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Spaceballs Quotes

Spaceballs is a television program that was first aired in 1970 . Spaceballs ended its run in 1970.

It features Mel Brooks as producer, John Morris (composer) in charge of musical score, and Nick McLean as head of cinematography.

Spaceballs is recorded in English and originally aired in United States. Each episode of Spaceballs is 96 minutes long. Spaceballs is distributed by Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer.

The cast includes: George Wyner as Colonel Sandurz, Rick Moranis as Dark Helmet, Jim Jackman as Major Asshole, Bill Pullman as Lone Starr, Dick Van Patten as Roland, Lorene Yarnell as Dot Matrix, Ronny Graham as Minister, Daphne Zuniga as Princess Vespa, Michael Winslow as Radar Technician, John Candy as Barf, Dick Van Patten as King Roland, Jim J. Bullock as Prince Valium, Mel Brooks as President Skroob, Rudy De Luca as Vinnie, Leslie Bevis as Commanderette Zircon, and Sandy Helberg as Dr. Schlotkin.

Spaceballs Quotes

John Candy as Barf

  • (John Candy) "They must've overshot us by about a week."
  • (Pizza the Hutt) "Well, if it isn't Lone Starr. And his sidekick, Puke."
  • (John Candy) "That's Barf."
  • (Pizza the Hutt) "Barf -- Puke -- Whatever."
  • (John Candy) "The minute we move in they're gonna spot us on their radar."
  • (Bill Pullman) "Nuh-uh."
  • (John Candy) "Uh-huh."
  • (Bill Pullman) "Nuh-uh."
  • (John Candy) "Uh-uh."
  • (Bill Pullman) "Nuh-uh. Not if we jam it."
  • (John Candy) "Aha. You're right."
  • (Bill Pullman) "Down scope."
  • (John Candy) "Down scope."
  • (John Candy) "Radar about to be "jammed.""
  • (John Candy) "Oh. That's gonna leave a mark."
  • (John Candy) "It's not that we're afraid, far from it, it's just that we've got this thing about death -- It's not us."
  • (John Candy) "(reacting to the guards being shot by Princess Vespa) HOLY s***."
  • (Daphne Zuniga) "How was that?"
  • (Bill Pullman) "Not bad."
  • (John Candy) "Not bad -- for a girl."
  • (Lorene Yarnell) "Hey that was pretty good for RAMBO."
  • (Yogurt) "I am the keeper of a greater magic, a power known throughout the universe -- as the --"
  • (John Candy) "-- the Force?"
  • (Yogurt) "No, the Schwartz."
  • (John Candy) "Abandon ship. Abandon ship. Women and mogs first."
  • (John Candy) "Chief -- I can't -- I can't go any further. I can't go any further."
  • (Bill Pullman) "Just one more dune to go."
  • (John Candy) "That's what you said three dunes ago. I got no more left. Oh, waiter -- cheque please."
  • (Bill Pullman) "Must go on -- MUST GO ON. Must go on --"
  • (Bill Pullman) "Who am I kidding?"
  • (John Candy) "I'm a mog: half man, half dog. I'm my own best friend."

