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Shaun of the Dead Quotes

Shaun of the Dead is a TV show that appeared on TV in 1970 . Shaun of the Dead stopped airing in 1970.

It features Nira Park as producer, Pete Woodhead, and Daniel Mudford in charge of musical score, and David M. Dunlap as head of cinematography.

Shaun of the Dead is recorded in English and originally aired in France, United Kingdom, and United States. Each episode of Shaun of the Dead is 99 minutes long. Shaun of the Dead is distributed by Universal Studios, and Rogue Pictures.

The cast includes: Simon Pegg as Shaun, Dylan Moran as David, Nick Frost as Ed, Kate Ashfield as Liz, Lucy Davis as Dianne, Peter Serafinowicz as Pete, Penelope Wilton as Barbara, Jessica Hynes as Yvonne, Bill Nighy as Philip, Rafe Spall as Noel, Martin Freeman as Declan, Reece Shearsmith as Mark, Tamsin Greig as Maggie, and Matt Lucas as Cousin Tom.

Shaun of the Dead Quotes

Nick Frost as Ed

  • (Nick Frost) "There's a girl in the garden."
  • (Simon Pegg) "What?"
  • (Nick Frost) "In the garden, there is a girl."
  • (Nick Frost) "Oh. Hello. Who's a pretty boy, then?"
  • (Nick Frost) "You didn't tell me Barbara had a Jag. I've always wanted to drive one of those."
  • (Simon Pegg) "Yeah, well, it's Philip's, okay? He won't let anybody near it. Honestly, I put half a Mars bar in the glove box once and he chased me around the garden with a bit of wood."
  • (Nick Frost) "Fuck. It's gorgeous."
  • (Nick Frost) "What happened to your hand, man?"
  • (Peter Serafinowicz) "I got mugged on the way home."
  • (Nick Frost) "By who?"
  • (Peter Serafinowicz) "I dunno by some crackheads or something, one of them bit me."
  • (Nick Frost) "Why'd they bite you?"
  • (Peter Serafinowicz) "I don't know, I didn't stop to ask them. Now, I have a splitting headache, and your stupid hip hop isn't helping. And the front door is open -- AGAIN."
  • (Nick Frost) "It's not hip hop, it's Electro. Prick -- Next time I see him, he's dead."
  • (Jeremy Thompson - Newsreader) "To recap, it is vital that you stay in your homes. Make no attempt to reach loved ones, and avoid all physical contact with the assailants."
  • (Nick Frost) "Do you believe everything you hear on TV?"
  • (Nick Frost) "'Purple Rain'?"
  • (Simon Pegg) "No."
  • (Nick Frost) "'Sign o' the Times'?"
  • (Simon Pegg) "Definitely not."
  • (Nick Frost) "The 'Batman' soundtrack?"
  • (Simon Pegg) "Throw it."
  • (Nick Frost) "'Dire Straits'?"
  • (Simon Pegg) "Throw it."
  • (Nick Frost) "Ooh, 'Stone Roses'."
  • (Simon Pegg) "Um, No."
  • (Nick Frost) "'Second Coming'."
  • (Simon Pegg) "I like it."
  • (Nick Frost) "Ahhh. 'Sade'."
  • (Simon Pegg) "Yeah, but that's Liz's."
  • (Nick Frost) "Yeah, but she did dump you."
  • (Simon Pegg) "Oh."
  • (Nick Frost) "Who the hell put this on?"
  • (Simon Pegg) "It's on random."
  • (Videogame Voice) "Player 2 has entered the game."
  • (Nick Frost) "Don't you have work?"
  • (Videogame Voice) "Player 2 has left the game."
  • (Nick Frost) "I've got nothing."
  • (Nick Frost) "You gonna thank me then?"
  • (Simon Pegg) "For what?"
  • (Nick Frost) "Tidying up."
  • (Simon Pegg) "Doesn't look that tidy."
  • (Nick Frost) "Well, I had a few beers when I finished."
  • (Nick Frost) "Shaun, what's going on?"
  • (Simon Pegg) "Shit, it's engaged."
  • (Nick Frost) "How about an ambulance?"
  • (Simon Pegg) "It's engaged, Ed."
  • (Nick Frost) "A fire engine?"
