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Ernest Scared Stupid Quotes

Ernest Scared Stupid is a television show that first aired in 1970 . Ernest Scared Stupid ended in 1970.

It features Stacy Williams as producer, Bruce Arntson in charge of musical score, and Hanania Baer as head of cinematography.

Ernest Scared Stupid is recorded in English and originally aired in United States. Each episode of Ernest Scared Stupid is 91 minutes long. Ernest Scared Stupid is distributed by Walt Disney Studios Motion Pictures.

The cast includes: Jim Varney as Ernest P. Worrell, Austin Nagler as Kenny, Eartha Kitt as Old Lady Hackmore, Shay Astar as Elizabeth, John Cadenhead as Tom Tulip, Daniel Butler as Cliff, and Esther Huston as Amanda.

Ernest Scared Stupid Quotes

Jim Varney as Ernest P. Worrell

  • (Jim Varney) "He must be a greasy spot in the road."
  • (Jim Varney) "How 'bout a bumper sandwich, Boogerlips?"
  • (Jim Varney) "He looked like a big giant Mr. Potato Head. Except he was shaped more like a watermelon."
  • (Jim Varney) "How about a little Miak."
  • (Trantor the Troll) "Miak?"
  • (Jim Varney) "Yeah, Miak. I bet you thought I couldn't find any at this time of the year, well a little resourceful for ya, a little to light on my feet. Eat Miak and die."
  • (Jim Varney) "I never knew when to quit. Just ask my fourth grade teacher."
  • (Jim Varney) "Boy, Jimmy. When you play charades you play for keeps. Knowhatimean?"
  • (Jim Varney) "We have nothing to fear but fear itself, plus the known fact that Old Lady Hackmore will turn us into a couple of drooling, red eyed zombies if she catches us here."
  • (Jim Varney) "Well, nobody home, I guess they're out robbing graves or biting the heads off chickens or whatever's in Voodoo Vogue."
  • (Trantor the Troll) "You will die for the disgrace of your forefathers."
  • (Jim Varney) "I didn't have four fathers. I only had one father and I didn't know him that well."
  • (Jim Varney) "Sheriff Binder open up. It was awful, the thunder and the lightning, and it had great big teeth and things on its ears like this. It was at least this big and at least this long."
  • (Daniel Butler) "Whoa, whoa, Ernest, what's going on?"
  • (Esther Huston) "Ernest do you know what time it is?"
  • (Jim Varney) "Maybe Old Lady Hackmore was right, maybe it WAS a troll. Luckily I was there to beat it within an inch of its face."
  • (Daniel Butler) "Old Lady Hackmore?"
  • (Jim Varney) "Yeah the kids and I built a treehouse out there and she got REAL STEAMED."
  • (Esther Huston) "You took Kenny and the kids out there? Trespassing on an old lady's property?"
  • (Daniel Butler) "Yeah, but what happened?"
  • (Jim Varney) "Sheriff, I saw a troll. I really saw a troll."
  • (Austin Nagler) "Dad, something really weird WAS happening in those woods tonight."
  • (Jim Varney) "Yeah, you gotta do something, Sheriff."
  • (Daniel Butler) "Now calm down, Ernest, you probably just had a bad dream. So pinch yourself."
  • (Daniel Butler) "and go home."
  • (Jim Varney) "Oww. I'm not dreaming, this really hurts."
  • (Jim Varney) "Miak."
  • (Jim Varney) "Pretty soon the kids won't have to worry about eating their Brussel sprouts because the Brussel sprouts will be eating them."
  • (Jim Varney) "It looked like a great big Mr. Potato Head only it was the size of a watermelon."
  • (Jim Varney) "Nuh uh, ain't no trees in Botswana, nuh uh, I know, I AM a Botswanian lumberjack, and I ain't never had a job --"
  • (Jim Varney) "You'd better stay away. I know jujitsu, kung fu, karate, tai chi, and I saw "Hulkamania" three times. Once in slow-mo."
  • (Jim Varney) "No no don't stick my head in those gears."
  • (Jim Varney) "But it's me or you"
  • (Jim Varney) "But I have a family at the doll factory."
  • (Jim Varney) "I'll send them a nice card"
  • (Jim Varney) "You'll never get away with this Ernest I know where you live."
  • (Jim Varney) "Help, help. May day. May day. Christmas Day. Colombus Day."
  • (Jim Varney) "Rimshot. Oh my God."
  • (Austin Nagler) "Don't worry, Ernest, we'll figure out some way to beat this."
  • (Jim Varney) "I'll tell you how we beat this thing, I'll tell you how we beat it. My great great granddaddy put him in that tree and so can I. Somebody with a runny nose is going to die."
  • (Jim Varney) "Oh, I sure hope you're from Keebler."
  • (Jim Varney) "Be grateful, little trolls in China don't even get milk."
  • (Jim Varney) "Make sure your shoes are on the right feet and all your furniture's up against the WALLLL."

John Cadenhead as Tom Tulip

  • (John Cadenhead) "Do rattlesnakes kiss carefully?"

Eartha Kitt as Old Lady Hackmore

  • (Eartha Kitt) "Sometimes you've got to do what YOU know is right, no matter what anybody tells you."
  • (Eartha Kitt) "Heaven help us, I felt it, Heaven help us, them that die will be the lucky ones."
  • (Eartha Kitt) "Listen to the last two lines of the troll's poem. There is one who can stop us if he will dare, With the heart of a child and a mother's care. So we need a heart,"
  • (Eartha Kitt) "a child's heart."
  • (Eartha Kitt) "They will have to load you and the rest of this backward town onto a meat wagon with a pitch fork."
  • (Eartha Kitt) "You are the 7th son of the 7th son, you are the baby, you are the boy, it is YOUR legacy. You are the great redneck hope."

Austin Nagler as Kenny

  • (Austin Nagler) "Isn't Joey here yet?"
  • (Shay Astar) "No, Joey never got home last night."
  • (Austin Nagler) "What? What're you talking about?"
  • (Shay Astar) "You said that Ernest came to your house last night yelling something about trolls, you think?"
  • (Austin Nagler) "Come on, there's no such thing as trolls."
  • (Shay Astar) "But Ernest saw something out of the tree, and he's never lied to us."
  • (Austin Nagler) "Oh great, I have to defend the fort with a multiple personality."

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