Rick Moranis as Dark Helmet

  • (Rick Moranis) "Yogurt. Yogurt. I hate Yogurt. Even with Strawberries."
  • (Rick Moranis) "I can't breathe in this thing."
  • (George Wyner) "We're approaching Planet Druidia, sir."
  • (Rick Moranis) "Good. I'll call Spaceball City and notify President Skroob immediately."
  • (Radio Operator) "I already called him, sir. He knows everything."
  • (Rick Moranis) "What? You went over my helmet?"
  • (Radio Operator) "Well not exactly over, sir -- more to the side; I'll always call you first, it will never happen again, never, ever."
  • (Radio Operator) "Oh, s***. No, no, no. No, please, please, no."
  • (Radio Operator) "Not that."
  • (Rick Moranis) "Yes, that."
  • (Rick Moranis) "We've passed them. Stop this thing."
  • (George Wyner) "We can't stop, it's too dangerous. We have to slow down first."
  • (Rick Moranis) "BULLs***. Just stop this thing. I order you, STOP."
  • (Rick Moranis) "What did you do?"
  • (George Wyner) "I turned off the wall."
  • (Rick Moranis) "No, you didnt. You turned off the whole movie."
  • (George Wyner) "I must have pressed the wrong button."
  • (Rick Moranis) "Well, put it back on."
  • (Rick Moranis) "Give me that, you petty excuse for an officer."
  • (Rick Moranis) "Say goodbye to your two best friends, and I don't mean your pals in the Winnebago."
  • (Rick Moranis) "Out of order? f***. Even in the future nothing works."
  • (Rick Moranis) "Very impressive, Lone Starr. Too bad this isn't the Wild World of Sports."
  • (Rick Moranis) "Hey, hey, hey. That's my escape pod. Who are you?"
  • (Bearded Lady) "I am the Bearded Lady. What are you? One of the freaks?"
  • (Rick Moranis) "Hey, hey. Come back. That's my pod. No."
  • (Rick Moranis) "Come back, you fat bearded bitch."
  • (Rick Moranis) "So, Lone Starr. Yogurt has taught you well. If there's one thing I despise, it is a fair fight. But if I must, then I must. May the best man win. Put 'er there."
  • (Rick Moranis) "The Ring. I can't believe you fell for the oldest trick in the book. What a goof. What's with you man? Come on. You know what? Here let me give it back to you."
  • (Rick Moranis) "Oh, look, you fell for that too. I can't believe it, man."
  • (Rick Moranis) "Raspberry. There's only one man who would dare give me the raspberry: Lone Starr."
  • (Rick Moranis) "Ah, planet Druidia. And under that air shield, ten thousand years of fresh air. We must get through that air shield."
  • (George Wyner) "We will, sir. Once we kidnap the princess, we can force her father, King Roland, to give us the combination to the air shild, thereby destroying Planet Druidia and saving Planet Spaceballs."
  • (Rick Moranis) "Everybody got that?"
  • (Rick Moranis) "Good. When will the princess be married?"
  • (George Wyner) "Within an hour, sir."
  • (Rick Moranis) "Well I hope it's a long ceremony, 'cause it's gonne be a short honeymoon."
  • (Rick Moranis) "Prepare to attack. On the count of three. One -- two --"
  • (Rick Moranis) "WAIT. What happened? Where are they?"
  • (George Wyner) "I don't know sir. They must have hyperjets on that thing."
  • (Rick Moranis) "AND WHAT HAVE WE GOT ON THIS THING, A CUISINART ?"
  • (Rick Moranis) "I bet she gives great helmet."