  • (Simon Pegg) "It's one number, Ed, and it's busy. Okay? What you want a fire engine for, anyway?"
  • (Nick Frost) "Anything with flashing lights, you know?"
  • (Nick Frost) "Why didn't you just shoot him, man?"
  • (Simon Pegg) "Ed, for the last time --"
  • (Nick Frost) "I fucking knew it."
  • (Nick Frost) "Do you want your messages?"
  • (Simon Pegg) "What?"
  • (Nick Frost) "Well, your mum rang about you going around tomorrow night, and then Liz rang about the two of you eating out tonight, and then your mum rang back to see if I wanted to eat her out tonight."
  • (Simon Pegg) "What ?"
  • (Nick Frost) "We're coming to get you, Barbara."
  • (Nick Frost) "Who died and made you fucking king of the zombies?"
  • (Nick Frost) "Any zombies out there?"
  • (Simon Pegg) "Don't say that."
  • (Nick Frost) "What?"
  • (Simon Pegg) "That."
  • (Nick Frost) "What?"
  • (Simon Pegg) "The zed-word. Don't say it."
  • (Nick Frost) "Why not?"
  • (Simon Pegg) "Because it's ridiculous."
  • (Nick Frost) "All right -- are there any out there, though?"
  • (Simon Pegg) "I can't see any. Maybe it's not as bad as all that."
  • (Simon Pegg) "Oh, no, there they are."
  • (Nick Frost) "See? You don't need Liz to have a good time."
  • (Simon Pegg) "Oh, don't, man."
  • (Nick Frost) "No. Go ahead, look at me. Can I just say one more thing? I'm not gonna say, you know, there's plenty more fish in the sea. I'm not going to say if you love her, let her go. And I'm not going to bombard you with clichés. But what I will say is this?"
  • (Nick Frost) "It's not the end of the world."
  • (Nick Frost) "What's the plan then?"
  • (Simon Pegg) "Right."
  • (Simon Pegg) "We take Pete's car, we drive over to Mum's, we go in, take care of Philip; "I'm so sorry, Philip"; then we grab Mum, we go over to Liz's place, hole up, have a cup of tea and wait for this whole thing to blow over."
  • (Nick Frost) "Why have we got to go to Liz's?"
  • (Simon Pegg) "Because we do."
  • (Nick Frost) "But she dumped you."
  • (Simon Pegg) "I have to know if she's all right."
  • (Nick Frost) "Why?"
  • (Simon Pegg) "Because I love her."
  • (Nick Frost) "All right -- gayyy -- I'm not staying there, though."
  • (Simon Pegg) "Why not?"
  • (Nick Frost) "If we hole up, I wanna be somewhere familiar, I wanna know where the exits are, and I wanna be allowed to smoke."
  • (Simon Pegg) "Okay."
  • (Simon Pegg) "We take Pete's car, go round Mum's, go in, deal with Philip; "Sorry, Philip."; grab Mum, go to Liz's, pick her up, bring her back here, have a cup of tea and wait for this whole thing to blow over."
  • (Nick Frost) "Perfect."
  • (Simon Pegg) "No, no, no, no, no, wait, we can't bring her back here."
  • (Nick Frost) "Why not?"
  • (Simon Pegg) "Well, it's not really safe, is it?"
  • (Nick Frost) "Yeah, look at the state of it."
  • (Simon Pegg) "Where's safe? Where's familiar?"
  • (Nick Frost) "Where can I smoke?"
  • (Simon Pegg) "Take car. Go to Mum's. Kill Phil; "Sorry."; grab Liz, go to the Winchester, have a nice cold pint, and wait for all of this to blow over. How's that for a slice of fried gold?"
  • (Nick Frost) "Yeah, boyyyeee."
  • (Nick Frost) "I'm sorry, Shaun."
  • (Simon Pegg) "It's OK."
  • (Nick Frost) "No, I'm sorry, Shaun."
  • (Simon Pegg) "What?"
  • (Simon Pegg) "Oh, God, that's rotten."
  • (Nick Frost) "I'll stop doing it when you stop laughing."
  • (Simon Pegg) "I am not laughing."
  • (Nick Frost) "Hey, Shaun, look who it is."
  • (Simon Pegg) "Fuck-a-doodle-do."
  • (Nick Frost) "What's up, niggas?"

