No Census, No Feeling Quotes

No Census, No Feeling is a television show that debuted in 1970 . No Census, No Feeling ended in 1970.

It features Del Lord as producer, and Lucien Ballard as head of cinematography.

No Census, No Feeling is recorded in English and originally aired in United States. Each episode of No Census, No Feeling is duration No Census, No Feeling is distributed by Columbia Pictures.

No Census, No Feeling Quotes

• (Unnamed) "Pardon me sir, but I'm taking census, where were you born?"
• (Unnamed) "Lake Winnipesaukee."
• (Unnamed) "Lake Winnip-how many in the family?"
• (Unnamed) "I was one of a litter of three."
• (Unnamed) "Now don't tell me you're the one they kept."
• (Unnamed) "Nah, I was the one they threw away."

• (Unnamed) "Pardon me sir, but I'm taking census, where were you born?"
• (Unnamed) "Lake Winnipesaukee."
• (Unnamed) "Lake Winnip-how many in the family?"
• (Unnamed) "I was one of a litter of three."
• (Unnamed) "Now don't tell me you're the one they kept."
• (Unnamed) "Nah, I was the one they threw away."

• (Unnamed) "Does your drink taste all right?"
• (Unnamed) "A little heavy on the Angora Bitters. In fact, I think the goat walked right through it, I'm sure."

• (Unnamed) "Boy, look at that. There must be a hundred thousand people in there. We'll make a fortune."
• (Unnamed) "Woo-woo."
• (Unnamed) "How much is four cents times a hundred thousand?"
• (Unnamed) "Nyahhh --"
• (Unnamed) "A dollar and a half."
• (Unnamed) "A dollar and a half?"
• (Unnamed) "That's without the tax."

• (Unnamed) "Good morning, sir, I'm the census taker. Are you married or happy?"
• (Henry's wife) "Hen-ry."
• (Unnamed) "Married."

• (Unnamed) "Roses are red, and how do you do? Drink four of these and woo, woo, woo, woo."

• (Unnamed) "Where were you born?"
• (Unnamed) "Lake Winnipesaukee."
• (Unnamed) "How do you spell that?"
• (Unnamed) "W-O -- woof. Make it Lake Erie I got an Uncle there."
• (Unnamed) "What was your family decomposed of?"
• (Unnamed) "Well, I'll tell ya. There was a litter of three, and I was the one they kept. N'yuk n'yuk n'yuk."

• (Unnamed) "Now, calm yourself. We're census takers, madam. How old are you?"
• (Unnamed) "What address is this?"
• (Unnamed) "One hundred and two."
• (Unnamed) "You don't look a day over eighty."
• (Unnamed) "Young man, I'm twenty-nine."
• (Unnamed) "Oh, yeah?"
• (Unnamed) "Well, how do I look?"
• (Unnamed) "Oh, you look like a million."
• (Unnamed) "Ah, she can't be that old. (Larry and Moe open her mouth and check her teeth.) Forty-three."
• (Unnamed) "Fifty."
• (Unnamed) "Forty-three."
• (Unnamed) "Fifty."
• (Unnamed) "Forty-three."
• (Unnamed) "Fifty, fifty, fifty, fifty, fifty, fifty, (mouth begins to move much faster) fifty, fifty, fifty, fifty, fifty, fifty, fifty, fifty, fifty --"
• (Unnamed) "Sooold American."

• (Unnamed) "Pardon us, madame, we're census takers. What's your name?"
• (Unnamed) "And your address?"
• (Unnamed) "What's more important, what's your phone number? Nyuk, nyuk --"

• (Unnamed) "Where is everybody?"
• (Unnamed) "Maybe it's The Fourth of July."
• (Unnamed) "The Fourth of July in October?"
• (Unnamed) "You never can tell -- look what they did to Thanksgiving."

• (Unnamed) "Are you married or happy?"

• (Unnamed) "Boy, you got brains like Napoleon."
• (Unnamed) "Napoleon's dead."
• (Unnamed) "I know it."

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