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Men in Black 3 Quotes

Men in Black 3 is a TV program that appeared on TV in 1970 . Men in Black 3 ended its run in 1970.

It features Walter F. Parkes; Laurie MacDonald as producer, Danny Elfman in charge of musical score, and Bill Pope as head of cinematography.

Men in Black 3 is recorded in English and originally aired in United States. Each episode of Men in Black 3 is 106 minutes long. Men in Black 3 is distributed by Sony Pictures Releasing.

The cast includes: Will Smith as Agent J, Tommy Lee Jones and Josh Brolin as Agent K, Michael Stuhlbarg as Griffin, Emma Thompson and Alice Eve as Agent O, Keone Young as Mr. Wu, Bill Hader as Andy Warhol, Michael Chernus as Jeffrey Price, and Lanny Flaherty as Obadiah Price.

Men in Black 3 Quotes

Tommy Lee Jones and Josh Brolin as Agent K

  • (Tommy Lee Jones and Josh Brolin) "There are things out there you don't need to know about."
  • (Will Smith) "That's not the lie you told me when you recruited me."
  • (Tommy Lee Jones and Josh Brolin) "I promised the secrets of the universe, nothing more."
  • (Will Smith) "Well, what other secrets are there?"
  • (Tommy Lee Jones and Josh Brolin) "Don't ask questions you don't want to know the answer to."
  • (Boris The Animal) "Hello, K."
  • (Tommy Lee Jones and Josh Brolin) "Boris the Animal."
  • (Boris The Animal) "It's just Boris."
  • (Tommy Lee Jones and Josh Brolin) "You haven't changed very much. I see the arm I shot off is still shot off."
  • (Boris The Animal) "Yes, my arm. We've thought about that moment every day for the last 40 years."
  • (Tommy Lee Jones and Josh Brolin) "Well, that's just not living a full life."
  • (Tommy Lee Jones and Josh Brolin) "Don't ask questions you don't want to know the answer to."
  • (Tommy Lee Jones and Josh Brolin) "You are suspended for two weeks."
  • (Will Smith) "Bulls***."
  • (Tommy Lee Jones and Josh Brolin) "Four weeks."
  • (Tommy Lee Jones and Josh Brolin) "There are things out there you don't need to know about."
  • (Will Smith) "That's not the lie you told me when you recruited me."
  • (Tommy Lee Jones and Josh Brolin) "I worked for Zed for over 40 years, and in all that time he never invited me to dinner. Heve never asked to me to his house to watch a game. He never shared a single detail of his personal life. Thank you."
  • (Emma Thompson and Alice Eve) "Thank you, Agent K. That was very moving."
  • (Will Smith) "That was your eulogy?"
  • (Tommy Lee Jones and Josh Brolin) "He was a good man."
  • (Emma Thompson and Alice Eve) "Ladies, gentlemen, other life forms, when I told the Felucian Zyglot about Zed's passing, she said something that I'm going to repeat. And I'm paraphrasing. Ahem."
  • (Emma Thompson and Alice Eve) "That's just so Zed."
  • (Tommy Lee Jones and Josh Brolin) "Do you know the most destructive force in the universe?"
  • (Will Smith) "Sugar?"
  • (Tommy Lee Jones and Josh Brolin) "Regret."
  • (Tommy Lee Jones and Josh Brolin) "Who's this Splky Bulba for?"
  • (Keone Young) "Nobody --"
  • (Tommy Lee Jones and Josh Brolin) "Boris the Animal: I blew off his arm and had him imprisoned at Lunamax. Biggest mistake I ever made."
  • (Will Smith) "Sorry, man. Was he innocent?"
  • (Tommy Lee Jones and Josh Brolin) "I should have killed him."
  • (Tommy Lee Jones and Josh Brolin) "Did you lose something over here hondo?"

