Ninotchka Quotes

Ninotchka is a television program that debuted in 1970 . Ninotchka completed its run in 1970.

It features Ernst Lubitsch as producer, Werner R. Heymann in charge of musical score, and William Daniels (cinematographer) as head of cinematography.

Ninotchka is recorded in English and originally aired in United States. Each episode of Ninotchka is 110 minutes long. Ninotchka is distributed by Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer.

The cast includes: Greta Garbo as Ninotchka, Melvyn Douglas as Leon, Felix Bressart as Buljanoff, Bela Lugosi as Comissar Razinin, Sig Ruman as Iranoff, Tamara Shayne as Anna, Ina Claire as Swana, Edwin Maxwell as Mercier, Richard Carle as Gaston, and Ina Claire as Grand Duchess Swana.

Ninotchka Quotes

Sig Ruman as Iranoff

• (Sig Ruman) "Can you imagine what the beds would be in a hotel like that?"
• (Comrade Kopalski) "They tell me when you ring once, the valet comes in; when you ring twice you get a waiter; and do you know what happens when you ring three times? A maid comes in; a French maid."
• (Sig Ruman) "Comrades, if we ring nine times; let's go in."

• (Sig Ruman) "We can say whatever we want. We can shout. We can complain. Look: THE SERVICE IN THIS HOTEL IS TERRIBLE. See? Nobody comes, nobody pays any attention. That's freedom."
• (Felix Bressart) "That's bad management."

• (Sig Ruman) "I suppose you expect us just to hand over the jewels, huh?"
• (Melvyn Douglas) "Oh, no. No, I'm not a highwayman, just a nuisance."

• (Sig Ruman) "He is cutting our throat."
• (Felix Bressart) "What can we do? We have to accept."
• (Comrade Kopalski) "Comrades, comrades. Don't let's give in so quickly. After all, we have to uphold the prestige of Russia."
• (Felix Bressart) "All right, let's uphold it for another ten minutes."

• (Sig Ruman) "Why are you so good to us?"

• (Sig Ruman) "Do you want to be alone, comrade?"
• (Greta Garbo) "No."

• (Sig Ruman) "That must be the one."
• (Felix Bressart) "Yes. He looks like a Comrade."
• (Man at Railroad Station) "Heil Hitler."
• (German Woman at Railroad Station) "Heil Hitler."
• (Sig Ruman) "No, that's not him."
• (Felix Bressart) "Positively not."

Greta Garbo as Ninotchka

• (Greta Garbo) "I am so happy. Oh, I'm so happy. No one can be so happy without being punished. I will be punished and I should be punished."

• (Greta Garbo) "So, it's your house?"
• (Melvyn Douglas) "Well, let's say I live in it. It's such a pleasant little place. It has all the comforts. Easy to reach; near the subway, bus and streetcar --"
• (Greta Garbo) "Does it mean you want me to go there?"
• (Melvyn Douglas) "Oh, now, please, please, don't misunderstand me."
• (Greta Garbo) "Then, you don't want me to go there?"
• (Melvyn Douglas) "No, no, no, no. No, no. I didn't say that either. Naturally, nothing would please me more."
• (Greta Garbo) "Then, why don't we go? You might be an interesting subject of study."
• (Melvyn Douglas) "I'll do my best."

• (Greta Garbo) "What's that?"
• (Comrade Kopalski) "It's a hat, Comrade. A woman's hat."
• (Greta Garbo) "How can such a civilization survive which permits their women to put things like that on their heads. It won't be long now, Comrades."

• (Greta Garbo) "Oh, yes. I know what that is. There's one around here somewhere. It has a little knob that you turn."
• (Melvyn Douglas) "A little knob, that's right."
• (Greta Garbo) "Yeah, maybe it's in here."
• (Melvyn Douglas) "It has a little knob."
• (Greta Garbo) "It has a knob, now. Maybe it's in here?"
• (Melvyn Douglas) "It has a little knob."
• (Greta Garbo) "Let's see. There it is. There's the knob."
• (Melvyn Douglas) "There's the knob."

