Death Becomes Her Quotes

Death Becomes Her is a TV show that appeared on TV in 1970 . Death Becomes Her ended in 1970.

It features Robert Zemeckis as producer, Alan Silvestri in charge of musical score, and Dean Cundey as head of cinematography.

Death Becomes Her is recorded in English and originally aired in United States. Each episode of Death Becomes Her is 104 minutes long. Death Becomes Her is distributed by Universal Studios.

The cast includes: Meryl Streep as Madeline Ashton, Isabella Rossellini as Lisle Von Rhuman, Meryl Streep as Madeleine, Isabella Rossellini as Lisle Von Rhoman, Bruce Willis as Ernest Menville, Goldie Hawn as Helen, Adam Storke as Dakota, Meryl Streep as Madeline, Michelle Johnson as Anna, Goldie Hawn as Helen Sharp, Bruce Willis as Ernest, Isabella Rossellini as Lisle, Ian Ogilvy as Chagall, Sydney Pollack as Rose, Alaina Reed Hall as Psychologist, John Ingle as Eulogist, and Mary Ellen Trainor as Vivian Adams.

Death Becomes Her Quotes

Meryl Streep as Madeline Ashton

• (Meryl Streep) "Check ok?"
• (Isabella Rossellini) "Fine."

• (Meryl Streep) "Who cares how I played? I won."
• (Bruce Willis) "I'll just be upstairs --"
• (Goldie Hawn) "That's 'cause you could raise your legs higher than anyone."

• (Meryl Streep) "You're a fraud, Helen. You're a walking lie and I can see right -- THROUGH YOU."

• (Meryl Streep) "Ernest -- my ass. I can see -- my ASS."
• (Bruce Willis) "And there's something really wrong with your neck too."

• (Meryl Streep) "Ernest. You pushed me down the stairs."

• (Meryl Streep) "Dead? Ernest is dead? Everybody's dead."

• (Meryl Streep) "You're dressed. Special occasion?"

• (Meryl Streep) "Could you just not breathe?"

• (Meryl Streep) "I -- fell down the stairs"
• (Emergency Room Doctor) "Whoopsie."

• (Meryl Streep) "Look at you. You have a -- waist."

• (Meryl Streep) "Who is the little piece of meat?"

• (Meryl Streep) ""Forever Young?" --"
• (Sydney Pollack) "I like that title."
• (Meryl Streep) "Ah, forever young -- and eternally fat --"

• (Meryl Streep) "You should learn not to compete with me. I always win."
• (Goldie Hawn) "You may have always won, but you never played fair."
• (Meryl Streep) "Who cares how I played? I won."

• (Meryl Streep) "Do you know that they do to soft, bald, overweight Republicans in prison, Ernest?"

• (Meryl Streep) "Oh, for Christ's sake, at least lie quickly."
• (Adam Storke) "I'm trying to."

• (Meryl Streep) "Are you listening to me? Do you even care? You just stand there with your 22-year-old skin and your tits like rocks and laugh, and --"

• (Meryl Streep) "Wrinkled, wrinkled little star -- hope they never see the scars."

• (Meryl Streep) "Has that ever worked? When you ask me where I last saw something?"
• (Goldie Hawn) "Yes."
• (Meryl Streep) "When?"
• (Goldie Hawn) "When you lost your index finger."
• (Meryl Streep) "I didn't lose it, it broke off."
• (Goldie Hawn) "That's because you cracked your knuckles all the time --"
• (Goldie Hawn) "Help me."
• (Meryl Streep) "Do you remember where you parked the car?"

• (Meryl Streep) "Oh, it's you."
• (Bruce Willis) "Fine, dear, thank you, like a rock."

• (Meryl Streep) "I just want you to know one thing --"
• (Meryl Streep) "You brought this on yourself."
• (Bruce Willis) "Madeleine."

• (Meryl Streep) "Bottoms up."
• (Isabella Rossellini) "Now, a warning."
• (Meryl Streep) "NOW a warning?"