Simon Pegg as Shaun

  • (Simon Pegg) "All right, what about her, then?"
  • (Nick Frost) "Ooooooh -- cockacidal maniac. Ex-porn star. She's done it all. They say she starred in the world's first interracial hardcore loop --"
  • (Nick Frost) "Café au lait --"
  • (Nick Frost) "-- pour vous."
  • (Simon Pegg) "You're the one that's gone from being a chartered accountant to Charlton Heston."
  • (Dylan Moran) "I'm not a chartered accountant."
  • (Simon Pegg) "Well, you look like one."
  • (Nick Frost) "YEAH."
  • (Dylan Moran) "I'm a lecturer."
  • (Simon Pegg) "You're a twat."
  • (Nick Frost) "YEAH."
  • (Simon Pegg) "You've been to a lock-in."
  • (Kate Ashfield) "Several."
  • (Simon Pegg) "Mum, look, what would you say if I told you that over the years Philip's been quite unkind to me?"
  • (Penelope Wilton) "Well you weren't always the easiest person to live with."
  • (Simon Pegg) "Mum, he chased me around the garden with a bit of wood."
  • (Penelope Wilton) "Well you did call him a you-know-what."
  • (Simon Pegg) "Oh what, did he tell you that?"
  • (Penelope Wilton) "Yes he did."
  • (Simon Pegg) "Motherfucker."
  • (Penelope Wilton) "Shaun."
  • (Simon Pegg) "Sorry mother -- mum."
  • (Simon Pegg) "Did you know that on several occasions -- he touched me?"
  • (Simon Pegg) "That wasn't true. Made it up. Shouldn't have done. Sorry."
  • (Simon Pegg) "This one comes with a basic sort of digital package, uh, you got your Lifestyle Channels there, a bit of "Trisha," um, you got "Entertainment"; don't know what that is. News. All the basic, uh, news channels."
  • (Simon Pegg) "Philip, have you still got the child-locks on?"
  • (Bill Nighy) "Safety first, Shaun."
  • (Simon Pegg) "Oh, he sells a bit of weed every now and again, you know. You've sold puff."
  • (Peter Serafinowicz) "Yeah. Once. At college. To you."
  • (Simon Pegg) "Why is Queen still playing?"
  • (Dylan Moran) "Ah, we have a situation here."
  • (Simon Pegg) "I KNOW."
  • (Simon Pegg) "Would anyone like -- a peanut?"
  • (Simon Pegg) "Got you these."
  • (Kate Ashfield) ""To a wonderful mum"?"
  • (Simon Pegg) "Oooh. Yeah, that's, because -- I thought, it would be, funny, because of what you said last night about me y'know, don't wanna be my mum and that. It's just a little joke, just sort of spur of the moment --"
  • (Kate Ashfield) "They're for your mum, aren't they?"
  • (Simon Pegg) "Yeah."
  • (Kate Ashfield) "Smooth."
  • (Simon Pegg) "I've known him since primary school, you know? I like having him around, he's a laugh."
  • (Peter Serafinowicz) "What, because he can impersonate an orangutan? Fuck-a-doodle-doo."
  • (Simon Pegg) "Oh, leave him alone."
  • (Peter Serafinowicz) "All right, I admit, he can pretty funny on occasion. Like that time we stayed up all night drinking apple Schnappes and playing Tekken 2."
  • (Simon Pegg) "Oh yeah."
  • (Simon Pegg) "When was that?"
  • (Peter Serafinowicz) "That was five years ago. When's he going home?"
  • (Simon Pegg) "Well, I mean, it's not that I don't like David and Di, you know."
  • (Simon Pegg) "Guys, it's not that I don't like you."
  • (Lucy Davis) "It's all right."