• (Pere Mathieu, Cafe Owner) "Now, what shall it be?"
• (Greta Garbo) "Raw beets and carrots."
• (Pere Mathieu, Cafe Owner) "Madame, this is a restaurant, not a meadow."

• (Greta Garbo) "When I kissed you, I betrayed a Russian ideal. I should be stood up against the wall."
• (Melvyn Douglas) "Would that make you feel better?"
• (Greta Garbo) "Much better."
• (Greta Garbo) "I have paid the penalty."

• (Greta Garbo) "It's funny to look back. I was brought up on goat's milk, had a ration of vodka in the army, and, now, champagne."
• (Melvyn Douglas) "From goats to grapes. That's drinking in the right direction."

• (Greta Garbo) "I have heard of the arrogant male in capitalistic society. It is having a superior earning power that makes you that way."
• (Melvyn Douglas) "A Russian. I love Russians. Comrade, I've been fascinated by your five-year plan for the last fifteen years."
• (Greta Garbo) "Your type will soon be extinct."

• (Greta Garbo) "Would you like to see my wound?"
• (Melvyn Douglas) "I'd love to."

• (Greta Garbo) "What are you after?"
• (Melvyn Douglas) "Must one always be after something?"
• (Greta Garbo) "Your tactics are useless."

• (Greta Garbo) "We don't have men like you in my country."
• (Melvyn Douglas) "Thank you."
• (Greta Garbo) "That is why I believe in the future of my country."

• (Greta Garbo) "If you wish to approach me --"
• (Melvyn Douglas) "You know I want to."
• (Greta Garbo) "Then, do it through my lawyer."

• (Greta Garbo) "Must you flirt?"
• (Melvyn Douglas) "Well, I don't have to, but I find it natural."
• (Greta Garbo) "Suppress it."

• (Greta Garbo) "I want to tell you something which I thought I would never say, which I thought nobody should ever say because I thought it didn't exist. And Leon, I can't say it."

• (Greta Garbo) "What have you done for mankind?"
• (Melvyn Douglas) "Not so much for mankind -- for womankind, my record isn't quite so bleak."

• (Greta Garbo) "I am a traitor. When I kissed you, I betrayed a Russian ideal. I should be stood up against the wall."
• (Melvyn Douglas) "Would that make you any happier?"
• (Greta Garbo) "Much happier."
• (Melvyn Douglas) "All right."
• (Greta Garbo) "I have paid the penalty. Now, let's have some music."

• (Greta Garbo) "I must have a complete report of your negotiations and a detailed expense account."
• (Felix Bressart) "No, non, Ninotchka. Don't ask for it. There's an old Turkish proverb that says: If something smells bad, why put your nose in it?"
• (Greta Garbo) "And there is an old Russian saying: The cat with cream on his whiskers had better find good excuses."

• (Greta Garbo) "I should hate to see our country endangered by my underwear."

• (Greta Garbo) "It's never too late to change. I used to belong to the petty bourgeoisie, myself."
• (Melvyn Douglas) "No."
• (Greta Garbo) "My father and mother wanted me to stay and work on the farm. But, I preferred the bayonet."

• (Greta Garbo) "Problems were never solved by bowing from a balcony."

• (Greta Garbo) "Now, don't misunderstand me. I do not hold your frivolity against you. As basic material, you may not be bad; but you are the unfortunate product of a doomed culture. I feel very sorry for you."

• (Greta Garbo) "What do we do now?"
• (Melvyn Douglas) "Shall we have some music?"
• (Greta Garbo) "Is that customary?"
• (Melvyn Douglas) "It helps. It has ever since King David wooed Bathsheba with his harp. Not being so fortunate as to having my harp at hand, I'll turn on the radio."

• (Greta Garbo) "How much does this cost?"
• (Sig Ruman) "2,000 Francs."
• (Greta Garbo) "A week?"
• (Sig Ruman) "A day."
• (Greta Garbo) "Do you know how much a cow cost, Comrade Iranoff?"
• (Sig Ruman) "A cow?"
• (Greta Garbo) "2,000 Francs. If I stay here a week, It will cost the Russian people seven cows. Who am I to cost the Russian people seven cows?"

