The Office (U.S. season 3) Quotes

The Office is a TV show that appeared on TV in 2006 on NBC. The Office ended its run in 2007.

The Office aired for 25 episodes.

The Office Quotes

• (Michael Scott) "I -- declare -- BANKRUPTCY."
• (Unnamed) "Hey, I just wanted you to know that you can't just say the word bankruptcy and expect anything to happen."
• (Michael Scott) "I didn't say it, I declared it."

• (Michael Scott) "I am running away from my responsibilities. And it feels good."

• (Michael Scott) "That's what she said."

• (Unnamed) "Hey, I want to set you up with my daughter"
• (Unnamed) "Oh, I'm engaged to Pam."
• (Unnamed) "I thought you were gay?"
• (Unnamed) "Then why would you want to set me up with your daughter?"
• (Unnamed) "I don't know."

• (Michael Scott) "Close your eyes. Picture a convict. What's he wearing? Nothing special; baseball cap on backward, baggy pants. He says something ordinary like, "Yo, that's shizzle". Okay, now slowly open your eyes again. Who are you picturing? A black man? Wrong. That was a white woman. Surprised? Well, shame on you."

• (Andy Bernard) "Rit-dit-dit-do-doo."

• (Unnamed) "Dunder Mifflin, this is Pam."

• (Michael Scott) "This is an environment of welcoming, and you should just get the hell out of here."

• (Andy Bernard) "I'm always thinking one step ahead, like a carpenter that makes stairs."

• (Unnamed) "Nope, it's not Ashton Kutcher. It's Kevin Malone. Equally handsome, equally smart."

• (Unnamed) "Seriously? You're gonna sit in the back?"
• (Unnamed) "Uh, yeah? That's the safest part of a car. In the event of a crash, the driver always protects his side first."

• (Unnamed) "Jim, would you prefer a nature metaphor or a sexual metaphor?"
• (Unnamed) "Oh, God, nature. Please."
• (Unnamed) "When two animals are having sex --"

• (Michael Scott) "Dwight, you ignorant slut."

• (Michael Scott) "I'm not superstitious, but I am a little stitious."

• (Unnamed) "Boy have you done lost your mind? Cause I'll HELP you find it."

• (Michael Scott) "I see the sales department are down there, they're in the engine room, and they are shoveling coal into the furnace. Right? I mean, who saw the movie Titanic? They were very important in the movie Titanic."
• (Unnamed) "Everyone in the engine room drowned."

• (Unnamed) "Hi, Mich --"
• (Michael Scott) "No, God --. No, God, please, no --. No --. No --. Nooooo."

• (Michael Scott) "Occasionally, I'll hit somebody with my car. So sue me."

• (Unnamed) "I was thinking maybe we could jam his drawers so they only come out two inches, and then that way you could see everything in them but you can't get in them."
• (Unnamed) "Does Edgar Allan Poe know about that one? So sinister."
• (Unnamed) "That wouldn't annoy a person at all. What do you; where do you come up with this stuff?"
• (Unnamed) "Okay. Alright, well, this isn't my best, but call Froggy101. Say that we're the tour manager for Justin Bieber and we're giving away free tickets, we give them a number to call for the tickets, and it's his number."
• (Unnamed) "Who is Justice Beaver?"
• (Unnamed) "He -- it's a crime-fighting beaver."

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