Drop Dead Gorgeous (film) Quotes

Drop Dead Gorgeous (film) is a television show that first aired in 1970 . Drop Dead Gorgeous completed its run in 1970.

It features Gavin Polone as producer, Mark Mothersbaugh in charge of musical score, and Michael Spiller as head of cinematography.

Drop Dead Gorgeous (film) is recorded in English and originally aired in United States. Each episode of Drop Dead Gorgeous (film) is 98 minutes long. Drop Dead Gorgeous (film) is distributed by New Line Cinema.

The cast includes: Allison Janney as Loretta, Ellen Barkin as Annette Atkins, Kirsten Dunst as Amber Atkins, Kirstie Alley as Gladys Leeman, Nora Dunn as Colleen Douglas, Mindy Sterling as Iris Clark, Alexandra Holden as Mary Johanson, Amy Adams as Leslie Miller, Brittany Murphy as Lisa Swenson, Laurie Sinclair as Michelle Johnson, Will Sasso as Hank Vilmes, Mike McShane as Harold Vilmes, Mo Gaffney as Terry Macey, Sarah Stewart as Jenelle Betz, Richard Narita as Mr. Howard, John T. Olson as Pat, Matt Malloy as John, Brooke Elise Bushman as Tammy Curry, and Sam McMurray as Lester Leeman.

Drop Dead Gorgeous (film) Quotes

Matt Malloy as John

• (Voice of Documentarian) "So you've, uh, you've judged a lot of pageants over the years?"
• (Matt Malloy) "No, no, no way, no. Never judged a pageant before in my life. Mm-mm. No way. Never been around young girls. I mean, even if I was, I mean, why would I wanna be, y'know? I-I don't get off on that kinda thing and that's really why you're askin', right?"
• (Matt Malloy) "Someone say somethin'?"

Kirsten Dunst as Amber Atkins

• (Kirsten Dunst) "That's my mom."
• (Ellen Barkin) "Hey, Amber, did ya get my smokes?"
• (Kirsten Dunst) "Oh, yah, I'll get 'em in a sec."
• (Ellen Barkin) "Aw, s***."
• (Kirsten Dunst) "Oh, they're from Los Angeles. They wanted to see my room and film me for their movie."
• (Ellen Barkin) "Yah, well, if they ask you to take your top off, get the money first."
• (Ellen Barkin) "And go get my smokes."

• (Kirsten Dunst) "I just wanted to compete."
• (Brittany Murphy) "I can't believe this is happening. I can't believe she said --"
• (Brittany Murphy) "Amber, here, my jacket, take it, cos you know I know I got my costume OK'd a month ago before the pageant, you can wear it. Come on, put it on, here --"
• (Laurie Sinclair) "Oh wow -- Lisa, I don't think you should do this."
• (Amy Adams) "They're never gonna let you perform naked. I asked."
• (Brittany Murphy) "Shut up, you guys."
• (Kirsten Dunst) "No --"
• (Brittany Murphy) "Amber, I'm not gonna to win. OK? And let's be honest our family only needs one Liza and and Peter's got much better legs than me"
• (Kirsten Dunst) "Your parents'll kill ya."
• (Brittany Murphy) "Come on, I love 'em -- And you know that they only had me cos Peter needed that kidney."

• (Kirsten Dunst) "Oh, my God. Jesus Christ on a cross. Look, number one rule in a funeral home: never sneak up on the living. You never know who might have an enbalming needle or a skull saw in their hand. Mr. Larson's son learned the hard way. He's buried next to my grandpa."

• (Kirsten Dunst) "Oh yeah. Guys get out of Mount Rose all the time on hockey scholarships -- or prison."

• (Kirsten Dunst) "Ummm. I'm quitting the pagent."
• (Allison Janney) "You're WHAT?"
• (Kirsten Dunst) "I'm quitting the --"
• (Allison Janney) "I heard you. I was just trying to get you to change your mind. Amber, the woman clung to your tap shoes while she was flying through the air like a god**** lawn dart."

• (Becky Ann Leeman) "What? Oh my God, lights, camera and me without a stitch of makeup on. What are you guys doing here?"
• (Kirsten Dunst) "What are you doing here?"
• (Becky Ann Leeman) "Oh, Amber, like you're the only one who visits Mary."
• (Alexandra Holden) "Who are you?"
• (Becky Ann Leeman) "Who are you? Oh, Mary, you kill me."
• (Becky Ann Leeman) "She always says that, it's a little game we play, every week, same dippy little look on her face, "Who are you? Who are you?" Just like that. It's me, Becky. Mmmm, and I brought your favourites."
• (Kirsten Dunst) "Real nice, Becky, she's anorexic."
• (Becky Ann Leeman) "She's skinny, Amber, not deaf."