  • (Rick Moranis) "So, Princess Vespa, at last I have you in my clutches, to have my way with you, the way I want to."
  • (Rick Moranis) "No, no, please leave me alone."
  • (Rick Moranis) "No, you are mine."
  • (Rick Moranis) "Not so fast, Helmet."
  • (Rick Moranis) "Lone Starr."
  • (Rick Moranis) "Yes, its me. I'm here to save my girlfriend. Hi, honey."
  • (Rick Moranis) "Now you are going to die. BAM."
  • (Rick Moranis) "Oh, oh -- OH."
  • (Rick Moranis) "Hey, what did you do to my friend?"
  • (Rick Moranis) "The same thing I'm going to do to you, big boy."
  • (Rick Moranis) "OH. OH."
  • (Rick Moranis) "And you too."
  • (Rick Moranis) "Owww. Ah."
  • (Rick Moranis) "Now Princess Vespa, at last we are alone."
  • (Rick Moranis) "Oh, oh, I hate you I hate you I hate you leave me alone.; yet, I find you strangely attractive."
  • (Rick Moranis) "Of course you do. Druish princesses are often attracted to money, and power, and I have BOTH, and YOU KNOW IT."
  • (Rick Moranis) "Oh, oh, leave me alone."
  • (Rick Moranis) "No, kiss me."
  • (Rick Moranis) "Oh, oh, no, yes, no, NO, yes, ah, ah, ah ahhhhh -- oh, your helmet is so big --"
  • (Rick Moranis) "What's the matter with this thing, what's all that churnning and bubbling, you call that radar screen?"
  • (George Wyner) "No, sir. We call it,"
  • (George Wyner) "Mr Coffee. Care for some?"
  • (Rick Moranis) "Yes. I always have my coffee when I watch radar, you know that."
  • (George Wyner) "Of course I do, sir."
  • (Rick Moranis) "Everybody knows that."
  • (Unnamed) "Of course we do, sir."
  • (Rick Moranis) "s***. I hate it when I get my Schwartz twisted."
  • (Rick Moranis) "Ummmm -- He did it."
  • (Bill Pullman) "What?"
  • (Rick Moranis) "What's the matter, Colonel Sandurz? CHICKEN?"
  • (Rick Moranis) "Now what is it?"
  • (Michael Winslow) "I'm having trouble with the radar, sir."
  • (Rick Moranis) "What's wrong with it?"
  • (Michael Winslow) "I've lost the bleeps, I've lost the sweeps, and I've lost the creeps."
  • (Rick Moranis) "The what?"
  • (George Wyner) "The what?"
  • (Rick Moranis) "And the what?"
  • (Michael Winslow) "You know. The bleeps."
  • (Michael Winslow) "The sweeps."
  • (Michael Winslow) "And the creeps."
  • (Rick Moranis) "That's not all he's lost."
  • (Rick Moranis) "WHAT? You went over my helmet?"
  • (Rick Moranis) "Hey hey hey. That's my escape pod. Who are you?"
  • (Bearded Lady) "I'm the bearded lady. Who are you, one of the freaks?"
  • (Rick Moranis) "Wait, wait. No."
  • (Rick Moranis) "Come back you fat bearded bitch."
  • (Rick Moranis) "No, no, no. Go past this. Pass this part. In fact, never play this again."
  • (Rick Moranis) "My brains are going into my feet."
  • (Rick Moranis) "So, Lone Starr, now you see that evil will always triumph because good is dumb."
  • (Rick Moranis) "Before you die there is something you should know about us, Lone Starr."
  • (Bill Pullman) "What?"
  • (Rick Moranis) "I am your father's brother's nephew's cousin's former roommate."
  • (Bill Pullman) "What's that make us?"
  • (Rick Moranis) "Absolutely nothing. Which is what you are about to become."
  • (Rick Moranis) "Schlotkin."
  • (Sandy Helberg) "What?"
  • (Rick Moranis) "We're done with you. Go back to the golf course and work on your putz."