Felix Bressart as Buljanoff

(We don't have any quotes for this character)

Melvyn Douglas as Leon

• (Melvyn Douglas) "Oh, Ninotchka, don't take things so seriously. Nothings worth it, really."

• (Melvyn Douglas) "Now, what should we get? The news?"
• (Greta Garbo) "No, news. We don't want to know what's happening in the world. We want to be left alone. Don't we?"

• (Melvyn Douglas) "Your finger, please."
• (Greta Garbo) "Why do you need my finger?"
• (Melvyn Douglas) "It's bad manners to point with your own."

• (Melvyn Douglas) "Pardon me, are you an explorer?"
• (Greta Garbo) "No. I'm looking for the Eiffel Tower."
• (Melvyn Douglas) "Good heavens, is that thing lost again? Oh, are you interested in a view?"
• (Greta Garbo) "I'm interested in the Eiffel Tower from a technical standpoint."
• (Melvyn Douglas) "Technical? No, no, I'm afraid I couldn't be of much help from that angle. You see, a Parisian only goes to the tower in moments of despair to jump off."
• (Greta Garbo) "How long does it take a man to land?"
• (Melvyn Douglas) "Now isn't that too bad? The last time I jumped, I forgot to time it."

• (Melvyn Douglas) "Love isn't so simple."

• (Melvyn Douglas) "I want to see a friend of mine; a very dear friend. Its a personal matter that has no relation to social philosophies or politics. It's a girl."
• (Russian Visa Official) "So, it is love which drags you to Moscow.?"
• (Melvyn Douglas) "Yes."
• (Russian Visa Official) "No visa."

• (Melvyn Douglas) "I warn you gentlemen, if this case comes to trial, it'll be before a French court. And when the Grand Duchess takes the stand --"
• (Sig Ruman) "All right, go ahead. Get her on the witness stand. What can she say?"
• (Melvyn Douglas) "Well, how will she look? The fashions this Spring are very becoming to her. Oh, Gentlemen, the judge will be French. The jury will be French. Everybody in the courtroom will be French. Have you ever seen a French court, when a beautiful woman sits in the witness stand and then raises her skirt a little? You sit down and pull up your pants and where would it get you?"

• (Melvyn Douglas) "It's midnight. Look at the clock, one hand has met the other hand, they kiss. Isn't that wonderful?"

• (Melvyn Douglas) "But, darling, we won't have to worry about our future if you're willing to rattle off your past."

• (Melvyn Douglas) "Ninotchka, why do doves bill and coo? Why do snails, the coldest of all creatures, circle interminably around each other? Why do moths fly hundreds of miles to find their mates? Why do flowers slowly open their petals? Oh, Ninotchka, Ninotchka, surely you feel some slight symptom of the divine passion? A general warmth in the palms of your hands. A strange heaviness in your limbs. A burning of the lips that isn't thirst, but, something a thousand times more tantalizing, more exulting than thirst."
• (Greta Garbo) "You're very talkative."
• (Melvyn Douglas) "Was that talkative?"
• (Greta Garbo) "No, that was restful. Again."
• (Greta Garbo) "Thank you."

• (Melvyn Douglas) "Ninotchka, tell me, you're so expert on things, can it be that I'm falling in love with you?"
• (Greta Garbo) "Why must you bring in wrong values? Love is a romantic designation for a most ordinary biological or, shall we say, chemical process. A lot of nonsense is talked and written about it."
• (Melvyn Douglas) "Oh, I see. What do you use instead?"
• (Greta Garbo) "I acknowledge the existence of a natural impulse; common to all."
• (Melvyn Douglas) "What can I possibly do to encourage such an impulse in you?"
• (Greta Garbo) "You don't have to do a thing. Chemically, we're already quite sympathetic."

• (Melvyn Douglas) "A man comes into a restaurant. He sits down at the table. He says, "Waiter, bring me a cup of coffee without cream." Five minutes later the waiter comes back and says, "I'm sorry sir, we have no cream, can it be without milk?""

• (Melvyn Douglas) "Did I hear something about jewels?"