• (Meryl Streep) "Tell me, doctor. Do you think I'm starting to need you?"

Isabella Rossellini as Lisle Von Rhuman

• (Isabella Rossellini) "He won't get far. Not at his age."

• (Isabella Rossellini) "You are like Don Quixote, tilting at Nature's windmills."

• (Isabella Rossellini) "How old would you guess I am? C'mon, don't try to flatter me."
• (Meryl Streep) "Thirty-eight?"
• (Meryl Streep) "TWENTY-eight -- no, twenty-three --"

• (Isabella Rossellini) "Go on -- Drink it -- It is the completion of your life's work. You gave other people youth and wasted your own. Drink. And you will be able to work again forever. Drink -- drink, Dr. Menville. You owe yourself another chance. Drink. It's the right choice. The only choice. Drink. SEMPRE VIVE. LIVE FOREVER."
• (Bruce Willis) "Then what?"
• (Isabella Rossellini) "What?"
• (Bruce Willis) "Then what happens?"
• (Isabella Rossellini) "What?"
• (Bruce Willis) "I don't want to live forever. I mean, it sounds good, but what am I gonna do? What if I get bored?"
• (Isabella Rossellini) "What?"
• (Bruce Willis) "And what if I get lonely? Who am I gonna hang around with, Madeleine and Helen?"

• (Isabella Rossellini) "Go on -- Drink it -- It is the completion of your life's work. You gave other people youth, and wasted your own. Drink. And you will be able to work again- forever. Drink -- Drink, Dr. Menville -- You owe yourself another chance. Drink. It's the right choice. The only choice. Drink. SEMPRE VIVE. LIVE FOREVER."

• (Isabella Rossellini) "We are creatures of the spring, you and I."

• (Isabella Rossellini) "But you must make me a promise. The secret that we share must never become public. You may continue your career for ten years. Ten years of perfect, unchanged beauty. But at the end of that time, before people start to become suspicious, you have to disappear from public view forever. You can retire, you can stage your own phony death, or -- as one of my clients simply said, I want to be alone."
• (Meryl Streep) "No. She --"

• (Isabella Rossellini) "Drink that potion, and you'll never grow even one day older. Don't drink it, and continue to watch yourself rot."

• (Isabella Rossellini) "Make some room for my friend, for Chrissake. But -- keep your ass handy."

• (Isabella Rossellini) "I hope you don't mind that Harry and Dick had to dress you -- You were inproperly attired, for the occasion."
• (Bruce Willis) "What occasion?"
• (Isabella Rossellini) "I'm throwing a party upstairs -- I throw one every Spring, for my clients."
• (Bruce Willis) "All right -- ok -- what do you want with me?"
• (Isabella Rossellini) "For you -- I'd like to give a present -- The gift of life and youth, forever --"

• (Isabella Rossellini) "You're scared as Hell -- of yourself. Of the body you once knew."
• (Meryl Streep) "I beg your pardon?"
• (Isabella Rossellini) "I am the one who understands. I am the one who knows your secret."

Goldie Hawn as Helen

• (Goldie Hawn) "Oh, gosh, I'm glad you came. I didn't know if you would. I spoke to my PR woman and she said Madeleine Ashton goes to the opening of an envelope. Oh, those people can be so cruel."
• (Meryl Streep) "Mmmm."
• (Goldie Hawn) "I fired her."
• (Meryl Streep) "Oh."
• (Goldie Hawn) "Well, I almost fired her."

• (Goldie Hawn) "She married a brilliant surgeon, and turned him into an undertaker."

• (Goldie Hawn) "Madeleine. I need to speak to Madeleine."
• (Bruce Willis) "She's not here."
• (Goldie Hawn) "Oh, thank god."