Lorene Yarnell as Dot Matrix

  • (Lorene Yarnell) "Hey wait, you forgot to get married."
  • (Lorene Yarnell) "Well, goodbye virgin alarm."
  • (Lorene Yarnell) "Hey, stop looking up my can."
  • (John Candy) "Sorry."
  • (Lorene Yarnell) "What'll we do?"
  • (Bill Pullman) "We've got to act fast. Step one, we reverse the vacuum and blow the air back onto the planet. Step two, we destroy that thing."
  • (Daphne Zuniga) "But isn't that dangerous?"
  • (Bill Pullman) "Extremely. Plus, I don't know how the hell we're gonna do it."
  • (Lorene Yarnell) ""Ooh, I hate these movies."

Mel Brooks as President Skroob

  • (Mel Brooks) "Did it work? Where's the king?"
  • (Rick Moranis) "It worked, sir. We have the combination."
  • (Mel Brooks) "Great. Now we can take every last breath of fresh air from Planet Druidia. What's the combination?"
  • (George Wyner) "1-2-3-4-5"
  • (Mel Brooks) "1-2-3-4-5?"
  • (George Wyner) "Yes."
  • (Mel Brooks) "That's amazing. I've got the same combination on my luggage."
  • (Mel Brooks) "The ship is too big. If I walk, the movie will be over."
  • (Mel Brooks) "Never have that damn thing down in front of me. How I do I know you're not making faces at me under that thing?"
  • (Self-Destruct Voice) "This ship will self-destruct in twenty seconds. This is your last chance to push the cancellation button."
  • (Mel Brooks) "Cancellation button? HURRY."
  • (Self-Destruct Voice) "Ten -- nine -- eight -- six --"
  • (Mel Brooks) "Six? What happened to seven?"
  • (Self-Destruct Voice) "Just kidding."
  • (Self-Destruct Voice) "Six -- five -- four -- three -- two -- one --"
  • (Self-Destruct Voice) "Have a nice day."
  • (Rick Moranis) "Thank you."
  • (Mel Brooks) "Why didn't anybody tell me my ass was this big?"
  • (Marlene) "Hello, President Skroob."
  • (Mel Brooks) "Hello, Charlene."
  • (Marlene) "I'm Marlene."
  • (Mel Brooks) "Hello, Marlene."
  • (Charlene) "I'm Charlene."
  • (Mel Brooks) "Chew your gum."
  • (Mel Brooks) "One pod left and three of us and I'm the President. Well, boys, it's a very lovely ship. I think you should go down with it."
  • (Mel Brooks) "Ah, Planet Druidia, and ten thousand years of fresh air."
  • (Rick Moranis) "The way he runs things, it won't last a hundred."
  • (Mel Brooks) "As president of Planet Spaceball, I can assure both you and your viewers that there's absolutely no air shortage whatsoever. Yes, of course. I've heard the same rumor myself. Yes, thanks for calling and not reversing the charges. Bye."
  • (Mel Brooks) "s***head."
  • (Mel Brooks) "Hey, get out of there. Where do you think you're going?"
  • (Unnamed) "Pizza to go. Ha ha ha."
  • (Mel Brooks) "Sandurz, Sandurz. You got to help me. I don't know what to do. I can't make decisions. I'm a president."

Daphne Zuniga as Princess Vespa

  • (Daphne Zuniga) "Which one's yours?"
  • (Bill Pullman) "Who knows?"
  • (Daphne Zuniga) "You don't know where you're from?"
  • (Bill Pullman) "Not really. I was found on the doorstep of a monastery."
  • (Daphne Zuniga) "A monastery? Where?"
  • (Bill Pullman) "Somewhere in the Ford Galaxy."
  • (Daphne Zuniga) "Who are you?"
  • (John Candy) "Barf."
  • (Lorene Yarnell) "Not in here, mister. This is a Mercedes."
  • (Daphne Zuniga) "What is this place?"
  • (John Candy) "It looks like the Temple of Doom."
  • (Lorene Yarnell) "Well it sure ain't Temple Beth Israel."
  • (Daphne Zuniga) "Nobody knows --"
  • (Bill Pullman) "It's coming from there."
  • (John Candy) "That can't be her."
  • (Daphne Zuniga) "-- the trouble I've seen --"
  • (Daphne Zuniga) "Nobody knows but Jesus."
  • (Bill Pullman) "It's her."
  • (Daphne Zuniga) "Nobody knows the trouble I've seen."
  • (John Candy) "She's a bass."
  • (Daphne Zuniga) "I really must go back. I shouldn't have run away. I realize now that love is one luxury a princess cannot afford."
  • (Bill Pullman) "You're probably right."
  • (Daphne Zuniga) "I know now that I must learn to live without love."
  • (Bill Pullman) "I guess so."
  • (Daphne Zuniga) "Besides, love isn't that important."
  • (Bill Pullman) "Nah -- It never was."
  • (Daphne Zuniga) "I could be perfectly happy the rest of my life without --"
  • (Daphne Zuniga) "love."
  • (Bill Pullman) "Sure you could."
  • (Daphne Zuniga) "Without physical contact."
  • (Bill Pullman) "Yeah."
  • (Daphne Zuniga) "Without being held."
  • (Bill Pullman) "Yeah."
  • (Daphne Zuniga) "Or kissed --"
  • (Daphne Zuniga) "Now listen you --"
  • (Bill Pullman) "You listen. On this ship, you're to refer to me as 'idiot', not 'you captain'. I mean, you know what I mean."
  • (Daphne Zuniga) "And you will not call me 'you'. You will never address me as 'you'. You will call me 'your royal highness'."
  • (Bill Pullman) "You are royal pain in the --"
  • (John Candy) "Whoa, hold it, time."
  • (Daphne Zuniga) "Hey. I don't have to put up with this. I'm rich."
  • (Daphne Zuniga) "I ain't shooting this thing, I hate guns."
  • (Daphne Zuniga) "My hair, he shot my hair. Son of a bitch."
  • (Daphne Zuniga) "I am Princess Vespa, daughter of Roland, King of the Druids."
  • (Bill Pullman) "Oh great. That's all we needed. A Druish princess."
  • (John Candy) "Funny, she doesn't look Druish."
  • (Daphne Zuniga) "Ha, didn't even stay for the wedding. Just took his million spacebucks and ran."
  • (Dick Van Patten) "He didn't take the million --"
  • (Daphne Zuniga) "What's going on?"
  • (Lorene Yarnell) "It's either the 4th of July, or someone's trying to kill us."

