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The Sopranos Quotes

The Sopranos is a Crime drama that first aired in 1999 on HBO. The Sopranos ended in 2007.

The Sopranos was on for 6 seasons and 86 episodes. It features plain list, and * Phil Abraham (47 episodes) * Alik Sakharov (38 episodes) as head of cinematography. The Sopranos is executive produced by plain list The Sopranos is created by David Chase.

The Sopranos is recorded in English and originally aired in United States. Each episode of The Sopranos is Approximately 50 minutes long. The Sopranos is produced by plain list and * Chase Films * Brad Grey Television * HBO Entertainment .

The Sopranos Quotes

  • (Corrado Erico 'Uncle Junior' Soprano) "How much White Castle did you have?"
  • (Bobby "Bacala" Baccalieri) "I had none. I swear."
  • (Corrado Erico 'Uncle Junior' Soprano) "I can SMELL it."
  • (Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr.) "Cunnilingus and psychiatry brought us to this."
  • (Bobby "Bacala" Baccalieri) "How's it going? You're the head of the union aren't you?"
  • (Unnamed) "Yeah, I am. Who are you?"
  • (Bobby "Bacala" Baccalieri) "Just a casual observer. You know, I've been following the situation, and I gotta tell you, it doesn't make much sense to me. I mean you recently got an offer, for a lot of money. And, if you don't get paid, you can't feed your family. I presume you got a family. I'm a family man myself, and I gotta tell you I'd rather take two shots to the back of the f***ing head than not be able to feed my family."
  • (Bobby "Bacala" Baccalieri) "One -- Two -- To the back of the head. You think about that."
  • (Paulie 'Walnuts' Gualtieri) "You didn't go to hell. You went to purgatory, my friend."
  • (Unnamed) "We've had every one of Tony Soprano's phones bugged for four years, but the guy says less than Harpo Marx."
  • (Tony Soprano) "Oh, poor baby. What do you want, a Whitman's Sampler?"
  • (Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr.) "It's like taking a s***."
  • (Dr. Jennifer Melfi) "Ok. I actually like to think about it as a childbirth."
  • (Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr.) "Trust me. It's like taking a s***."
  • (Livia Soprano) "I wish the Lord would take me now."
  • (Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr.) "It wasn't like it was friggin' Cobain. It was just a little suicidal gesture, that's all."
  • (Eugene Pontecorvo) "The only thing I ever found in the street was my first wife."
  • (Livia Soprano) "Oh his father was the same way. I practically LIVED in that vice principal's office."
  • (Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr.) "Could we not?"
  • (Livia Soprano) "Oh well you only remember what you want to remember. I must have had another son who stole a car when he was ten years old."
  • (Livia Soprano) "Yeah, he could barely see over the steering wheel."
  • (Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr.) "Skip the preambles --"
  • (Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr.) "If you can quote the rules, then you can obey them."
  • (Tony Blundetto) "It's hard to believe. My cousin in the old man's seat."
  • (Paulie 'Walnuts' Gualtieri) "It's like "Sun-Tuh-Zoo" says: a good leader is benevolent and unconcerned with fame."
  • (Tony Blundetto) "What?"
  • (Paulie 'Walnuts' Gualtieri) ""Sun-Tuh-Zoo". He's Chinese Prince prince Matchabelli."
  • (Silvio Dante) "Tzu, Tzu. Sun Tzu, you f***ing ass-kiss."
  • (Christopher Moltisanti) "It's an idea, I don't know. Who knows where it f***ing came from? Isaac Newton invented gravity because some asshole hit him with an apple."
  • (Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr.) "I wipe my ass with your feelings."
  • (Silvio Dante) "Chrissie, I hear you're doing good with the gambling."
  • (Christopher Moltisanti) "You kidding me? With the money I made, I could go work at Denny's for the rest of my life."
  • (Silvio Dante) "Yeah, like they would ever hire you."
  • (Unnamed) "So, let's keep in touch. Call me when your grandson is born."
  • (Unnamed) "When he's born, I wouldn't want to be thinking about you."
  • (Carmela Soprano) "I know you better than anybody, Tony, even your friends. Which is probably why you hate me."
  • (Phil Leotardo) "Let me tell you a couple of three things: Forget Coco, forget Fat Dom who goes over to Jersey and never comes back, forget my brother Billy."
  • (Junior Soprano) "The joint, not like in the old days. f***in' animals in there."
  • (Feech La Manna) "It's all about setting the precedent."
  • (Janice Soprano) "God, I love marrow, just like Ma. Remember Ma with a bone? It sounded like half-price day at a liposuction clinic."
  • (Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr.) "There's an old Italian saying: you f*** up once, you lose two teeth."
  • (Christopher) "Fear knocked on the door. Faith answered. There was no one there."
  • (Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr.) "You got any idea what my life would be worth if certain people found out I checked into a laughing academy?"