• (Goldie Hawn) "Oh ok. Well if she's not dead, you tell her to come down here, come right up to me and kiss me on the --"
• (Meryl Streep) "Kiss you on the what?"
• (Goldie Hawn) "Mad?"
• (Meryl Streep) "Hel --"

• (Goldie Hawn) "Ernest, ask me to go. Ask me to leave this house immediately."
• (Bruce Willis) "You just got here."

• (Goldie Hawn) "It's alive."
• (Goldie Hawn) "And it's beautiful --"

• (Goldie Hawn) "En garde. Bitch."
• (Bruce Willis) "Girls, girls. Let's just calm down. I'm sure we can settle this peacefully and nego -- WHOA."

• (Goldie Hawn) "You're a powerful sexual being, Ernest."
• (Bruce Willis) "I am?"
• (Goldie Hawn) "Yes, you are. If I never told you before, it was because I wasn't the sort of girl who could say the word "sexual" without blushing. Well I can now. Sexual -- sensual -- sexy -- sex -- sex -- sex --"

• (Goldie Hawn) "That was totally uncalled for."

• (Goldie Hawn) "She was a homebreaker. She was a man-eater. And she was a bad actress."

• (Goldie Hawn) "Look at me, Ernest. Just look at me. I'm soaking wet."

• (Goldie Hawn) "You have no talent for poverty."

• (Goldie Hawn) "I will not speak to you 'til you put your head on straight."

• (Goldie Hawn) "By the time they perform the autopsy, the narconal will be completely dissolved leaving only traces of alcohol. She'll be classified as just "another drunk-driver". They'll check her blood alcohol."
• (Coroner) ".40 -- She had it coming."
• (Goldie Hawn) "And think nothing more of it."
• (Goldie Hawn) "The case is closed, Madeline is dead, and we're free."

• (Goldie Hawn) "We'll make it look like she's had just a little bit too much to drink --"

Bruce Willis as Ernest Menville

• (Bruce Willis) "Oh my god --"
• (Isabella Rossellini) "Oh. Thank you."

• (Bruce Willis) "Life in prison? Know what that means to a person in your condition?"
• (Goldie Hawn) "So negative. Let me enjoy the moment."
• (Bruce Willis) "What about the neighbors?"
• (Goldie Hawn) "Neighbors? In 12 years in Los Angeles, have you ever seen a neighbor?"

• (Goldie Hawn) "Where is she."
• (Bruce Willis) "Oh my gosh; Helen. What are you doing here?"
• (Goldie Hawn) "What's that on your hands; blood?"
• (Bruce Willis) "Paint."
• (Goldie Hawn) "Paint? What would you be doing that you have paint on your hands?"
• (Bruce Willis) "Painting."
• (Goldie Hawn) "Ernest; are you doing something funny with Madeline?"
• (Bruce Willis) "Define "funny"."

• (Emergency Room Doctor) "I tell you what, kids, it's, uh, odd thing here. Your wrist, uh, far as I can tell, is, uh, fractured in three places. Uh, and you've shattered, uh, two vertebrae, though I can't be certain without an X-ray -- The bone protrusion through the skin; that's not a good sign. You're body temperature is below 80, and your, your, your heart's stopped beating."
• (Bruce Willis) "What the hell does that mean?"
• (Emergency Room Doctor) "Exactly. What -- what -- I'm going to get a second opinion."
• (Meryl Streep) "Well, it could be worse."

• (Bruce Willis) "Life has turned out as quite a party."
• (Goldie Hawn) "You used to hate parties."
• (Bruce Willis) "That was when I was old. You should see me now."
• (Goldie Hawn) "I didn't know you were so unhappy."

• (Bruce Willis) "'Til death do us part. Well, you girls are dead. And I'm parting."

• (Bruce Willis) "Ah. Wha-what are you doing?"
• (Isabella Rossellini) "I'm loving you."

• (Bruce Willis) "Is it up yet?"

• (Bruce Willis) "Well, from now on, I'm going to be the kind of idiot I want to be."