  • (Simon Pegg) "And I do want to spend time with you."
  • (Simon Pegg) "It's just Ed doesn't have too many friends --"
  • (Simon Pegg) "He's not my Dad, he's my stepdad."
  • (Simon Pegg) "Don't point that gun at my mum."
  • (Nick Frost) "Don't point that gun at Barbara."
  • (Simon Pegg) "Okay. But dogs CAN look up."
  • (Simon Pegg) "Ed, this is serious."
  • (Simon Pegg) "Who the hell put this on?"
  • (Nick Frost) "It's on random."
  • (Kate Ashfield) "For fuck's sake."
  • (Simon Pegg) "He's not my boyfriend."
  • (Nick Frost) "It might be a bit warm, the cooler's off."
  • (Simon Pegg) "Thanks, babe."
  • (Simon Pegg) "Look, I don't care what the telly says, all right? We have to get out of here. If we don't they'll tear us to pieces, and that is really going to exacerbate things for all of us."
  • (Simon Pegg) "Are you all right?"
  • (Nick Frost) "Come on, let's just go."
  • (Simon Pegg) "Hello?"
  • (Nick Frost) "He's going to be dead either way."
  • (Simon Pegg) "Ed, that's not the point."
  • (Simon Pegg) "Oh, thank God for that."
  • (Simon Pegg) "As Mr. Sloan always says, there is no "I" in team, but there is an "I" in pie. And there's an "I" in meat pie. Anagram of meat is team -- I don't know what he's talking about."
  • (Videogame Voice) "Player two has entered the game."
  • (Simon Pegg) "Ed."
  • (Simon Pegg) "David, kill the Queen."
  • (Dylan Moran) "What?"
  • (Simon Pegg) "The jukebox."
  • (Simon Pegg) "Do you want anything from the shop?"
  • (Nick Frost) "Cornetto."
  • (Simon Pegg) "Now, as well as, er, Mr. Sloane being off today, I'm afraid Ash is, er, feeling a little bit, erm, under the weather. So I will be taking charge as the, erm --"
  • (Rafe Spall) "-- oldest --"
  • (Simon Pegg) "-- senior staff member."
  • (Simon Pegg) "Excuse me?"
  • (Simon Pegg) "Excuse me?"
  • (Simon Pegg) "Hellew?"
  • (Nick Frost) "Oi."
  • (Simon Pegg) "Oh, my God. She's so drunk."
  • (Simon Pegg) "Ohh, for God's sake. He's got an arm off."
  • (Simon Pegg) "Well maybe one should do the other, and then do themselves."
  • (Kate Ashfield) "Oh maybe you should do me, I'll only muck it up if I have to do myself."
  • (Simon Pegg) "You know, I don't think I've got it in me to shoot my flatmate, my mum, and my girlfriend all in the same night."
  • (Kate Ashfield) "What makes you think I'd have taken you back?"
  • (Simon Pegg) "Well -- You don't want to die single do you?"
  • (Nick Frost) "That's it. I would like to be shot."
  • (Simon Pegg) "Besides, I've changed. I haven't had a fag since yesterday, I promise."
  • (Nick Frost) "He hasn't."
  • (Simon Pegg) "I gotta do a wee first."
  • (Simon Pegg) "No, Noel, no matter you might think, okay, I do not find it difficult to keep my work and my social life separate."
  • (Unnamed) "Shaun, it's Liz for you."
  • (Simon Pegg) "All right, I've got a car outside, but it's going to be a bit cramped, so has anyone got transport?"
  • (Lucy Davis) "Yes, yes."
  • (Simon Pegg) "Great, where?"
  • (Lucy Davis) "Oh? No, well I passed my test."
  • (Simon Pegg) "They still out there?"
  • (Nick Frost) "Yeah. What you think we should do?"
  • (Simon Pegg) "Have a sit down?"