Bill Pullman as Lone Starr

  • (Bill Pullman) "We gotta get moving before dawn."
  • (John Candy) "Why so early?"
  • (Bill Pullman) "Because we're in the middle of a desert and we're not going to get very far once that blazing sun gets overhead."
  • (John Candy) "Nice dissolve."
  • (Megamaid Guard) "What the hell are you doing?"
  • (Bill Pullman) "The Vulcan neck pinch?"
  • (Megamaid Guard) "No, no, no, stupid, you've got it much too high. It's down here where the shoulder meets the neck."
  • (Bill Pullman) "Like this?"
  • (Megamaid Guard) "Yeah."
  • (Bill Pullman) "Thanks."
  • (Yogurt) "Use the Schwartz, Lone Starr. Use the Schwartz."
  • (Bill Pullman) "I can't; I lost the ring."
  • (Yogurt) "Forget the ring. The ring is bupkis. I found it in a Cracker Jack box."
  • (Bill Pullman) "What the hell was that noise?"
  • (Lorene Yarnell) "That was my virgin-alarm. It's programmed to go off before you do."
  • (Bill Pullman) "A million? That's unfair."
  • (Pizza the Hutt) "Unfair to payor but not to payee. But you're gonna pay it, or else."
  • (John Candy) "Or else what?"
  • (Pizza the Hutt) "Tell him, Vinnie."
  • (Rudy De Luca) "Or else Pizza is gonna send out for you."
  • (Bill Pullman) "Checking in? What the hell is all that?"
  • (John Candy) "Ith her oyal igness' atched uggage."
  • (Bill Pullman) "What?"
  • (John Candy) "Her royal highness' matched luggage."
  • (Bill Pullman) "Matched luggage? What does she think this is, a princess cruise?"
  • (Bill Pullman) "Who hasn't heard of Yogurt."
  • (Daphne Zuniga) "Yogurt the Wise."
  • (Lorene Yarnell) "Yogurt the All-Powerful."
  • (John Candy) "Yogurt the Magnificent."
  • (Yogurt) "Please, please, don't make a fuss. I'm just plain Yogurt."
  • (Bill Pullman) "Called me an idiot. I'm going back there and explain a few things to her."
  • (Lorene Yarnell) "Besides he got a sexy voice. He might be cute."
  • (John Candy) "Wait. You haven't seen what she looks like."
  • (Bill Pullman) "I know what she looks like. You've seen one princess, you've seen them all."
  • (Daphne Zuniga) "Cute? I know these space bums, they're all alike. Fat, ugly --"
  • (Bill Pullman) "Buck-toothed, knock-kneed --"
  • (Daphne Zuniga) "Beer-swilling pigs."
  • (Bill Pullman) "Horse-faced space dogs."
  • (Bill Pullman) "I wonder, will we ever see each other again?"
  • (Yogurt) "Who knows? God willing, we'll all meet again in Spaceballs 2: The Search for More Money."
  • (Bill Pullman) "I still don't understand how I'm going to lift that big statue with this little ring."
  • (Yogurt) "Never underestimate the power of the Schwartz."
  • (Bill Pullman) "Well, what have we got here? Will you look at her? Those flashing eyes, those flushed cheeks, those trembling lips. You know something Princess? You are ugly when you're angry."
  • (Bill Pullman) "Did I miss something? When did we get to Disneyland?"
  • (Bill Pullman) "Helmet. So, at last we meet for the first time for the last time."