• (Bruce Willis) "Do you know what they call someone who sticks by their word no matter what? At the cost of all else? Do you know?"
• (Goldie Hawn) "No."
• (Bruce Willis) "An idiot. From now on I'm gonna be the kind of idiot I wanna be. An idiot with a modicum of pride, because you know what? I finally realized something. I've lived up to my promise. Till death do us part. Well, you girls are dead. And I'm parting. Cheers."

• (Bruce Willis) "Have you seen her yet?"
• (Meryl Streep) "What a joke. She's not even here."
• (Bruce Willis) "Wait. Look over there."
• (Meryl Streep) "Oh. Looks as though she's lost a few pou-"

• (Bruce Willis) "What are you doing?"
• (Isabella Rossellini) "I'm loving you."

• (Bruce Willis) "You're sitting there, you're talking to me, but you're dead."

• (Bruce Willis) "Where did you put my wife?"
• (Second Doctor) "She's dead, sir. They took her to the morgue."
• (Bruce Willis) "The morgue? She'll be FURIOUS."

Alaina Reed Hall as Psychologist

• (Alaina Reed Hall) "You have got to forget about her. You have got to erase her from your mind. You have to completely eliminate any tra --"
• (Goldie Hawn) "What?"
• (Alaina Reed Hall) "You have to completely eliminate --"
• (Goldie Hawn) "You're right."
• (Alaina Reed Hall) "What?"
• (Goldie Hawn) "You're absolutely right."

Adam Storke as Dakota

• (Adam Storke) "I'm completely alone."
• (Girl at Dakota's) "Dakota --"
• (Adam Storke) "Actually -- Completely isn't quite what I meant."

Michelle Johnson as Anna

• (Michelle Johnson) "I am sorry, but the plasma separation is a very traumatic process to the body. Our policy clearly prohibits more than one in a six-month period."
• (Meryl Streep) "So? It's been nearly that long already."
• (Michelle Johnson) "Miss Ashton, you had one three weeks ago."

• (Michelle Johnson) "Mr.Chagall. I'm sorry, Mr.Chagall. I'm really, really sorry."
• (Ian Ogilvy) "Anna, don't talk, just go away. Leave us alone, I don't want to look at you anymore."
• (Michelle Johnson) "Oh, okay."
• (Ian Ogilvy) "Thank you so much."

• (Michelle Johnson) "How about a nice colagen buff?"
• (Meryl Streep) ""A colagen buff"? You might as well ask me to wash with soap and water."
• (Michelle Johnson) "I could do your make-up myself --"
• (Meryl Streep) "Make-up is POINTLESS. It does nothing anymore. Are you even listening to me? Do you even care? You stand there with your 22-year- old skin and your tits like ROCKS and laugh at me --"

Sydney Pollack as Rose

(We don't have any quotes for this character)

John Ingle as Eulogist

• (John Ingle) "It is my opinion that out beloved Ernest is one man who will, indeed, live forever."
• (Meryl Streep) "Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah --"

Mary Ellen Trainor as Vivian Adams

• (Mary Ellen Trainor) "I never had a chance to thank you for the spectacular job you did with my Aunt Esther."
• (Bruce Willis) "Oh, well, thank you very much."
• (Mary Ellen Trainor) "Her color, her tone. You even brought out her cheekbones."
• (Bruce Willis) "Well, that's my job."
• (Mary Ellen Trainor) "It was almost a shame to bury her."
• (Bruce Willis) "It's so sweet of you to say that."
• (Mary Ellen Trainor) "Can I ask you what your secret is?"
• (Bruce Willis) "Spray paint. You see, you can't just use regular makeup on dead skin. The pores are too dry. You've gotta use a palette and grind the stuff in. One day I'm in the hardware store and I think to myself, "What about mannequin paint?"It's got its own chemical adhesive, comes in an incredible variety of flesh --"
• (Mary Ellen Trainor) "Excuse me."

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