Night at the Museum Quotes

Night at the Museum is a television program that was first aired in 1970 . Night at the Museum stopped airing in 1970.

It features Shawn Levy, Chris Columbus, and Michael Barnathan as producer, Alan Silvestri in charge of musical score, and Guillermo Navarro as head of cinematography.

Night at the Museum is recorded in English and originally aired in United Kingdom. Each episode of Night at the Museum is 104 minutes long. Night at the Museum is distributed by 20th Century Fox.

The cast includes: Ben Stiller as Larry, Owen Wilson as Jedediah, Steve Coogan as Octavius, Mickey Rooney as Gus, Carla Gugino as Rebecca, Owen Wilson as Jedadiah, Ricky Gervais as Mr. McPhee, Dick Van Dyke as Cecil, Paul Rudd as Don, Bill Cobbs as Reginald, Anne Meara as Debbie, and Kim Raver as Erica Daley.

Night at the Museum Quotes

Mickey Rooney as Gus

• (Mickey Rooney) "Sleep tight, hotshot."

• (Mickey Rooney) "Sweet dreams, cupcake."

• (Mickey Rooney) "Do you want the job or not, snack shack?"

• (Mickey Rooney) "Keep a lid on it, butterscotch."

• (Mickey Rooney) "Instructions; you start with 1 -- 2 -- 3 --"
• (Ben Stiller) "4?"
• (Mickey Rooney) "Are you crackin' wise? I oughta punch you in the nose, Hopscotch."

• (Mickey Rooney) "Do you want to dance, hot dog?"

• (Mickey Rooney) "Listen up, Lunch Box."

Dick Van Dyke as Cecil

• (Dick Van Dyke) "Moving on."

• (Dick Van Dyke) "Gotta keep it moving, Larry. I'm pretty spry for an old man."

• (Dick Van Dyke) "These are money carriers. Larry. They were trained not to stop for anything but a secret word."
• (Ben Stiller) "Really? You mean a word like --"
• (Ben Stiller) "Dakota."

• (Dick Van Dyke) "Don't let anything in or out."

Ben Stiller as Larry

• (Ben Stiller) "This is not worth $11.50 an hour."

• (Easter Island Head) "Hey. Dum-dum."
• (Ben Stiller) "Yes?"
• (Easter Island Head) "You give me gum-gum."
• (Ben Stiller) "I give you gum-gum?"
• (Easter Island Head) "You new Dum-dum. You give me gum-gum."
• (Ben Stiller) "Gee, okay, you know what? I have no gum-gum. Sorry. And my name isn't Dum-dum. My name's Larry."
• (Easter Island Head) "No, your name Dum-dum."
• (Easter Island Head) "Oh, you in trouble, Dum-dum. You better run-run. From Attila the Hun-hun."
• (Easter Island Head) "See you later, Dum-dum."

• (Ben Stiller) "End of the line, cool breeze. End of the line."

• (Ben Stiller) "Was she deaf? She seems a bit unresponsive."
• (Carla Gugino) "That's because she's a statue --"

• (Ben Stiller) "A little birdie told me somebody likes -- magic."
• (Attila the Hun) "Magic?"

• (Sacajawea) "He went east, but he lost control and crashed."
• (Ben Stiller) "You're amazing. How can you tell that?"

• (Ben Stiller) "Hey guys. Quest for fire, over."

• (Ben Stiller) "All right. Let's do this, people. And -- animals. And -- weird faceless puppet creatures."

• (Ben Stiller) "Debbie; can I call you Debbie? 'Cause, um, I felt a connection when I entered this office, and I don't know if you did too."
• (Anne Meara) "I didn't feel a connection."

• (Ben Stiller) "He was our fourth president, right?"
• (Carla Gugino) "Twenty-sixth."

• (Ben Stiller) "I'm trusting you guys, alright? And if you don't do what I say, you'll end up like your little buddies in the Mayan world over there, locked up. Take a look. Do they look happy?"
• (Owen Wilson) "No. They look sad."

• (Ben Stiller) "Listen, Octavus, you gotta stop that."
• (Steve Coogan) "It's "Octavius", Mary."

• (Ben Stiller) "Fetch?"

• (Ben Stiller) "Oh, hey, Dexter. I'm just locking up. Do you want in?"
• (Ben Stiller) "I don't think so. Looks like Uncle Larry pulled a fast one on little Dexy."
• (Ben Stiller) "Those are baby keys for a little baby. So have fun playing with your little baby keys, little baby monkey. Maybe tomorrow, I'll bring you a little baby "diapie" so you can go poo-poo in it. Then, I'll change it for you. Then I'll tickle you 'cause you're a cute little baby. Will you cry all night about how Uncle Larry fooled you? Told you there was a storm comin'."