Dylan Moran as David

  • (Simon Pegg) "Don't point that gun at my mum."
  • (Nick Frost) "Don't point that gun at Barbara."
  • (Dylan Moran) "I'm not staying here."
  • (Kate Ashfield) "David, don't, that's suicide."
  • (Nick Frost) "I think you should go."
  • (Dylan Moran) "Basically, I'd say your nine lives are up, Shaun"
  • (Simon Pegg) "Get fucked, four eyes. Why don't you go out with her if you love her so much?"
  • (Dylan Moran) "What do you mean by that?"
  • (Dylan Moran) "Well, I don't know what he meant by that."
  • (Dylan Moran) "For a hero, you're quite a hypocrite."
  • (Dylan Moran) "You still haven't met his mum?"
  • (Simon Pegg) "Not yet."
  • (Lucy Davis) "Don't you get on with your mum, Shaun?"
  • (Simon Pegg) "It's not that I don't get on with her --"
  • (Dylan Moran) "Are you ashamed by your mum, Shaun?"
  • (Simon Pegg) "No. I love my mum."
  • (Nick Frost) "I love his mum too."
  • (Simon Pegg) "Ed."
  • (Nick Frost) "She's like butter."
  • (Simon Pegg) "Ed."

Penelope Wilton as Barbara

  • (Penelope Wilton) "My, how you've grown."
  • (Nick Frost) "Yeah, you'd better believe it."
  • (Penelope Wilton) "Some men tried to get into the house."
  • (Simon Pegg) "Well are they still there?"
  • (Penelope Wilton) "I'm not sure, we've shut the curtains."
  • (Simon Pegg) "Did you try the police?"
  • (Penelope Wilton) "Well I thought about it."
  • (Simon Pegg) "Are you OK? Did they hurt you?"
  • (Penelope Wilton) "No I'm fine. I'm fine."
  • (Simon Pegg) "Mum --"
  • (Penelope Wilton) "Well they were a bit -- bitey."
  • (Simon Pegg) "Mum, have you been bitten?"
  • (Penelope Wilton) "No -- But Philip has."
  • (Simon Pegg) "Oh, OK."
  • (Nick Frost) "Has she been bitten?"
  • (Simon Pegg) "No, Philip has."
  • (Nick Frost) "Oh, OK."
  • (Simon Pegg) "Listen, Mum, what sort of state is he in?"
  • (Penelope Wilton) "Oh, he's fine. Bit under the weather."
  • (Simon Pegg) "I see."
  • (Nick Frost) "What's the deal?"
  • (Simon Pegg) "We may have to kill my step-dad."
  • (Penelope Wilton) "It's been a funny sort of day, hasn't it?"
  • (Penelope Wilton) "Hello Pickle. It's me, mum. Dad said he saw you in town today and mentioned that you might be visiting tomorrow, which would be lovely. Will you be bringing Elizabeth with you this time? Only we can't wait to meet her finally and also um -- I was wondering if she wanted anything special for lunch. Cause these days a lot of people don't eat meat."

Lucy Davis as Dianne

  • (Lucy Davis) "I don't think he'd leave us, Davs."
  • (Dylan Moran) "Wouldn't he? Lizzy, how can you put your faith in a man you spectacularly binned for being unreliable? A man whose idea of a romantic nightspot and an impenetrable fortress are the same thing? It's -- This is a pub. We are in a pub. What are we going to do now?"
  • (Nick Frost) "We could get a round in."
  • (Lucy Davis) "Daffs is always taking me to see these listed buildings, and I'm always dragging him to the theatre."

