Fun with Dick and Jane (2005 film) Quotes

Fun with Dick and Jane (2005 film) is a television show that appeared on TV in 1970 . Fun with Dick and Jane ended in 1970.

It features Jim Carrey as producer, Theodore Shapiro (composer) in charge of musical score, and Jerzy Zielinski as head of cinematography.

Fun with Dick and Jane (2005 film) is recorded in English and originally aired in United States. Each episode of Fun with Dick and Jane (2005 film) is 91 minutes long. Fun with Dick and Jane (2005 film) is distributed by Columbia Pictures.

Fun with Dick and Jane (2005 film) Quotes

• (Dick Harper) "Son of a bitch."
• (Jane Harper) "That f***er."
• (Dick Harper) "Hon, language."

• (Jack McCallister) "Did I get it?"
• (Jack's Assistant) "Now you did."

• (Frank Bascom) "Do you have any idea what I had to go through to get that form?"
• (Dick Harper) "No, let me guess, a fifth of SCOTCH?"

• (Ameribanx Bank Manager) "Let me get back to you. Excuse me."
• (Dick Harper) "Yes?"
• (Ameribanx Bank Manager) "May I help you?"
• (Dick Harper) "Vault Inspector"
• (Ameribanx Bank Manager) "What happened to Phil?"
• (Dick Harper) "Necrotizing Fasciitis Caused by an invasive streptococcus"
• (Ameribanx Bank Manager) "What?"
• (Dick Harper) "Flesh-eating disorder. Its all over the money. Might wanna wash your hands."

• (Garth) "Hey, how do you like the new wheels?"
• (Dick Harper) "Nice."
• (Garth) "Hooked up with a new company. Great benefits."
• (Dick Harper) "Yeah?"
• (Garth) "Yeah. They trade energy. It's called Enron."
• (Dick Harper) "Huh."

• (Dick Harper) "Hello. I'm a corporate puppet --"
• (Dick Harper) "-- and I'm going to need some more string, so that I can go on believing I'll be a real boy someday without bein' manipulative --"
• (Dick Harper) "by the bulls***."

• (Dick Harper) "No, I swear, I am an American citizen."
• (Unnamed) "Save it."
• (Dick Harper) "No, call my wife -- It's ringing"
• (Billy Harper) "Hola?"

• (Jane Harper) "I went to this Botox Experiment, and I had a little accident -- does it really look that bad?"
• (Dick Harper) "No. Just -- different."
• (Day Laborer) "Hey Dick, can we talk about these some other time?"

• (Jane Harper) "We might be in a little bit of a pickle, Dick."

• (Jack McCallister) "Dick Harper, Dick Harper, Dick Harper playing the harp. Harpo Marx playing the Jews harp. DH, DH. You're my Designated Hitter."

• (Dick Harper) "Indicted?"
• (Jane Harper) "Dick?"
• (Dick Harper) "Indicted."
• (Jane Harper) "Dick, its gonna' be alright."
• (Dick Harper) "Indicted, Indicted, I'm being Indicted."
• (Jane Harper) "Dick calm down."
• (Dick Harper) "I can't calm down, I'm being indicted --"

• (Dick Harper) "Globodyne is a consolidator of media properties. Globodyne is a consolidator of media properties. Consolidator. Consolidator."
• (Dick Harper) "Oh, no."
• (Unnamed) "Run, Dick, Run"
• (Dick Harper) "Globodyne's a consolidator of media properties and data retrieval with a focus in fiber-optic content provision. It's basically a synergy of Web-based and platform-based UNIX-driven delivery systems. OK, I made that last part up."

• (Billy Harper) "Don't take away my Telemundo."

• (Kostmart Training Leader) "I'll sell you my pee for a hundred dollars. Been off the pipe for two years."
• (Kostmart Training Leader) "Thank you Jesus."

• (Jane Harper) "Hector, what's going on? What, what happened?"
• (Hector) "Your check go bouncy-bounce. But it's okay, I heard what happened to your husband. Not everybody can afford landscaping like this."
• (Jane Harper) "Hector, please."
• (Hector) "I am sorry, Miss Jane."
• (Jane Harper) "Oh, no. No, no, no, no, NO. This is all- everything is all WRONG. I want this out. Roll it all up. I ordered Kentucky Bluegrass. This. Is. GREEN."

• (Disgruntled Kostmart Customer) "I saw you eyeballing me. All up in my goodies."

• (Jane Harper) "Our lawn was repossessed today. I didn't know they could even do that."

• (Dick Harper) "I'm pretty sure she's gonna notice her car isn't towed."
• (Frank Bascom) "Right, I'll stall her."

• (Dick Harper) "I got the lawn back."

• (Dick Harper) ""It has come to our attention that certain departments have begunn to run into situations." Situations."
• (Dick's Secretary) "The big boys want to see you upstairs."
• (Dick Harper) "Which floor? Twentieth?"
• (Dick Harper) "Twenty-sixth?"
• (Dick Harper) "Thirty-second?"
• (Dick Harper) "Not the 51st?"
• (Dick's Secretary) "Yes. Congratulations, Mr. Harper."
• (Dick Harper) "Uh, go ahead and wrap this up."
• (Dick's Secretary) "Ok."
• (Dick Harper) "How do I look?"
• (Dick's Secretary) "Great."
• (Dick Harper) "Anything in my teeth?"
• (Dick's Secretary) "No."
• (Dick Harper) "I need a paper bag."

• (Jane Harper) "My name is Jane and I'll be your instructor here today for beginners' Jee Kum Pow."

• (Dick Harper) "We're all just cavemen, Trying to protect our little patch of land. Well now I've got a club, and I'm gonna take what I need."

• (Oz Peterson) "Son of a bitch."

• (Dick Harper) "See, Jack? They love you now. Go to hell."

• (Dick Harper) "Are these non-fat muffins? ARE THESE NON-FAT MUFFINS?"
• (Coffee Shop Guy) "I-I-I think so --"
• (Dick Harper) "Oh, Gee, Hon, you gotta get some of those."

• (Unnamed) "A long, long time ago --"
• (Unnamed) "in the year 2000 --"
• (Unnamed) "Meet Dick"

• (Billy Harper) "What are you doing to the television?"

• (Dick Harper) "I've been terminated, bankrupted, deported and blackmailed because of you, and I'm not leaving here without your money."
• (Jack McCallister) "What are you gonna do, Dick? Shoot me if I don't approve that form?"
• (Dick Harper) "Write me a check."
• (Jack McCallister) "You are kidding me."
• (Jane Harper) "Dick, it's not going to do us any good. He's just going to cancel it the minute we walk out of here."
• (Dick Harper) "I don't care -- I don't care. I'm not walking out of this bank empty-handed."
• (Jack McCallister) "-- Alright. Alright, Dick, I'm gonna write you a check. I'm gonna need my hand back though."
• (Dick Harper) "Gladly."
• (Jack McCallister) "Alright, yes sir, I'm gonna write you that check, and what's more I'm not gonna cancel it as soon as I leave the bank because I think it takes alotta cojones to do what you two have done here today, and I admire that. So, here you go. Just a little something to show you what I think you're worth."
• (Jack McCallister) "Y'all take care now."

• (Billy Harper) "Mama quit her yob yayyyy."

• (Dick Harper) "We followed the rules, and we got screwed."

• (Dick Harper) "This squirrel died of natural causes."

• (Oz Peterson) "Honey? Honey. I love you."
• (Debbie) "You quitter. We had hostages."

Add or Update Quotes

If you have a quote to add or change and want to let us know, please fill in the form below. Include the time in the film/video if possible so we can find it.