• (Kirsten Dunst) "I don't eat shellfish. Mom always says, "Don't ever eat nothin' that can carry its house around with it. Who knows the last time it's been cleaned." She should know."

• (Female Reporter #2) "Amber, how do you feel?"
• (Kirsten Dunst) "Well, I feel like I need to take a shower."
• (Female Reporter #2) "Honey, is this the best day of your life?"
• (Kirsten Dunst) "Yeah -- I wish my mom was here, though."
• (Allison Janney) "You can wave hi, say hi to her."
• (Kirsten Dunst) "Hi mom."
• (Allison Janney) "Hey."
• (Ellen Barkin) "Hi, monkey."
• (Allison Janney) "I got some."

• (Kirsten Dunst) "Hi. I'm Amber Atkins, and I'm signing up cause uh my two favorite people in the whole world competed in pageants: my mom and Diane Sawyer -- Course, I hope I end up a little more like Diane Sawyer than my mom."

• (Kirsten Dunst) "Mom? MOM?"
• (Fireman) "Whoa, whoa, whoa -- you family?"
• (Allison Janney) "No, she's just yelling, "Mom, mom," because she has Tourettes. She's Annette's kid dips***."

• (Brett Clemmens) "Oh man -- you got some lutefisk in your hair."
• (Kirsten Dunst) "Then it must be Wednesday."
• (Iona Hildebrandt) "Lutefisk is codfish that's been salted and soaked in lye for a week or so. It's best with lots of butter."

• (Kirsten Dunst) "Loretta, never have kids."
• (Allison Janney) "Oh, honey, God bless ya for thinking I still could."

• (Lars Larson) "Amber, I need Stella now. The family's steaming like a cowpie in July. Said she doesn't look nothing like the picture they gave you."
• (Kirsten Dunst) "Sorry, I just thought she might not want to meet her maker looking like a cheap whore."
• (Lars Larson) "Well, this cheap whore is that family's loving mother."

Ellen Barkin as Annette Atkins

• (Ellen Barkin) "I am reaching the point where I would kill someone for the nicotine under their fingernails."

• (Ellen Barkin) "I shoved your tap shoes in my panties before I was blown out of the house. You go find the guy who cut 'em off."

• (Ellen Barkin) "Honey, honey, come talk to Mommy. I promise, whatever it is, I won't be mad."
• (Kirsten Dunst) "Okay, I'm quitting the pageant."
• (Ellen Barkin) "What?"
• (Ellen Barkin) "Oh, could you excuse us for a moment? Loretta, take the guys outside, please. Now, sit your skinny little ass down."

• (Ellen Barkin) "I wish my mom was here."
• (Allison Janney) "You can wave Hi, Annette you hear that?"
• (Kirsten Dunst) "Hi, Monkey."
• (Allison Janney) "I got some"

• (Ellen Barkin) "Ow. What did they have a sale on dull needles at K-Mart?"
• (Candy Striper) "I just need one more do-over."

Allison Janney as Loretta

• (Candy Striper) "Hello Miss Sad Pants, and her friend, Serious Sally. How about a nice cool mint to help turn those frowns upside down?"
• (Allison Janney) "Do you think a nice cool mint would help if I shoved your head up your ass?"

• (Allison Janney) "Say, you boys been to the Leemans'?"
• (Ellen Barkin) "Shut it, Loretta."
• (Allison Janney) "If ya have, you got all the pictures of the winner you need."
• (Ellen Barkin) "Shut up, Loretta."
• (Allison Janney) "Let's just say who should win, who deserves to win, is Amber."
• (Ellen Barkin) "Who don't you just pin a big old target on your ass?"
• (Allison Janney) "She's the prettiest, ya know. Best damn tapper. The most smartest."
• (Ellen Barkin) "Most smartest? Oh, that's great, you're real educated. Most smartest. Get a picture of that, most smartest."
• (Allison Janney) "Most smartest."

• (Allison Janney) "Your ma did want you to have this, though, since your other one got toasted an all."
• (Kirsten Dunst) "Oh, my God. It's just like Diane Sawyer's."
• (Allison Janney) "Yah?"
• (Kirsten Dunst) "Oh. Of course it's not a size 10. Diane was little hippy then."
• (Allison Janney) "Not our girl."
• (Kirsten Dunst) "Oh, no."