Leslie Bevis as Commanderette Zircon

  • (Leslie Bevis) "President Skroob."
  • (Mel Brooks) "Ahh. I told you never to call me on this wall. This is an unlisted wall."
  • (Leslie Bevis) "Snotty; beam him down."
  • (Snotty) "Yes sir. Immediately, sir."
  • (Leslie Bevis) "President Skroob. Salute."
  • (Unnamed) "Hail Skroob."
  • (Leslie Bevis) "Shall I have Snotty beam you down, sir?"
  • (Mel Brooks) "I don't know about this beaming stuff? Is it safe?"
  • (Leslie Bevis) "Oh yes, sir. Snotty beamed me twice last night. It was wonderful."

Ronny Graham as Minister

  • (Ronny Graham) "Do you?"
  • (Bill Pullman) "Yes"
  • (Ronny Graham) "Do you?"
  • (Daphne Zuniga) "Yes"
  • (Ronny Graham) "GOOD, you're married. KISS HER."
  • (Ronny Graham) "What's your name?"
  • (John Candy) "Barf."
  • (Ronny Graham) "Your full name?"
  • (John Candy) "Barfolomew."
  • (Ronny Graham) "Excuse me. I'm trying to conduct a wedding here which has nothing to do with love, so please be quiet."
  • (Daphne Zuniga) "I'm sorry."
  • (Dick Van Patten) "I'm sorry"
  • (Jim J. Bullock) "I'm sorry too."
  • (Ronny Graham) "Don't be sorry, be quiet."
  • (Jim J. Bullock) "I'm sorry."
  • (Ronny Graham) "-- to join Princess Vespa and Prince Valium in the bonds of Holy --"
  • (Ronny Graham) "MOLY."

