Pilot (The Big Bang Theory) Quotes

Pilot (The Big Bang Theory) is a TV show that first aired in 1970 . Pilot stopped airing in 1970.

Pilot (The Big Bang Theory) Quotes

• (Penny) "I'm a vegetarian. Except for fish. And the occasional steak, I love steak."

• (Leonard) "At least I didn't have to invent 26 dimensions just to make the math come out."
• (Sheldon) "I didn't invent them. They're there."
• (Leonard) "In what universe?"
• (Sheldon) "In all of them, that is the point."

• (Sheldon) "Leonard has a lady over."
• (Wolowitz) "Yeah, right, your grandmother's back in town?"

• (Wolowitz) "Bonne Douche."
• (Penny) "I'm sorry?"
• (Wolowitz) "It's French for "Good shower". It's a sentiment I can express in six languages."
• (Leonard) "Save it for your blog, Howard."

• (Sheldon) "I really think we should examine the chain of causality here."
• (Leonard) "Must we?"
• (Sheldon) "Event A: A beautiful woman stands naked in our shower. Event B: We drive halfway across town to retrieve a television set from the aforementioned woman's ex-boyfriend. Query: On what plane of existence is there even a semi-rational link between these events?"
• (Leonard) "She asked me to do her a favor, Sheldon."
• (Sheldon) "Ah, yes. Well, that may be the proximal cause of our journey, but we both know it only exists in contradistinction to the higher-level distal cause."
• (Leonard) "Which is?"
• (Sheldon) "You think with your penis."

• (Leonard) "We brought home Indian food, and I know that moving can be stressful and I find that when I'm undergoing stress, good food and company can have a comforting effect. Also curry is a natural laxative, and I don't have to tell you that a clean colon is one less thing to worry about."
• (Sheldon) "Leonard, I'm no expert here but I believe in the context of a luncheon invitation, you might want to skip the reference to bowel movements."

• (Sheldon) "I don't know your odds in the world as a whole, but as far as the population of this car goes, you're a veritable mac daddy."

• (Sheldon) "But then some poor woman is going to pin her hopes on my sperm, what if she winds up with a toddler that doesn't know if he should use an integral or a differential to solve for the area under a curve?"
• (Leonard) "I'm sure she'll still love him."
• (Sheldon) "I wouldn't."

• (Sheldon) "If by "Holy Smokes", you mean a derivative restatement of the kind of stuff you could find scribbled on the wall of any men's room at MIT, sure."

• (Penny) "Four years I lived with him. Four years, I mean that's like as long as high school."
• (Sheldon) "It took you FOUR YEARS to get through high school?"

• (Wolowitz) "Enchanté, mademoiselle. Howard Wolowitz, Caltech department of applied physics, you may be familiar with some of my work, it's currently orbiting Jupiter's largest moon taking high resolution digital photographs?"
• (Penny) "Penny -- I work at the Cheesecake Factory."

• (Leonard) "Come on. We have a combined IQ of 360 we should be able to figure out how to get into a stupid building."
• (Sheldon) "What do you think their combined IQ is?"

• (Leonard) "Should we have invited her for lunch?"
• (Sheldon) "No, we're gonna start season two of Battlestar Galactica."
• (Leonard) "We already watched the season two DVDs."
• (Sheldon) "Not with commentary."

• (Penny) "So, what do you guys do for fun around here?"
• (Sheldon) "Well, today we tried masturbating for money."

• (Sheldon) "Uhm, Penny, that's where I sit."
• (Penny) "So sit next to me."
• (Sheldon) "No, I sit there."
• (Penny) "What's the difference?"
• (Sheldon) "What's the difference?"
• (Leonard) "Here we go."
• (Sheldon) "In the winter, that seat is close enough to the radiator to remain warm, and yet not so close as to cause perspiration. In the summer, it's directly in the path of a cross-breeze created by opening windows there and there. It faces the television at an angle that is neither direct, thus discouraging conversation, nor so far wide as to create a parallax distortion. I could go on."

• (Leonard) "We need to widen our circle."
• (Sheldon) "I have a very wide circle. I have 212 friends on MySpace."
• (Leonard) "Yes, and you've never met one of them."
• (Sheldon) "That's the beauty of it."

• (Penny) "I'm sorry, do you speak English?"
• (Wolowitz) "Oh, he speaks English, he just can't speak to women."
• (Penny) "Really? Why?"
• (Wolowitz) "He's kind of a nerd. Juice box?"

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