  • (Dr. Jennifer Melfi) "Let's get back to Pie-O-My, it's sad that you lost something you loved. That being said, it is a horse."
  • (Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr.) "What the f***'s the matter with you?"
  • (Tony Soprano) "Is everyone in my life f***in' bananas?"
  • ('Little' Carmine Lupertazzi Jr.) "The fundamental question is, will I be as effective as a boss like my dad was? And I will be, even more so? But until I am, it's going to be hard to verify that I think I'll be more effective."
  • (Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr.) "Log off, that "cookies" s*** makes me nervous."
  • (Paulie 'Walnuts' Gualtieri) "You're late."
  • (Ralph Cifaretto) "Well, at least I can always be on time tomorrow, but you'll be stupid forever."
  • (Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr.) "Sil, break it down for 'em. What two business have traditionally been recession-proof since time immemorial?"
  • (Silvio Dante) "Certain aspects of show business and our thing."
  • (Unnamed) "There he is."
  • (Corrado Erico 'Uncle Junior' Soprano) "Since Moses wore short pants."
  • (Silvio Dante) "You're only as good as your last envelope."
  • (Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr.) "Look, maybe I am wrong, but you have really changed since the old man died. First, Lorraine Caluzzo. Then you sink this idiot's boat. This not the John I knew."
  • (Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr.) "I thought I was the only one Junior could make look like that."
  • (Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr.) "End of story."
  • (Furio Giunta) "don't bitch to me."
  • (Feech La Manna) "What's yours is your Pauly, but what ain't, belongs to anybody else."
  • (Paulie 'Walnuts' Gualtieri) "Oh, what do you know about what belongs to who? You been in prison for twenty years."
  • (Feech La Manna) "Which entitles me to earn."
  • (Paulie 'Walnuts' Gualtieri) "Which entitles you to s***. In my book, you get points for staying out."
  • (Feech La Manna) "Then it's a good thing, Paulie, that your book doesn't mean oogatz to me."
  • (Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr.) "Vito, you did tell the police you didn't know who did this, right?"
  • (Vito Spatafore) "Please. I may be distressed, but I know how to keep my mouth shut."
  • (Ralph Cifaretto) "Unless there's a big tuna sandwich around."
  • (Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr.) "Listen to me, the only reason I did this is because you're my nephew, and I love you. If it were anybody else, they would've gotten that intervention through the back of their f***ing head."
  • (Christopher Moltisanti) "What do you have to be stressed about? That bar?"
  • (Adriana La Cerva) "War, Christopher? The Middle East."
  • (Christopher Moltisanti) "You don't listen to the president? We're gonna mop the floor with the whole f***in' world. The whole world's gonna be under our control. So what are you worked up about?"
  • (Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr.) "What f***ing kind of human being am I, if my own mother wants me dead?"
  • (Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr.) "You're looking good. Looking better."
  • (Corrado Erico 'Uncle Junior' Soprano) "Tony, if you're gonna lie to me, tell me there's a broad in the car waiting to tongue my balls."
  • (Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr.) "Hey, You want that, it's a phone call away."
  • (Tony Blundetto) "To think, when I got out of the joint, I thought an airbag was Paulie Walnuts."
  • (Silvio Dante) "My daughter got off on this feminist rant. She told me it's demeaning for a girl to be working at the Bing. The fact that these girls make $1500 a week has no bearing with my principessa."
  • (Paulie 'Walnuts' Gualtieri) "Hey, Sil. You remember your first blowjob?"
  • (Silvio Dante) "Oh, yeah."
  • (Paulie 'Walnuts' Gualtieri) "How long did it take for the guy to come?"
  • (Adriana La Cerva) "They broke my f***in' chair."
  • (Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr.) "All due respect, you got no f***in' idea what it's like to be Number One. Every decision you make affects every facet of every other f***in' thing. It's too much to deal with almost. And in the end you're completely alone with it all."
  • (Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr.) "A wrong decision is better than indecision."
  • (Salvatore 'Big p*****' Bompensiero) "Hey, Sil."
  • (Silvio Dante) "What?"
  • (Salvatore 'Big p*****' Bompensiero) ""What". I've been gone a long time. Let me hear it."
  • (Silvio Dante) "Just when I thought I was out, THEY PULL ME BACK IN."
  • (Silvio Dante) "What the f*** are you doing?"
  • (Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr.) "Sil, take it easy."
  • (Silvio Dante) "I'm losin' my balls over here. This f***ing moron's playing "Hazel"."
  • (Silvio Dante) "Get the f*** out of here."
  • (Matthew Bevilaqua) "I was just trying to sweep the cheese away --"
