The Mask (film) Quotes

The Mask (film) is a television program that debuted in 1970 . The Mask stopped airing in 1970.

It features Bob Engelman as producer, Randy Edelman in charge of musical score, and John R. Leonetti as head of cinematography.

The Mask (film) is recorded in English and originally aired in United States. Each episode of The Mask (film) is 101 minutes long. The Mask (film) is distributed by New Line Cinema.

The cast includes: Jim Carrey as The Mask, Jim Carrey as Mask, Jim Doughan as Doyle, Richard Jeni as Charlie Schumacher, Nancy Fish as Mrs. Peenman, Eamonn Roche as Mr. Dickey, Ben Stein as Dr. Arthur Neuman, Amy Yasbeck as Peggy Brandt, Denis Forest as Eddy, Richard Jeni as Maggie, Reg E. Cathey as Freeze, and Orestes Matacena as Niko.

The Mask (film) Quotes

Amy Yasbeck as Peggy Brandt

• (Amy Yasbeck) "Hi, I'm Peggy Brandt from the Tribune."
• (Stanley Ipkiss) "Oh, hi. Look, I cancelled my subscription because they kept stealing my paper from the --"
• (Amy Yasbeck) "Oh, no, actually, I just want to ask you a few questions."
• (Stanley Ipkiss) "Really? About what?"
• (Amy Yasbeck) "Ripley Auto Finishing. You're a customer of theirs, aren't you?"
• (Stanley Ipkiss) "Me? No. I don't even have a car. You know, 'cause they pollute."
• (Amy Yasbeck) "You don't own an '89 Civic?"
• (Stanley Ipkiss) "Oh, that car, yeah. Yeah. It's all coming back to me."

• (Amy Yasbeck) "I'm with the Evening Star. Can you tell me what happened here?"
• (Lieutenant Mitch Kellaway) "No, and you can quote me."
• (Amy Yasbeck) "Well, it looks like some sort of Mob tactic."
• (Lieutenant Mitch Kellaway) "There it is, boys, she broke the case. Come on, get these rubbernecks out of here."

• (Amy Yasbeck) "You said you wouldn't hurt him."
• (Dorian Tyrell) "I lied."

Jim Carrey as The Mask

• (Jim Carrey) "It's party time. P, A, R, T. Y? Because I gotta."

• (Jim Carrey) "SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSMOKIN'."

• (Jim Carrey) "You were good, kid, real good. But as long as I'm around, you'll always be second best, see?"

• (Bobby the Bouncer) "Uh, are you on the list?"
• (Jim Carrey) "Noooo. But I believe my friends are. Perhaps you know them."
• (Jim Carrey) "Franklin, Grant, and -- Jackson?"

• (Jim Carrey) "You were good kid, real good. But as long as I'm around, you'll always be second best, see?"

• (Jim Carrey) "Hello, Cherie. We meet again. Is it fate? Is it meant to be? Is it written in the stars that we are destined to fraternize?"
• (Jim Carrey) "I'd like to think so. Ha, ha ha."

• (Jim Carrey) "Hold on, Sugar. Daddy's got a sweet tooth tonight."

• (Jim Carrey) "Look, Ma. I'm road kill. Ha, ha, ha."

• (Jim Carrey) "THAT'S A SPICY MEATBALL."

• (Jim Carrey) "Look Ma, I'm roadkill."

• (Jim Carrey) "Ooh, somebody stop me."

• (Lieutenant Mitch Kellaway) "Ipkiss. Police. Freeze."
• (Lieutenant Mitch Kellaway) "Put your hands up."
• (Jim Carrey) "But you told me to freeze."
• (Lieutenant Mitch Kellaway) "All right, all right. Un-freeze."
• (Lieutenant Mitch Kellaway) "You're under arrest."
• (Jim Carrey) "No. It wasn't me. It was the One-Armed Man."
• (Jim Carrey) "All right, I confess. I did it, ya hear? And I'm glad. GLAD, I TELL YA."
• (Jim Carrey) "What are they gonna do to me, Sarge? WHAT ARE THEY GONNA DO?"
• (Lieutenant Mitch Kellaway) "Sorry, son. That's not my department. Search him."
• (Jim Carrey) "Ow. Where's a cam-corder when you need one?"

• (Jim Carrey) "And now, like Napoleon, I will divide and conquer."
• (Lieutenant Mitch Kellaway) "Ipkiss. Police."
• (Jim Carrey) "Merde."