Kate Ashfield as Liz

  • (Kate Ashfield) "You should do me. I'll muck it up if I have to do myself."
  • (Simon Pegg) "I don't think I've got it in me to shoot my flatmate, my mum and my girlfriend all in the same evening."
  • (Kate Ashfield) "You hang out with my friends? Sorry, a failed actress and a twat?"
  • (Simon Pegg) "Well, that's a bit harsh."
  • (Kate Ashfield) "Your words."
  • (Simon Pegg) "I did NOT call Dianne a failed actress."
  • (Kate Ashfield) "You left them in my flat."
  • (Simon Pegg) "Yeah, in the bin."
  • (Kate Ashfield) "I was desperate."
  • (Simon Pegg) "Sneaky monkey --"
  • (Kate Ashfield) "Shaun?"
  • (Simon Pegg) "Yeah?"
  • (Kate Ashfield) "You see what I'm saying?"
  • (Simon Pegg) "Yep, totally."
  • (Kate Ashfield) "I know he's your best friend, but you do live with him."
  • (Simon Pegg) "I know."
  • (Kate Ashfield) "It's not that I don't like Ed."
  • (Kate Ashfield) "Ed, it's not that I don't like you."
  • (Nick Frost) "It's all right."
  • (Kate Ashfield) "It would just be nice if we could --"
  • (Nick Frost) "Fuck."
  • (Kate Ashfield) "-- spend a bit more time together --"
  • (Nick Frost) "Bollocks."
  • (Kate Ashfield) "-- just the two of us."
  • (Nick Frost) "Cock it."
  • (Kate Ashfield) "It's just with Ed here, it's no wonder I always bring my flat-mates out and then that only exacerbates things."
  • (Simon Pegg) "What do you mean?"
  • (Kate Ashfield) "Well you guys hardly get on, do you?"
  • (Simon Pegg) "No, what does "exacerbate" mean?"
  • (Kate Ashfield) "It means um, to make things worse."
  • (Simon Pegg) "Right. Well I mean, it's not that I don't like David and Di."
  • (Simon Pegg) "Guys, it's not that I don't like you."
  • (Lucy Davis) "It's all right."
  • (Simon Pegg) "And it's not that I don't want to spend time with you cause I do. It's just -- Ed doesn't have too many friends."
  • (Nick Frost) "Can I get -- any of you cunts -- a drink?"
  • (Kate Ashfield) "Well -- is it clear?"
  • (Simon Pegg) "No."
  • (Kate Ashfield) "How many?"
  • (Simon Pegg) "Lots."

Bill Nighy as Philip

  • (Bill Nighy) "You are not driving that car --"
  • (Simon Pegg) "PHILIP. Give me the car keys --"
  • (Bill Nighy) "You got red on you."
  • (Bill Nighy) "You didn't call the doctor, did you?"
  • (Penelope Wilton) "Well, I thought we ought to be on the safe side."
  • (Bill Nighy) "I'm quite all right, Barbara, I ran it under a cold tap."
  • (Penelope Wilton) "I really think --"
  • (Bill Nighy) "We had our jabs when we went to the Isle of Wight."
  • (Penelope Wilton) "But Philip --"
  • (Bill Nighy) "It's a lot of overblown nonsense, a lot of drug nuts running wild."
  • (Bill Nighy) "You do realise this is a 20 mph zone?"
  • (Nick Frost) "Oh yeah."

Peter Serafinowicz as Pete

  • (Peter Serafinowicz) "Now, I'm not saying it was you."
  • (Simon Pegg) "I know, man --"
  • (Peter Serafinowicz) "I'm saying it was Ed."
  • (Simon Pegg) "Right."
  • (Peter Serafinowicz) "It's four in the fucking morning."
  • (Simon Pegg) "It's Saturday."
  • (Peter Serafinowicz) "No, it's not. It's fucking Sunday. And I've got to go to fucking work in four fucking hours 'cos every other fucker in my fucking department is fucking ill. Now can you see why I'm SO FUCKING ANGRY?"
  • (Nick Frost) "Fuck, yeah."

Martin Freeman as Declan

  • (Martin Freeman) "Hi."
  • (Reece Shearsmith) "Hello."
  • (Tamsin Greig) "Hi."
  • (Yvonne's Mum) "Hello."
  • (Matt Lucas) "Hello."

Jessica Hynes as Yvonne

  • (Jessica Hynes) "Oh, my God. Shaun."
  • (Jessica Hynes) "Shaun. How are you doing?"
  • (Simon Pegg) "Surviving."

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