CUT THE LEGS OUT from under you the next."
  • (Kenneth Branagh) "Well, I'll be a MONKEY'S uncle. How how did we arrive in this DARK situation?"
  • (Capt. James West) "I don't know, Dr. Loveless. I'm just as STUMPED as you are."
  • (Kenneth Branagh) "Well, I think that concludes this night's festivities. Ladies, feed him to the crabs."
  • (Kenneth Branagh) "Gentlemen, since the beginning of written history a nation's power has been measured by the size of its standing army. Tonight that chapter will be closed. The traditional army, to say nothing of the United States, will become extinct, laid low by a cripple -."
  • (Kenneth Branagh) "-as the general so amusingly implied, and mechanology. But my friends, that tank is just a little hors d'oeuvre compared to what the country's greatest scientists are cooking up for me next. So, if I have piqued your interest, bring one thousand kilograms of your country's gold to Spider Canyon in ten days time. And now if you'll excuse me, I have a tank to catch."
  • (Kenneth Branagh) "Well now isn't this a coincidence? I'm out for a little morning ride and right in the middle of nowhere I bump into General Ulysses S. Grant himself."

Salma Hayek as Rita Escobar

  • (Salma Hayek) "He's so impetuous."
  • (Artemus Gordon) "Yes, he's an idiot."

Ted Levine as McGrath

  • (Ted Levine) "What's this?"
  • (Artemus Gordon) "Why, it's a deep, deep pool. Maybe it's your old swimming hole, General. Are you feeling sleepy?"
  • (Ted Levine) "Yes, I'm sleepy."
  • (Artemus Gordon) "Good. Now you're going to be my little doggy, and when I say "speak" you're going to tell me everything I want to know. Understand?"
  • (Ted Levine) "Woof."
  • (Artemus Gordon) "Good boy. Now, which scientist is that in the next room? Is it Dr. Escobar? Speak."
  • (Ted Levine) "Woof. Woof."
  • (Artemus Gordon) "You can speak words, you stupid mutt."
  • (Ted Levine) "You sawed-off sadistic bastard. You've betrayed us."
  • (Kenneth Branagh) "My dear General, having donated half of my physical being to create a weapon capable of doing this, how did you and General Lee repay my loyalty? You surrendered at Appomattox. So who betrayed whom?"

Musetta Vander as Munitia

  • (Musetta Vander) "I have them square in my sights, Sire."
  • (Kenneth Branagh) "As do I, Munitia. As do I."

Garcelle Beauvais-Nilon as Belle

  • (Garcelle Beauvais-Nilon) "Oo Jim."
  • (Capt. James West) "Uh, as much as I'd like to take credit for that, darling, you might wanna hand me my gun."

M. Emmet Walsh as Coleman

  • (M. Emmet Walsh) "President thought you boys could use a little looking-after. But I draw the line at defying gravity, so good luck."

Bai Ling as Miss East

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