• (Dorian Tyrell) "Okay, Twinkle Toes. I want to know where my money is, and I want to know right now."
• (Jim Carrey) "Okay"
• (Jim Carrey) "You've got 17.5% in T-bills amortized over the fiscal year, 8% in stocks and bonds. Carry the 9, divide by the Gross National Product -- fortunately, funeral bouquets are deductible."
• (Dorian Tyrell) "Ice this deadbeat."

• (Alley Punk #1) "Hey, mister. You got the time?"
• (Jim Carrey) "As a matter of fact I do, Cubby."
• (Jim Carrey) "LOOK AT THAT. It's exactly two seconds before I honk your nose and pull your underwear over your head."

• (Jim Carrey) "You gotta ask yourself one question. "Do I feel lucky?" Well, do ya? Punks."

• (Jim Carrey) "Did you miss me?"
• (Jim Carrey) "I GUESS NOT."

• (Jim Carrey) "Hold me closer, Ed, it's getting dark."
• (Jim Carrey) "Tell Auntie Em to let Old Yeller out."
• (Jim Carrey) "Tell Tiny Tim I won't be coming home this Christmas"
• (Jim Carrey) "Tell Scarlett I do give a damn."
• (Jim Carrey) "Pardon me."
• (Jim Carrey) "Thank you, you love me, you really love me."

• (Jim Carrey) "Kiss me, my dear, and I will reveal my croissant. I will spread your pate. I will dip my ladle in your vichyssoise."
• (Jim Carrey) "She is so coy."
• (Jim Carrey) "I love it."

• (Jim Carrey) "Sorry, wrong pocket."

• (Jim Carrey) "Our love is like a red, red rose -- and I am a little thorny."

• (Jim Carrey) "Hold on to your lugnuts, it's tiiiiime for an overhaul."

Reg E. Cathey as Freeze

• (Reg E. Cathey) "I do have one question."
• (Dorian Tyrell) "Which is?"
• (Reg E. Cathey) "What does Niko have to say about this?"
• (Dorian Tyrell) "Nothin' -- this ain't his grift."
• (Reg E. Cathey) "Get real man, everything is his grift. He owns you, he owns this -- club he owns this whole stink' town."
• (Dorian Tyrell) "Things change"
• (Dorian Tyrell) "."
• (Reg E. Cathey) "You mess with Niko you end up takin' a dirt nap."

• (Dorian Tyrell) "What happened?"
• (Reg E. Cathey) "Someone hit the joint before we could."
• (Dorian Tyrell) "Here, suck on that."

Nancy Fish as Mrs. Peenman

• (Nancy Fish) "Ipkiss, do you have any idea what time it is?"
• (Stanley Ipkiss) "Actually, no."
• (Nancy Fish) "My new carpet. Well, this is coming right out of your security deposit, Ipkiss."
• (Stanley Ipkiss) "You know, Mrs. Peenman --"
• (Nancy Fish) "What?"
• (Stanley Ipkiss) "Nothing."
• (Nancy Fish) "Well, that's what you are, Ipkiss, a big nothing."
• (Stanley Ipkiss) "Aren't you due back at the lab to have your bolts tightened?"

• (Nancy Fish) "Ipkiss, turn down those cartoons."
• (Stanley Ipkiss) "All right, Mrs. PeenMAN."

Richard Jeni as Charlie Schumacher

• (Richard Jeni) "A girl like that is always looking for the BBD: Bigger Better Deal."
• (Stanley Ipkiss) "You don't know that, Charlie. She's an artist. She's -- she's sensitive."
• (Richard Jeni) "Stanley, forget her. That girl will tear your heart out, put it in a blender and hit "frappe." You don't need her, man. You need somebody a little more down to earth. Somebody with some integrity. Somebody with"
• (Richard Jeni) "red hair and full pouty lips, a white blouse, a green jacket and a name tag."
• (Stanley Ipkiss) "Boy, you really narrowed it down."

• (Richard Jeni) "The Coco Bongo Club. Hottest new joint in town. Only the creme de la creme need apply."
• (Stanley Ipkiss) "So how do we get in?"

• (Richard Jeni) "Stanley, you are the nicest guy. Really, you are."
• (Stanley Ipkiss) "Yeah?"
• (Richard Jeni) "Charlie, isn't Stanley the nicest guy?"
• (Richard Jeni) "The best."
• (Richard Jeni) "That was THE most sickening display I've ever seen."
• (Stanley Ipkiss) "I disagree. I think I'm wearing her down."

• (Richard Jeni) "Genius. That was genius. Buddy, I have chills. What side of whose bed did you wake up on, man?"