• (Allison Janney) "What is wrong with you?"
• (Kirsten Dunst) "I don't know. I just didn't wanna win like this."
• (Allison Janney) "You stop right there. You are a good person. Good things happen to good people."
• (Kirsten Dunst) "Really?"
• (Allison Janney) "No. It's pure bulls***, sweetie. You're lucky as hell, so you might as well enjoy it."
• (Kirsten Dunst) "Okay."
• (Allison Janney) "Do you guys want some shots? I'm buyin'."

• (Allison Janney) "Are we on 'Cops' again?"

• (Allison Janney) "Can one of you boys give me a ride home?"
• (Ellen Barkin) "Don't fall for it. She lives two trailers down."
• (Allison Janney) "So? Be real easy."
• (Ellen Barkin) "Go on home, Loretta. Come on. Go on, go on the party's over."

• (Allison Janney) "Why do I think Becky'll win? You're talking about the richest family in a small town. It's front page news when one of them takes a s***."

• (Allison Janney) "Did they hear us?"

Alexandra Holden as Mary Johanson

(We don't have any quotes for this character)

Kirstie Alley as Gladys Leeman

• (Voice of Documentarian) "So what was the theme of the pageant last year?"
• (Kirstie Alley) "Oh, that was "Buy American""
• (Voice of Documentarian) "And the year before that was?"
• (Kirstie Alley) ""USA is A-OK.""
• (Voice of Documentarian) "And can you remember the theme of your favorite pageant?"
• (Kirstie Alley) "Can I? "Amer-I-Can." People ask me where I get this, I don't know, it's -- maybe a gift from God or somethin'."

• (Kirstie Alley) "He sells reproductions. His furniture's as fake as my orgasms."

• (Kirstie Alley) "Rebecca Ann Leeman, what's going -- You are the one that wanted this, now get up there. I don't care if you have to ride this thing side-saddle like a horse, get up there."
• (Becky Ann Leeman) "It smells funny. Like gasoline."
• (Kirstie Alley) "Oh, for Christ's sake. Everything smells like that in Mexico."
• (Becky Ann Leeman) "My dress will reek, Mother."
• (Kirstie Alley) "You listen to me now missy, this thing cost your dad a pretty penny, so you get your ass up there. And show me some teeth."
• (Kirstie Alley) "Lovely, baby."

• (Kirstie Alley) "And can you believe it, they still fit."
• (Allison Janney) "She had a big ass then, she's got a big ass now."

• (Kirstie Alley) "Gosh darn it. Hello, Father Donegan; Sidewalks? Sidewalks?"
• (Kirstie Alley) "Iris, stop it. It's not his fault, the communal wine just proves too tempting for some of them."
• (Mindy Sterling) "And that's why we Lutherans use grape Kool-Aid for the blood of Christ."

• (Kirstie Alley) "You'd think they'd have the parking lot of America to go with the Mall of America."
• (Mindy Sterling) "That's a $200 fine."
• (Kirstie Alley) "I told ya I would move the car if a cripple came. Now just run in the store and pick out some outfits."

• (Kirstie Alley) "Oh, my baby -- Oh my God, the swan ate my baby."

• (Kirstie Alley) "Our 2nd runner-up and winner of a $50 scholarship to the Vo-Tech of her choice is Leslie Miller."

• (Kirstie Alley) "American Teen Princesses do not cross their legs like streetwalkers."
• (Kirstie Alley) "Excuse me, Miss Penthouse '98, put your kness together. I could drive a boat show in there."

• (Voice of Documentarian) "Do you think that most people would say that teenage beauty pageants are a good idea?"
• (Kirstie Alley) "Oh yeah, sure. I know what some of your big city, no-bra-wearing, hairy-legged women libbers might say. They might say that a pageant is old-fashioned and demeaning to the girls."
• (Mindy Sterling) "What's sick is women dressing like men."
• (Kirstie Alley) "You betcha, Iris. No, I think you boys are gonna find something a litle bit different here in Mount Rose. For one thing, we're all God-fearing folk, every last one of us. And you will not find a "back room" in our video store. No, no, that filth is better left to the sin cities."
• (Mindy Sterling) "AKA Minneapolis Saint Paul."

Nora Dunn as Colleen Douglas

• (Nora Dunn) "I can sum up our entire philosophy with this glass. I can look at it and say it's half-full, which in the beauty pageant biz means "Where the hell's my waiter?""