Will Smith as Agent J

  • (Young Agent K) "Hey, slick. In the future, we haven't did the Texas Two-Step?"
  • (Will Smith) "Yes, sir."
  • (Will Smith) "Hey, how come I can remember K but nobody else does?"
  • (Michael Chernus) "Whoa, that means you were there."
  • (Will Smith) "I was where?"
  • (Michael Chernus) "If you survive you got to come back and tell me everything okay?"
  • (Will Smith) "Where was I?"
  • (Michael Chernus) "You got to go. Just go, go, go."
  • (Will Smith) "I was on my way to my girlfriend's house."
  • (Young Agent K) "What's your girlfriend's name?"
  • (Will Smith) "Shh --"
  • (Will Smith) "Darren."
  • (Young Agent K) "Schdarren?"
  • (Will Smith) "Hey, I saw you doing that whole future thing with the Colonel. What did you show him?"
  • (Michael Stuhlbarg) "Only what he needed to know."
  • (Will Smith) "I'm looking for K, have you seen him? Sort of a surly, older gentleman, smiles like this --"
  • (Emma Thompson and Alice Eve) "K's been dead for over forty years."
  • (Young Agent K) "Why don't you come with me to Room 43 for one final enquiry: an eye exam."
  • (Will Smith) "That's not an eye exam -- that's a big-ass neuralyzer."
  • (Young Agent K) "You sure have a lot of information for a fella who doesn't know anything."
  • (Young Agent K) "You said we don't talk, right? Go ahead, ask me any question. Anything you want, just as long as it doesn't have to do with the case -- just let her rip."
  • (Will Smith) "What's up with you and O?"
  • (Young Agent K) "Me and O?"
  • (Will Smith) "Yeah, you and O."
  • (Young Agent K) "All right, all right -- all right, this is it. A while back, I was assigned to keep tabs on a musician, Mick Jagger. He was in this British group, Rolling Stones --"
  • (Will Smith) "Rings a bell."
  • (Young Agent K) "We believed he's on the planet to breed with Earth women, so I was in London and that's when I met O. She's smart, funny -- great smile and we find ourselves in this pub, Whistler's Bar, warm beer and the worst food you ever ate. We just played darts till the sun came up, neither of us wanted to leave --"
  • (Will Smith) "What the hell happened to you, man?"
  • (Young Agent K) "I don't know, it hasn't happened yet? Come on, what about you slick? In the future you got yourself a girl?"
  • (Will Smith) "I got you."
  • (Will Smith) "That's a big phone. Don't hold it up to your head."
  • (Will Smith) "How's it going?"
  • (Michael Stuhlbarg) "How's it going? Well, that depends. For me personally, it's good. Things are good. Unless, of course, we're in the possible future where the muscle boy near the door gets into an argument with his girlfriend, which causes her to storm away and bump into the guy carrying the stuffed mushroom, who then dumps the tray onto those sailors on leave and a shoving match breaks out and they crash into the coffee table here. In which case, I gotta move my plate like right now."
  • (Michael Stuhlbarg) "-- or if it's the possible future, in which the pastrami sandwich I'm eating causes me gastric distress. But thankfully your friend, sir, will offer some of the antacids he carries in his right pocket. So I'll be good, I'll be good. Except in the case of the possible future where I have to leave in two and a half minutes, just before he has a chance to offer me the antacids. So, on the whole, I'd have to say, not good. I'm not good."
  • (Michael Stuhlbarg) "But that depends."
  • (Will Smith) "K."
  • (Will Smith) "K, if you see Boris tomorrow, kill him. Don't arrest him, just kill him."
  • (Will Smith) "Boris. Boris the Animal."
  • (Boris The Animal) "IT'S JUST BORIS."
  • (Will Smith) "Look, man, promise me that if my time comes you will give me a better speech than what you did for Z --"
  • (1969 NYPD Cop #1) "Where did you get the car?"
  • (1969 NYPD Cop #2) "And the suit?"
  • (Will Smith) "I stole them both."
  • (Will Smith) "Uh, car from your wife --"
  • (Will Smith) "-- suit from your grandmother."
  • (Will Smith) "O? No, I call ladies "O." To me O is feminine, and K is masculine. You know, I see a couple, I'm like, "O-K.""
  • (Young Agent K) "Okay, future man, where to?"
  • (Will Smith) "First of all, I'm gonna need my gun."
  • (Will Smith) "No no no, space gun."
  • (Will Smith) "You're gonna lose."
  • (Boris The Animal) "Let's agree to disagree."