• (Melvyn Douglas) "Good evening, Gaston."
• (Richard Carle) "Good evening, Monsieur."
• (Greta Garbo) "Is this what you call the butler?"
• (Melvyn Douglas) "Yes."
• (Greta Garbo) "Good evening, Comrade."
• (Greta Garbo) "This man is very old. You shouldn't make him work."
• (Melvyn Douglas) "He takes good care of them."
• (Greta Garbo) "He looks sad. Do you whip him?"
• (Melvyn Douglas) "No. But, the mere thought makes my mouth water."
• (Greta Garbo) "A day will come when you'll be free. Go to bed, little father. We want to be alone."

• (Melvyn Douglas) "I'll picket your whole country. I'll boycott you. That's what I'll do. No more vodka. No more caviar. No more Tchaikovsky. No more borscht."

• (Melvyn Douglas) "You like Scotch stories?"
• (Greta Garbo) "Never heard one."
• (Melvyn Douglas) "Well, two Scotchmen met on the street; and I don't know the name of the street, it doesn't matter anyway; one's name was McGillicuddy. The other one's name was McIntosh. McGillicuddy said to McIntosh, "Hello, Mr McGillicuddy." McGillicuddy, McIntosh said to McGillicuddy, "Hello, Mr. McIn; Mr. McGillicuddy." Then, McGillicuddy says to McIntosh, "How's Mrs. McIntosh?" And McIntosh says to McGillicuddy, "How's Mrs. McGillicuddy?""
• (Greta Garbo) "I wish they'd never met."

• (Melvyn Douglas) "A radio's a little box that you buy on the installment plan, and before you tune it in, they tell you there's a new model out."

• (Melvyn Douglas) "What kind of a girl are you, anyway?"
• (Greta Garbo) "Just what you see. A tiny cog in the great wheel of evolution."
• (Melvyn Douglas) "You're the most adorable cog I've ever seen."

• (Melvyn Douglas) "Where shall we begin?"
• (Greta Garbo) "I will start with you."
• (Melvyn Douglas) "Excellent. Now, let's see, I'm 35 years old, just over six feet tall, and weigh 182 pounds, stripped."

• (Melvyn Douglas) "Ninotchka, it's midnight. One half of Paris is making love to the other half."
• (Greta Garbo) "You merely feel you must put yourself in a romantic mood to add to your exhilaration."
• (Melvyn Douglas) "I can't possibly think of any better reason."

Tamara Shayne as Anna

• (Tamara Shayne) "You know how it is today. All you have to do is wear a pair of silk stockings and they suspect you of counter-revolution."

Ina Claire as Grand Duchess Swana

• (Ina Claire) "Oh, I'm so bored with this face. I wish I had someone else's face. Who's face would you have if you had your choice? Oh, well, I guess one gets the face one deserves."

• (Ina Claire) "Oh, it's pretty hopeless. There may be a chance, that's all. The French Government has recognized Soviet Russia and he doubts that they will risk a war for my poor sake. He might be able to make up some kind of a case. But, it will cost money. Money. Money. That's all they're interested in; those lawyers."

• (Ina Claire) "The morning after always looks grim if you happen to be wearing last night's dress."

Edwin Maxwell as Mercier

• (Edwin Maxwell) "Come, gentlemen, let's put our cards on the table. Right now, there's a Russian commission in New York trying to sell 15 Rembrandts. There's another in London, mortgaging the oil fields in Baku. You need money and you need it quickly. Now, I think my offer is a very fair one. It doesn't even take advantage of your situation."

• (Edwin Maxwell) "Frankly gentlemen, we're expected to take a loss."
• (Sig Ruman) "Capitalistic methods --"
• (Felix Bressart) "They accumulate millions while taking loss after loss."

Richard Carle as Gaston

• (Richard Carle) "I view with alarm the influence over you of this Bolshevik lady."

Bela Lugosi as Comissar Razinin

• (Bela Lugosi) "This anonymous report was sent to me. They're dragging the good name of our country through every cafe and nightclub. Here: How can the Bolshevik cause gain respect among the Muslims if your three representatives Bujlianoff, Iranoff and Kopalski get so drunk that they throw a carpet out of their hotel window and complain to the management that it didn't fly?"

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