• (Richard Jeni) "Officers, arrest those men. I always wanted to say that."

• (Stanley Ipkiss) "You sure you're not gonna miss this guy? Once he's gone, all that's left is me."
• (Richard Jeni) "MILO."
• (Stanley Ipkiss) "SSSMOKIN'."

• (Richard Jeni) "Gee, I wish MY daddy owned a bank. Then I could be a rich little creep too."

Ben Stein as Dr. Arthur Neuman

• (Ben Stein) "I'm talking about the mythology, Mr. Ipkiss. This is a piece of wood."

• (Ben Stein) "We all wear masks -- metaphorically speaking."

Jim Doughan as Doyle

• (Jim Doughan) "You got any pickle relish?"
• (Lieutenant Mitch Kellaway) "Doyle, get in the car."
• (Jim Doughan) "But I ordered onion rings."
• (Lieutenant Mitch Kellaway) "Doyle."

• (Jim Doughan) "I missed 'em."
• (Lieutenant Mitch Kellaway) "C'mon -- we all missed 'em."

• (Mayor Mitchell Tilton) "I want to see you in my office first thing tomorrow morning."
• (Lieutenant Mitch Kellaway) "Yes, your honor."
• (Jim Doughan) "That doesn't sound good at all."
• (Lieutenant Mitch Kellaway) "No, it doesn't sound good. What would sound good to you?"
• (Jim Doughan) "Breakfast."
• (Lieutenant Mitch Kellaway) "SHUT UP."

• (Jim Doughan) "Really big sunglasses."
• (Park Policeman) "Bike horn."
• (Jim Doughan) "Small mouth bass"
• (Park Policeman) "Bowling Pin"
• (Jim Doughan) "Mouse Trap."
• (Park Policeman) "Rubber Chicken."
• (Jim Carrey) "A little to the left -- that's it."
• (Jim Doughan) "mmmm, I don't know. Funny eyeball glasses?"
• (Jim Carrey) "I've never seen those before in my life."
• (Park Policeman) "Bazooka?"
• (Jim Carrey) "I have a permit for that."
• (Jim Doughan) "Picture of Kellaway's wife."
• (Lieutenant Mitch Kellaway) "What?"
• (Jim Carrey) "Uh-oh."
• (Lieutenant Mitch Kellaway) "Margaret."
• (Jim Carrey) "Geez I thought you would have a sense of humor. After all; you married her."
• (Jim Carrey) "That's gotta hurt."
• (Lieutenant Mitch Kellaway) "Get'em."
• (Lieutenant Mitch Kellaway) "Doyle."

Eamonn Roche as Mr. Dickey

• (Eamonn Roche) "Ipkiss, we have a crisis on our hands here and you stroll in over an hour late? If I have to put up with your slovenly behavior --"
• (Stanley Ipkiss) "BACK OFF, Monkey Boy, before I tell your daddy you're running this place like it's your own personal piggy bank. Or maybe we should call the IRS, and see if we can arrange a little vacation for you at Club FED."
• (Eamonn Roche) "That'll be all, Ipkiss."

Orestes Matacena as Niko

• (Unnamed) "120 yards."
• (Orestes Matacena) "Hello, Dorian. Thanks for dropping by."
• (Dorian Tyrell) "Well, next time why don't you call, all right? Leave the delivery boys at home."
• (Orestes Matacena) "The cops, ah -- tried to shut the club down this morning. They say you've been using the place to run your own small-time scams. I hear things like that, and I start losing my concentration. And my game, it goes straight to HELL."
• (Orestes Matacena) "You could, too."
• (Dorian Tyrell) "Ahh."
• (Unnamed) "205 yards."
• (Orestes Matacena) "I'm fed up with you, Dorian. But I'm gonna cut you a break. One week to get out of town."
• (Orestes Matacena) "After that, I'll use your empty little skull to break in my new 9-iron."

Denis Forest as Eddy

• (Dorian Tyrell) "Stanley. Tell me. How's this mask work?"
• (Stanley Ipkiss) "I don't know. You just put it on."
• (Denis Forest) "Boss. You better be carefull, huh?"
• (Dorian Tyrell) "What a rush."
• (Denis Forest) "Wow, boss. You're okay?"
• (Dorian Tyrell) "Better than ever, you idiot."
• (Denis Forest) "What do we do with Ipkiss?"
• (Dorian Tyrell) "The police are looking for The Mask. So, we'll give them The Mask."

• (Denis Forest) "The money better be here, Ipkiss. Or you're gonna "Ipkiss" your ass goodbye."

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