  • (Will Smith) "Okay, you know how you're on a airplane and the flight attendant asks you to turn your cell phone off? And you're like, "I ain't turning my cell phone off. That ain't have nothing to do with no damn airplane." Well, this is what we get. That's what happens. It gets up there, bounces around on the satellite, then blam. Just turn your damn cell phone off. Now you're gonna drive off a cliff tonight 'cause your GPS don't work."
  • (Will Smith) "Knuckles, you know you're not supposed to be north of Canal Street."
  • (Unnamed) "Who's Knuckles?"
  • (Knuckles) "Relax, punk. They're looking for me, not you."
  • (Will Smith) "Crazy, right? Two grown men talking to the wall, wall talking back? It's a mess. Hey, don't even worry about it."
  • (Young Agent K) "They have these in the future?"
  • (Will Smith) "That's what I'm talking about."
  • (Will Smith) "Look man, I have my rights, and I demand to see a lawyer before you press the red button on that device."
  • (Will Smith) "That was a standard grade neuralyzer, but you're not going to remember that. Keep in mind, just because you see a black man driving a car, does not mean he stole it."
  • (Will Smith) "OK, I did steal this one; but not because I'm black."
  • (Will Smith) "Can you promise me something, if I go first, you'll do better than that at my funeral? Yeah, something like, uh: "J was a friend. Now there's a big part of me that's gone. Oh, J, all the things I should have said, except I was too old and craggy and surly and just tight. I was too tight. Now, I'm gonna just miss your caramel-brown skin.""
  • (Tommy Lee Jones and Josh Brolin) "I'll wing something."
  • (Will Smith) "Hey, ain't you coming?"
  • (Michael Stuhlbarg) "No, I'm done here. J, as soon as K blows Boris's arm off everything will be back to the way it was, K will not remember anything that happened here."
  • (Will Smith) "I got it: arm blown off, history's reset. Okay, thanks G."
  • (Michael Stuhlbarg) "I can never bear to watch this part --"
  • (Young Agent K) "Who are you, and what do you know?"
  • (Will Smith) "I'm an agent of Men in Black, but I'm from the future. We're partners, twenty-five years from now you're going to recruit me. And 14 years after, the guy you DIDN'T let me kill at Coney Island he escapes from prison, and jumps back in the past and unleashes a full-scale invasion of Earth. We have about 19 hours to catch him and kill him, so really we need to go right now."
  • (Young Agent K) "All right."
  • (Will Smith) "You need to turn the electricity on that damn thing. I can't taste my fricking tongue, K."
  • (Young Agent K) "How do you know my name?"
  • (Will Smith) "Who are we?"
  • (Tommy Lee Jones and Josh Brolin) "We are no-one. Our mission is to monitor extraterrestrial activity on Earth."
  • (Will Smith) "Hey man, heck, how old are you?"
  • (Young Agent K) "Twenty-nine."
  • (Will Smith) "You got some city miles on you --"
  • (Will Smith) "There's no such thing as time travel."
  • (Emma Thompson and Alice Eve) "Well, there is."
  • (Will Smith) "No. There's not. Because if there were, a class-one senior agent such as myself would have been made aware of it, wouldn't he have?"
  • (Emma Thompson and Alice Eve) "Were it not classified and way above his pay grade."
  • (Will Smith) "You know what? I need a pay raise."
  • (Will Smith) "All right, pay attention --"
  • (Will Smith) "Okay. You know how you kids won the goldfish in that little baggy at the school fair, and you didn't want that nasty thing in your house so you flushed it down the toilet? Well, this's what happened --"
  • (Will Smith) "Man, I was an agent for three years before I realized that all models were aliens."
  • (Young Agent K) "Look, slick, seeing I live past this, can you tell me whether me and O?"
  • (Will Smith) "A wise man told me once: don't ask questions you don't want the answer to."
  • (Young Agent K) "I said that, didn't I?"
  • (Will Smith) "I am getting too old for this. I can only imagine how YOU feel."
  • (Will Smith) "Ooh. You look like you come from the planet -- Damn."
  • (Will Smith) "I know what you're thinking: MIB, 3-D, we're going to be blowing stuff up and all that. But that's not really what we're doing right now. We're here for one purpose, and for one purpose only: Just to let you know that I'm about to make 3-D look good."
  • (Will Smith) "You know, we been doing some pretty smart stuff over the past day or so, how about we do something stupid? Let's go get some pie."
  • (Will Smith) "Is there anybody here who is NOT an alien?"

