Van Wilder: The Rise of Taj Quotes

Van Wilder: The Rise of Taj is a television show that appeared on TV in 1970 . Van Wilder: The Rise of Taj ended its run in 1970.

It features Peter Abrams as producer, Robert Folk in charge of musical score, and Hubert Taczanowski as head of cinematography.

Van Wilder: The Rise of Taj is recorded in English and originally aired in United States. Each episode of Van Wilder: The Rise of Taj is 92 minutes long. Van Wilder: The Rise of Taj is distributed by Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer.

The cast includes: Kal Penn as Taj, Steven Rathman as Simon, Holly Davidson as Sadie, Glen Barry as Seamus, and Anthony Cozens as Gethin.

Van Wilder: The Rise of Taj Quotes

Kal Penn as Taj

• (Kal Penn) "Simon?"
• (Steven Rathman) "I have -- I have a problem."
• (Kal Penn) "Oh, my God, he's talking. Well, Simon, whatever you problem is, we're your friends, you can tell us."
• (Steven Rathman) "Well, you wee, it's to do with the size of my piddler"
• (Kal Penn) "Your -- Oh. Well, you know, it's an understood fact that a man's piddler is -- Appears smaller to himself than it is in real life."
• (Steven Rathman) "Well, you see, that's what I'm afraid of. 'Cause according to me it has some 11 inches."
• (Kal Penn) "Come again? Figuratively."

• (Woman on Plane) "Excuse me, is that Madamendira Bombay Hot Sauce?"
• (Kal Penn) "No way, you know it?"
• (Woman on Plane) "I have this -- thing for spices."
• (Kal Penn) "You have a TING?"

• (Unnamed) "Let's settle this the way my ancestors did."
• (Kal Penn) "You want to exploit me economically?"

• (Kal Penn) "A surprise in the woods? Well, can you give me a second? Let me go repack my wallet real quick."

• (Preppy) "Let's settle this the way our ancestors did."
• (Kal Penn) "You're going to exploit me economically?"

Anthony Cozens as Gethin

• (Anthony Cozens) "Sadie, this is Taj Badalandabad, our new head of house."
• (Holly Davidson) "Alright me ol' mucker, have a shake then I ain't got the clap or nothing."
• (Anthony Cozens) "She means Handshake."
• (Kal Penn) "Of course, of course, Hi."
• (Anthony Cozens) "Sadie is a cockney. It takes time to understand her words, they fit in her mouth funny."
• (Kal Penn) "Lucky words. You enjoying your time at Camford, Sadie?"
• (Holly Davidson) "Yeah, It's alright. Blokes here are a bit stuffy here though. I mean I never thought it would be so hard finding someone worth slapping the ol' panhandle. You know, giving a blowjob. Nothing like getting your tongue around a nice fat one. Sliding it in, and out, in, and out, in, and out, in, and out. Milking it like a cow until it explodes in the back of your mouth."
• (Kal Penn) "Wow, I must have an amazing ear for dialects. I understood everything she said perfectly."

Holly Davidson as Sadie

• (Holly Davidson) "No, Taj; I was talking about her vagina."

• (Holly Davidson) "I'm surprised you don't get out more."

Glen Barry as Seamus

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