• (Ben Stiller) "I'm not a giant, guys, alright? You guys are really little."
• (Steve Coogan) "We may be small but our hearts are large -- metaphorically speaking."

Bill Cobbs as Reginald

(We don't have any quotes for this character)

Carla Gugino as Rebecca

• (Carla Gugino) "You rock. I am a big fan."

• (Carla Gugino) "And up ahead is one of my favorite creatures in the whole museum: the capuchin monkey, a highly intelligent primate, known for its loving and generous nature."
• (Ben Stiller) "Huh."
• (Carla Gugino) "Excuse me?"

• (Carla Gugino) "So. What can I tell you about the museum?"
• (Ben Stiller) "Ok, Attila the Hun: What is that guy's problem?"

Ricky Gervais as Mr. McPhee

• (Ricky Gervais) "Let's all laugh at me, the comedy night guard. No is the answer. Sarcasm back at you, with your humor box. I wasn't laughing. I was pretending to laugh, if that's what you want, some sort of battle of humor. Do you?"
• (Ben Stiller) "No, I don't want to get into a battle of humor."
• (Ricky Gervais) "No, you don't, because it would be a bloodbath. Nothing funny about Little Big Horn."

• (Ricky Gervais) "Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice --"

• (Ricky Gervais) "Control your young."

Owen Wilson as Jedediah

• (Owen Wilson) "Wait, no. I ain't working with Toga Boy."
• (Steve Coogan) "Romans work alone."
• (Steve Coogan) "Ow."
• (Owen Wilson) "That didn't hurt, don't be a baby."
• (Steve Coogan) "Yes it did."
• (Owen Wilson) "No it didn't. Come on."
• (Owen Wilson) "Ow. That was much harder."

• (Owen Wilson) "Just living the Dream, Baby."

• (Owen Wilson) "I told you, I don't like to be manhandled."
• (Ben Stiller) "No, I will manhandle you, Jedediah. Now listen, guys, what is your problem, huh? Why can't you just get along?"
• (Owen Wilson) "Look, we're men. We fight, okay? That's what we do."
• (Steve Coogan) "It's kinda how we pass the time."

• (Owen Wilson) "Fire up the iron horse, boys."
• (Ben Stiller) "Hey, blondie."
• (Owen Wilson) "Name's Jedadiah."
• (Ben Stiller) "Alright, Jedadiah, stop the train, please."
• (Owen Wilson) "Big no can do, crackerjack."
• (Ben Stiller) "What's going on here, huh?"
• (Owen Wilson) "Somebody's got to pay."
• (Ben Stiller) "Pay for what?"
• (Owen Wilson) "I don't know, just pay. Now stop whining and just take it like a man."
• (Ben Stiller) "Seriously, stop the train."
• (Owen Wilson) "Alright, stop the train."
• (Ben Stiller) "Thank you."
• (Owen Wilson) "Now full speed ahead and ram 'im. Split his head like a watermelon."
• (Ben Stiller) "Ooh. Ow --"
• (Owen Wilson) "Oh, for crying out loud."

• (Owen Wilson) "I'm gonna shoot you in your dang eye. In your dadgum eye."
• (Ben Stiller) "Yeah. Keep shootin'. Nothing's gonna happen."
• (Owen Wilson) "Now you know my shame. Jedediah's impotent rage. His guns don't fire. Take me away."

• (Owen Wilson) "It's Manifest Destiny."

• (Owen Wilson) "Whoa, Octavius, hold on. This ain't your fight. This here giant's on our land."

• (Owen Wilson) "Let's ride."

• (Owen Wilson) "No problemo, Gigantor."
• (Ben Stiller) "Um, my name's Larry, first of all okay, Jed? See, I call you Jed, I don't call you tiny, right?"
• (Owen Wilson) "What's that supposed to mean?"
• (Ben Stiller) "Hey teeny, how does that sound?"
• (Owen Wilson) "I -- I don't like it. It hurts my feelings."
• (Ben Stiller) "Okay, well Gigantor makes me feel like some sort of freak."
• (Steve Coogan) "I don't. I just call you Larry."
• (Ben Stiller) "Don't be a kiss-ass."

Steve Coogan as Octavius

• (Steve Coogan) "We expand or die."

Paul Rudd as Don

• (Paul Rudd) "It sure is chilly. Chilly-chilly-willy -- the penguin."

Kim Raver as Erica Daley

• (Kim Raver) "Hey, how's it going with that virtual reality driving range you wanted to open?"
• (Ben Stiller) "Getting there. Still waiting for the technology to catch up with the idea. I mean it's not easy, there are a lot of moving parts."

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