Bill Hader as Andy Warhol

  • (Bill Hader) "Who's that guy? Okay, don't tell me he's your new partner."
  • (Young Agent K) "Actually, he's my old partner. He travelled back from the future to save the planet --"
  • (Bill Hader) "Jesus. Stop, don't tell me. I don't wanna know."
  • (Bill Hader) "Dammit K, trying to blow my cover?"
  • (Will Smith) "Whoa, Andy Warhol's one of US?"
  • (Bill Hader) "Who's the dumbass?"
  • (Will Smith) "You know, I'd have no problem pimp-slapping the shiznit out of Andy Warhol."
  • (Bill Hader) "So what are you doin' on my turf, K?"
  • (Young Agent K) "Tracking a killer, a Bogladyte. We have reason to believe he's gonna hit here next, Glamourian."
  • (Bill Hader) "Glamourian?"
  • (Young Agent K) "Mm-hmmm."
  • (Bill Hader) "Right solar system, wrong planet. He's gotta be after the Arcanian."
  • (Young Agent K) "No, Arcanians are extinct --"
  • (Bill Hader) "Well, apparently they're not. One washed ashore last week. The whole Roswell circuit's all abuzz about it. Alien unicorn, last of its species. His name's Griffin, Griffin The Arcanian."
  • (Bill Hader) "K. I can't tell the women from the men."

Michael Stuhlbarg as Griffin

  • (Michael Stuhlbarg) "A miracle is something that seems impossible but happens anyway."
  • (Michael Stuhlbarg) "The bitterest truth is better than the sweetest lie."
  • (Michael Stuhlbarg) "Sir, if I may --"
  • (Michael Stuhlbarg) "Any future where you succeed, is one where you tell the truth."
  • (Will Smith) "The TRUTH?"
  • (Michael Stuhlbarg) "There's no other way for this to work, K has to be the one to go. K is the only one who can save the world."
  • (Will Smith) "If he does this, is there ANY future where he lives?"
  • (Michael Stuhlbarg) "Yes. But where there is death, there will always be death."
  • (Michael Stuhlbarg) "I lost my world. I don't want you to lose yours. It's only the most infinitesimal of chances, but if it works, it'll be my most favourite moment in human history."

Lanny Flaherty as Obadiah Price

  • (Lanny Flaherty) "Boris. Boris the Animal. We had a deal, remember?"
  • (Boris The Animal) "Obadiah Price -- yes, I did make you a promise."

Keone Young as Mr. Wu

  • (Keone Young) "That is an Earth fish. Very traditional in China. You arrest me, that's a hate crime."
  • (Tommy Lee Jones and Josh Brolin) "It would be if you were Chinese."
  • (Keone Young) "Come on, K, I got larva to feed."

Emma Thompson and Alice Eve as Agent O

  • (Emma Thompson and Alice Eve) "There was a spree of time-travel in the 1960s. It caused issues all over the continuum. So we imprisoned its handler, Obadiah Price, and had it wiped out completely."
  • (Emma Thompson and Alice Eve) "Somehow history has been rewritten. There has to be a reason this is happening, and K seems to be in the center of it."

Michael Chernus as Jeffrey Price

  • (Michael Chernus) "Do not lose that time device or you will be stuck in 1969. It wasn't the best time for your people. I'm just saying. It's a lot cooler, now."
  • (Will Smith) "How will I know if it works?"
  • (Michael Chernus) "You'll either know or you won't."
  • (Michael Chernus) "All right. All right. That's a real bummer about your buddy. I'm sure, he was, like, a real great guy, but in terms of the whole space-time continuum, your friend was a little blip on the historical radar."
  • (Michael Chernus) "Oh. That's a big blip."
  • (Michael Chernus) "This is the real deal. Time-jump gear. Very rare, very old. But first, we gotta get high."
  • (Will Smith) "Hey. No."
  • (Michael Chernus) "No. No, I mean, really high."
  • (Michael Chernus) "Okay. What's the plan?"
  • (Will Smith) "You're gonna send me back to July 15, 1969."
  • (Michael Chernus) "No, that's a stupid plan because I sent Boris to July 16th."
  • (Will Smith) "I'm not worried about that one. I'm gonna go back and kill the younger Boris before the older one even shows up."
  • (Michael Chernus) "That way neither of them will even exist. That's why you get to wear the black suit."
  • (Michael Chernus) "No? You're gonna leave me hanging. Okay. Oh, I just thought of something. You know, even way back then New York was a big-ish city. So I mean, how are you gonna really find him?"
  • (Will Smith) "On July 15th, Boris killed an alien, Roman the Fabulist, at Coney Island."
  • (Michael Chernus) "You're gonna get there first and be waiting for him? Dude, they should give you like two black suits."
  • (Will Smith) "My man, for real?"
  • (Michael Chernus) "Here, take this, and all you have to do is jump."
  • (Will Smith) "You want me to jump?"
  • (Michael Chernus) "Time jump."

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