Basil the Rat Quotes

Basil the Rat is a television show that first aired in 1970 . Basil the Rat ended in 1970.

The cast includes: John Cleese as Basil Fawlty, Prunella Scales as Sybil Fawlty, Andrew Sachs as Manuel, John Quarmby as Mr. Carnegie, Ballard Berkeley as Major Gowen, David Neville as Ronald, Brian Hall as Terry, and Connie Booth as Polly.

Basil the Rat Quotes

John Cleese as Basil Fawlty

• (John Cleese) "Do sit down, Mr. Carnegie."
• (Prunella Scales) "He just has, Basil."
• (John Quarmby) "On a plate of veal."
• (John Cleese) "Has it put you off?"
• (John Quarmby) "What?"
• (John Cleese) "Has it put you off the veal, at all?"
• (John Quarmby) "Well, I'm not eating THAT one if THAT'S what you mean."

• (John Cleese) "Can't we get you on Mastermind, Sybil? Next contestant: Mrs. Sybil Fawlty from Torquay. Specialist subject; the bleeding obvious."

• (John Cleese) "Do you need any help, Major?"
• (Ballard Berkeley) "Don't move."
• (Ballard Berkeley) "-- Vermin"
• (John Cleese) "We haven't got any this week, Major."
• (Ballard Berkeley) "Hm?"
• (John Cleese) "No Germans staying this week, Major."

• (John Cleese) "I'll put an ad in the papers: "Wanted, kind home for enormous savage rodent. Answers to the name of Sybil.""

• (John Cleese) "Well, of course it's a rat. You have rats in Spain, don't you; or did Franco have them all shot?"

• (John Cleese) "Sybil, may I introduce the gentleman who's just opened the self-service department here. Mr?"
• (John Quarmby) "Carnegie."
• (John Cleese) "Mr. Carnegie, the scavenger gourmet from?"
• (John Quarmby) "The Public Health department."

• (John Cleese) "Is NOT hamster. Hamsters are small and cuddly. Cuddle this, you'd never play the guitar again."

• (John Cleese) "Manuel -- my wife informs me that you're -- depressed. Let me tell you something. Depression is a very bad thing. It's like a virus. If you don't stamp on it, it spreads throughout the mind, and then one day you wake up in the morning and you -- you can't face life any more."
• (Prunella Scales) "And then you open a hotel."

Brian Hall as Terry

• (Brian Hall) "What the eye don't see, the chef gets away with."

• (Brian Hall) "I HAVEN'T MADE ANY BLEEDIN' RATATOUILLE."

David Neville as Ronald

• (David Neville) "You know something? You're getting my dander up, you grotty little man."

• (David Neville) "Don't shush me."
• (John Cleese) "Well, I'm sorry, but th-th-th-the veal is, in fact, off. Well, it was never really on, quite honestly; that's a misprint."
• (David Neville) "A misprint?"
• (John Cleese) "Yes, it should say um -- eel."
• (David Neville) "Eel Escalope?"

• (David Neville) "Look, I was just trying to give an order to your waiter and he walked away while I was doing it."
• (John Cleese) "Hm?"
• (David Neville) "Well, he wasn't paying attention at all."
• (John Cleese) "I'm so sorry. What were you saying?"
• (David Neville) "The waiter wasn't listening when I was giving him our order. He seemed more interested in my fiancée's legs."
• (John Cleese) "Really? May I?"

Prunella Scales as Sybil Fawlty

• (Prunella Scales) "I'm afraid it's started to rain again."

• (Prunella Scales) "Perhaps it would be simplest to have him put to S-L-E-E-P."
• (John Cleese) "Who? Him or the rat? Might get a discount if we have them both done."
• (Andrew Sachs) "'Spleep'?"

• (Prunella Scales) "They all said, at one time or another, how on Earth did the two of us ever get together. "Black magic," my mother says."
• (John Cleese) "Well, she'd know, wouldn't she? Her and that cat."

John Quarmby as Mr. Carnegie

• (John Quarmby) "The only "gourmets" you'll find scavenging in THIS kitchen will be Kamikaze ones."

• (John Quarmby) "I think these premises do not come up to the standard required by this authority. Unless appropriate steps are taken instantly, I shall have no alternative but to prosecute or recommend closure to the appropriate committee of the council, uh, specifically: The lack of proper cleaning routines, dirty and greasy filters, greasy and encrusted deep fat fryer, dirty, cracked and stained food preparation surfaces, dirty, cracked and missing wall and floor tiles, dirty, marked and stained utensils, dirty and greasy interior surfaces of the ventilator hood --"
• (John Cleese) "Yes, about the deep fat fryer --"
• (John Quarmby) "-- inadequate temperature control and storage of dangerous foodstuffs, storage of cooked and raw meat in same trays, storage of raw meat above confectionery with consequent dripping of meat juices onto cream products, refrigerator seals loose and cracked, ice box undefrosted, and refrigerator overstocked --"
• (John Cleese) "Yes, say no more."
• (John Quarmby) "-- um, food handling routines suspect, evidence of smoking in food preparation area, dirty and grubby food handling overalls, lack of wash hand basin; which you gave us a verbal assurance you'll have installed at our last visit six months ago; and two dead pigeons in the water tank."
• (John Cleese) "Otherwise O.K.?"

Connie Booth as Polly

(We don't have any quotes for this character)

Andrew Sachs as Manuel

• (Andrew Sachs) "Mrs. Fawlty, please understand: If he go, I go."
• (John Cleese) "Well, goodbye."

• (Andrew Sachs) "The Major try to kill Basil."
• (Prunella Scales) "Kill BASIL?"
• (Andrew Sachs) "No, not Mr. Fawlty. I mean Basil, my little --"
• (Connie Booth) "RATATOUILLE."
• (John Quarmby) "Basil the little --"
• (Connie Booth) "Ratatouille. The chef calls the ratatouille 'Basil' because he puts quite a lot of basil in it."
• (Andrew Sachs) "He put Basil in the ratatouille?"
• (Connie Booth) "Yes."
• (Andrew Sachs) "ARGGGHHHHHHHH."
• (Prunella Scales) "He's from Barcelona."

Ballard Berkeley as Major Gowen

• (Ballard Berkeley) "But they spread disease, Fawlty. He was sitting there, on that table. Eating the nuts, if you please."
• (John Cleese) "He's really gone this time --"
• (Ballard Berkeley) "It was like that, about that size."
• (Ballard Berkeley) "That with a tail."
• (John Cleese) "I'm sorry? What did you say it was?"
• (Ballard Berkeley) "Vermin. A dirty rat."

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