• (Nora Dunn) "Stop with the friggin' Marco Polo or I'll come over there and rip your fat little heads off."

• (Nora Dunn) "People, people; wait, wait a minute, here. Uh, while we haven't ruled out sabotage from neighboring state pageants; Iowa, Wisconsin, North Dakota --"
• (Mo Gaffney) "Yeah."
• (Nora Dunn) "Dakota."
• (Mo Gaffney) "Ohio --"
• (Nora Dunn) "That bitch from --"
• (Mo Gaffney) "What?"
• (Nora Dunn) "Wisconsin."
• (Mo Gaffney) "All right, then."
• (Nora Dunn) "The bitch."
• (Mo Gaffney) "The important thing is that we have a winner --"

Mike McShane as Harold Vilmes

• (Mike McShane) "Are you Amber Atkins?"
• (Kirsten Dunst) "Yes, yes I am. Thank you. Hello."
• (Mike McShane) "Name and spell all the United States in alphabetical order."
• (Kirsten Dunst) "Seriously?"

Brittany Murphy as Lisa Swenson

• (Lisa Swenson's Father) "I hope it was worth it."
• (Brittany Murphy) "Dad, it was worth it. Amber shoulda won."
• (Lisa Swenson's Father) "Yeah, well, I'll tell you one thing, Peter never would have pulled a shenanigan like this."
• (Brittany Murphy) "Well, you know what, Dad? You know what? Peter's gay."
• (Brittany Murphy) "GAY."
• (Lisa Swenson's Father) "What?"

• (Brittany Murphy) "I fell in love with the big apple last summer when I was visiting my brother Peter there. He followed his dream all the way to New York -- Wait, this is Peter as Liza. This is him as Madonna --"
• (Brittany Murphy) "This is Barbara."

• (Brittany Murphy) "Why? Well, ah, it's kind of like askin' why all the guys chew Copenhagen, you know? I mea; If you're 17, and you're not a total fry, it's just what you do."

Brooke Elise Bushman as Tammy Curry

• (Brooke Elise Bushman) "This one's for varsity soccer, I'm captain. I run track and, uh, right here, I'm the new president of the Lutheran Sisterhood Gun Club."

Mindy Sterling as Iris Clark

• (Mindy Sterling) "Amber, I'm sorry, I really am, but you know the rules. All talent costumes have to be OK'd by Gladys before the pageant."
• (Kirsten Dunst) "But doesn't someone taking your costume so you can't complete overrule that rule?"
• (Mindy Sterling) "Amber, I'm sorry, I don't make up the rules."
• (Kirsten Dunst) "Oh. This -- This is bulls***."
• (Mindy Sterling) "Amber Atkins, that is not American Teen Princess language."
• (Kirsten Dunst) "Good, cos this isn't an American Teen Princess Pageant. This is -- This is -- This is Nazi Germany."
• (Mindy Sterling) "Where do they get this stuff?"

Richard Narita as Mr. Howard

(We don't have any quotes for this character)

Sam McMurray as Lester Leeman

• (Sam McMurray) "Beautiful as a whore's ass today, huh, boys?"

Amy Adams as Leslie Miller

• (Amy Adams) "Hey. Hey. I got second runner up. I got second place."
• (John T. Olson) "Third."
• (Amy Adams) "Huh?"
• (John T. Olson) "Third."
• (Amy Adams) "No, I got --"
• (Amy Adams) "Bye."

• (Amy Adams) "Roll him over. Lay him flat. Pin his shoulders to the mat. Goooo Muskies. Yeah."

• (Voice of Documentarian) "So, just tell us your name, and why you're signing up for the pageant."
• (Amy Adams) "Ok -- Hi -- I'm Leslie Miller -- and I'm signing up 'cause -- oh -- I always watch the pageants on TV and my boyfriend thinks I'll win"
• (Amy Adams) "Hi Pat. GO MUSKIES WOO."

• (Amy Adams) "Oh yeah -- really nervous -- it's been about, 2 months. I haven't told my boyfriend yet. How did you know?"
• (Amy Adams) "OH. You mean about the pageant. Yeah."

Will Sasso as Hank Vilmes

(We don't have any quotes for this character)

Mo Gaffney as Terry Macey

• (Mo Gaffney) "And you are --"
• (Kirsten Dunst) "Mount Rose American Teen Princess."
• (Mo Gaffney) "Funny, you don't look dead."

• (Mo Gaffney) "Somebody call a doctor."
• (Nora Dunn) "A doctor? Somebody call a priest."

Sarah Stewart as Jenelle Betz

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