George Wyner as Colonel Sandurz

  • (George Wyner) "Lord Helmet."
  • (Rick Moranis) "WHAT?"
  • (George Wyner) "You're needed on the bridge sir."
  • (Rick Moranis) "Knock on my door. Knock next time."
  • (George Wyner) "Yes, sir."
  • (Rick Moranis) "Did you see anything?"
  • (George Wyner) "No, sir. I didn't see you playing with your dolls again."
  • (Rick Moranis) "GOOD."
  • (George Wyner) "Try here. Stop."
  • (Rick Moranis) "What the hell am I looking at? When does this happen in the movie?"
  • (George Wyner) "Now. You're looking at now, sir. Everything that happens now, is happening now."
  • (Rick Moranis) "What happened to then?"
  • (George Wyner) "We passed then."
  • (Rick Moranis) "When?"
  • (George Wyner) "Just now. We're at now now."
  • (Rick Moranis) "Go back to then."
  • (George Wyner) "When?"
  • (Rick Moranis) "Now."
  • (George Wyner) "Now?"
  • (Rick Moranis) "Now."
  • (George Wyner) "I can't."
  • (Rick Moranis) "Why?"
  • (George Wyner) "We missed it."
  • (Rick Moranis) "When?"
  • (George Wyner) "Just now."
  • (Rick Moranis) "When will then be now?"
  • (George Wyner) "Soon."
  • (Rick Moranis) "How soon?"
  • (Radio Operator) "Colonel Sandurz."
  • (George Wyner) "What is it, Sergeant Ricco?"
  • (Radio Operator) "You told me to let you know the moment Planet Druidia was in sight, sir."
  • (George Wyner) "So?"
  • (Radio Operator) "Planet Druidia's in sight, sir."
  • (George Wyner) "You're really a Spaceball. You know that, don't you?"
  • (Radio Operator) "Thanks, sir."
  • (George Wyner) "Are you alright sir?"
  • (Rick Moranis) "Fine. How've you been?"
  • (George Wyner) "Fine sir."
  • (Rick Moranis) "Good"
  • (George Wyner) "It's a good thing you were wearing that helmet."
  • (Rick Moranis) "Yeah."
  • (George Wyner) "What shall we do now, Sir?"
  • (Rick Moranis) "Well, are we stopped?"
  • (George Wyner) "We're stopped, Sir."
  • (Rick Moranis) "Good. Well why don't we take a five minute break?"
  • (George Wyner) "Very good, Sir."
  • (Rick Moranis) "Smoke if you got'em."
  • (George Wyner) "All personnel proceed to escape pods. Close down the circus. Evacuate the zoo. The self-destruct mechanism has been activated. Abandon ship."
  • (George Wyner) "That's much too early. Prepare to fast-forward."
  • (Video Operator) "Preparing to fast-forward."
  • (George Wyner) "Fast-forward."
  • (Video Operator) "Fast-forwarding, sir."
  • (George Wyner) "But sir, your ring. Don't you have the schwartz too?"
  • (Rick Moranis) "Nah, he got the upside, I got the downside. See there's two sides to every Schwartz."
  • (George Wyner) "Sir hadn't you better buckle up?"
  • (Rick Moranis) "Ah, buckle this. LUDICROUS SPEED. GO."
  • (George Wyner) "Prepare ship --"
  • (George Wyner) "Prepare ship for ludicrous speed. Fasten all seatbelts, seal all entrances and exits, close all shops in the mall, cancel the three ring circus, secure all animals in the zoo."

Michael Winslow as Radar Technician

  • (Michael Winslow) "Sir?"
  • (George Wyner) "What is it?"
  • (Michael Winslow) "Can I talk to you for a minute, please, sir?"
  • (George Wyner) "Well?"
  • (Michael Winslow) "I'm having trouble with the radar, sir."
  • (George Wyner) "You don't need that, private; we're right here. Now, what is it?"
  • (Michael Winslow) "I'm having trouble with the radar, sir."
  • (Rick Moranis) "Now, what is it?"

Dick Van Patten as King Roland

  • (Dick Van Patten) "One."
  • (Rick Moranis) "One."
  • (George Wyner) "One."
  • (Dick Van Patten) "Two."
  • (Rick Moranis) "Two."
  • (George Wyner) "Two."
  • (Dick Van Patten) "Three."
  • (Rick Moranis) "Three."
  • (George Wyner) "Three."
  • (Dick Van Patten) "Four."
  • (Rick Moranis) "Four."
  • (George Wyner) "Four."
  • (Dick Van Patten) "Five."
  • (Rick Moranis) "Five."
  • (George Wyner) "Five."
  • (Rick Moranis) "So the combination is -- one, two, three, four, five? That's the stupidest combination I've ever heard in my life. That's the kind of thing an idiot would have on his luggage."

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Bottom (TV series) Quotes | Whose Line Is It Anyway? (UK TV series) Quotes | Suspicion (1941 film) Quotes | My Darling Clementine Quotes | The Music Box Quotes | Morocco (film) Quotes | Modern Times (film) Quotes | The Miracle of Morgan's Creek Quotes | Meet Me in St. Louis Quotes | Manhattan (film) Quotes | Love Me Tonight Quotes | Love Finds Andy Hardy Quotes | The Living Desert Quotes | Little Fugitive (1953 film) Quotes | The Life and Times of Rosie the Riveter Quotes | The Life and Death of 9413: a Hollywood Extra Quotes | The Learning Tree Quotes | Laura (1944 film) Quotes | The Last Picture Show Quotes | The Last of the Mohicans (1920 American film) Quotes | Lassie Come Home Quotes | Lambchops (film) Quotes | The Lady Eve Quotes | Knute Rockne, All American Quotes | Killer of Sheep Quotes |