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The Beautician and the Beast Quotes

The Beautician and the Beast is a TV program that first aired in 1970 . The Beautician and the Beast completed its run in 1970.

It features Todd Graff, and Hawk Koch as producer, Cliff Eidelman in charge of musical score, and Peter Lyons Collister as head of cinematography.

The Beautician and the Beast is recorded in English and originally aired in United States. Each episode of The Beautician and the Beast is 107 minutes long. The Beautician and the Beast is distributed by Paramount Pictures.

The cast includes: Fran Drescher as Joy Miller, Patrick Malahide as Kleist, Ian McNeice as Grushinsky, Timothy Dalton as Boris Pochenko, and Phyllis Newman as Judy Miller.

The Beautician and the Beast Quotes

Ian McNeice as Grushinsky

  • (Ian McNeice) "I thought you teach science."
  • (Fran Drescher) "TEACH it? I didn't even PASS it."
  • (Ian McNeice) "Oh, you Americans and your positive thinking. There are some situations that a big toothed person cannot get you out of."

Fran Drescher as Joy Miller

  • (Fran Drescher) "Oh honey, talk to the hand, the ears ain't listening."
  • (Fran Drescher) "It's control-top pantyhose. Holds you in like a stuffed sausage."
  • (Fran Drescher) "It's like Paris 50 years ago."
  • (Phyllis Newman) "There were Nazis in Paris 50 years ago."
  • (Fran Drescher) "Who are you and what did you do with the little Nazi kid?"
  • (Fran Drescher) "OK, a lot of great men had mustaches. Hitler, Franco --"
  • (Timothy Dalton) "Einstein."
  • (Fran Drescher) "Oh, and that's who you wanna look like?"
  • (Fran Drescher) "In our country we can marry who we want. I decided on John Kennedy Jr., and while he's in denial, I'll travel."
  • (Fran Drescher) "Could I possibly get a blanket without a head?"
  • (Fran Drescher) "What are you doing?"
  • (Timothy Dalton) "You do not understand"
  • (Fran Drescher) "Oh no? You have the temper of an eight year old, your own children are scared to DEATH of you. And you hit girls. Tell me when I'm getting warm."
  • (Timothy Dalton) "This whole thing is none of your business."
  • (Fran Drescher) "You know maybe you're right. Because even if you can't see that doing the right thing even when you have nothing to gain, is what makes you -- a mench, and decent, and civilized. I can't have anything to do with you"
  • (Timothy Dalton) "They boy will remain in prison, it's none of your business"
  • (Fran Drescher) "You know everyone is right about you -- you are a beast --"
  • (Fran Drescher) "Flashy, not trashy."

Patrick Malahide as Kleist

  • (Patrick Malahide) "In Slovetzia, hard work today, happiness tomorrow."

Timothy Dalton as Boris Pochenko

  • (Timothy Dalton) "Oh my, call an ambulance. She doesn't know what to say."
  • (Timothy Dalton) "Hello how are you?"
  • (Timothy Dalton) "I killed a cow right over there."
  • (Timothy Dalton) "It was very nice meeting you."
  • (Timothy Dalton) "I don't know where anything is in this kitchen"
  • (Fran Drescher) "Oh come on, I can find food in Ghandi's house, are you kidding me?"
  • (Timothy Dalton) "What a nice man that hermit was. I didn't even know I had a hermit."

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