  • (Silvio Dante) "Why? Why now? Leave it there."
  • (Matthew Bevilaqua) "I don't know. I was just --"
  • (Silvio Dante) "What?"
  • (Silvio Dante) "Where do you get these f***in' idiots, huh? Where do you get them? He's sweeping the cheese, I'm trying to get --"
  • (Silvio Dante) "Leave the f***ing cheese there, all right? I love f***in' cheese at my feet. I stick motherf***in' provolone in my socks at night, so they smell like your sister's crotch in the morning. Alright? Now leave the f***ing cocksucking cheese where it is. Here, here, here."
  • (Silvio Dante) "Go ahead. Have a good time."
  • (Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr.) "Where the f*** have you been? You're late."
  • (Christopher) "Sorry, the highway was jammed with broken heroes on a last-chance power drive."
  • (Dr. Jennifer Melfi) "Sure. You want someone who's sensitive to your needs, but still decisive enough for the occasional grope in the closet."
  • (Tony Blundetto) "What do I find in a pork store? A bunch of guys beating their meat."
  • (Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr.) "So, what step are you at now?"
  • (Christopher Moltisanti) "I did all the steps, except for the one where I'm supposed to go around and apologize to all the people I f***ed over when I was using."
  • (Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr.) "-- I think maybe you shouldn't do that one. You know, let sleeping dogs lie."
  • (Christopher Moltisanti) "Yeah, that's what I was thinking."
  • (Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr.) "I called you here, 'cause I got something to tell you. From now on, I'm gonna rely on you more and more, 'cause you're the only one I can fully trust. Sil and Paulie -- they're old friends, but you're one thing they're not."
  • (Christopher Moltisanti) "What's that, T?"
  • (Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr.) "Blood. You're gonna lead this family into the 21st Century."
  • (Christopher Moltisanti) "Well, Tony, technically we're already in the 21st Century --"
  • (Christopher Moltisanti) "Forget about it. You won't regret this, T."
  • (Ralphie Cifaretto) "-- and I know I'm the guy who's dating your mom,"
  • (Jackie Aprile Jr.) "Dating?"
  • (Ralphie Cifaretto) "Don't get f***in' filthy about it."
  • (Christopher Moltisanti) "Whatever you do, do not engage Silvio in conversation."
  • (Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr.) "He'd been in prison. He was away when I was a little kid. They told me he was in Montana, being a cowboy."
  • (Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr.) "The belt was his favorite child development tool."
  • (Phil Leotardo) "There are no scraps in my scrapbook."
  • (Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr.) "English?"
  • (Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr.) "It's okay. It's okay."
  • (Mikey Palmice) "Junior Soprano's the new boss and he ain't respectin' old arrangements."
  • (Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr.) "Maybe I should tap into my roots, too. My grandmother was half Indian."
  • (Christopher Moltisanti) "Get the f*** out of here."
  • (Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr.) "No, it's true. She was in the Fakawee tribe."
  • (Christopher Moltisanti) "Oh, yeah?"
  • (Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr.) "Yeah. When they used to get lost in the woods, they stopped and said "Where the Fakawee?""
  • (Dr. Jennifer Melfi) "Are you still taking the lithium?"
  • (Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr.) "Lithium, Prozac. When's it gonna end?"
  • (Dr. Jennifer Melfi) "We're trying to give a jolt to your system. Give it a -- a little kick-start."
  • (Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr.) "Why don't you kick me in the f***in' head?"
  • (Dr. Jennifer Melfi) "I know what you're going through must be painful."
  • (Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr.) "This isn't painful. Getting shot is painful. Getting stabbed in the ribs is painful. This s*** isn't painful. It's empty -- dead."
  • (Ralphie Cifaretto) "I hate to do it, Artie. But I think I'm gonna pass."
  • (Artie Bucco) "Why not?"
  • (Ralphie Cifaretto) "'Cause if you don't pay me back, I ain't gonna be able to hurt ya."
  • (Carmela Soprano) "I would have to get a lawyer, find an apartment, arrange for child support."
  • (Dr. Krakower) "You're not listening. I'm not charging you because I won't take blood money. You can't either. One thing you can never say: You haven't been told."
  • (Adriana La Cerva) "Ralph was asking if Tony was at the club. Why? Is he gonna be?"
  • (Christopher) "You don't know what this guy did for me."
  • (Adriana La Cerva) "Yeah I do."
  • (Christopher) "Not just getting my stripes, something I can't talk about. Something that was ruining my whole life and he made it right. For what I owe him, I would follow that man into hell."

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