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Along Came Polly Quotes

Along Came Polly is a TV show that appeared on TV in 1970 . Along Came Polly ended in 1970.

It features Danny DeVito as producer, Theodore Shapiro (composer) in charge of musical score, and Seamus McGarvey as head of cinematography.

Along Came Polly is recorded in English and originally aired in United States. Each episode of Along Came Polly is 90 minutes long. Along Came Polly is distributed by Universal Studios.

The cast includes: Philip Seymour Hoffman as Sandy Lyle, Ben Stiller as Reuben Feffer, Bob Dishy as Irving Feffer, Hank Azaria as Claude, Jennifer Aniston as Polly Prince, Debra Messing as Lisa Kramer, Alec Baldwin as Stan Indursky, and Masi Oka as Wonsuk.

Along Came Polly Quotes

Masi Oka as Wonsuk

  • (Masi Oka) "Judas is biting me."
  • (Masi Oka) "Judas, you betray me."

Hank Azaria as Claude

  • (Hank Azaria) "Luban. Look me in my eyeball. I treat her like my own flesh and blood."
  • (Hank Azaria) "It's like zee story of zee heeppo."
  • (Ben Stiller) "I'm not familiar with that story."
  • (Hank Azaria) "Zee heeppopotamoose, he is not born saying, "Cool beans. I am a heeppo." No way, Joesay. So he try to paint zee stripe on him to be like zee zebra, but he fool no one. Then he try to put zee spot on zee skin to be like the leopard, but everyboody know he is a heeppo. So, at certain point, he look himself in zee mirror and he just say, "Hey. I am a heeppopotamoose and zere is nothing I can do about it." As soon as he accepts zis, he live life happy. Happy as a heeppo. You understand zis, Luban?"
  • (Ben Stiller) "I'm gonna kill you."
  • (Hank Azaria) "Holy s***, Luban. This is not what it look like."

Ben Stiller as Reuben Feffer

  • (Ben Stiller) "No Lisa, I'm not going to take you back"
  • (Debra Messing) "What, why?"
  • (Ben Stiller) "Well, you screwed a SCUBA instructor on our honeymoon. What kinda cold-hearted bitch will do that to someone they love. I have to be an idiot to take you back."
  • (Ben Stiller) "Oh and by the way, I threw away all your little throw pillows. Yea. Cuz throw pillows suck. They serve no purpose. They're purely decorative."
  • (Ben Stiller) "So you ready?"
  • (Jennifer Aniston) "Let's do it."
  • (Ben Stiller) "You don't know what it was like for me growing up. I had a mother who made me afraid of everything."
  • (Jennifer Aniston) "Well, big deal, Reuben, my dad had a whole second family."
  • (Ben Stiller) "What?"
  • (Jennifer Aniston) "Yeah, on Long Island. He had a wife, and kids, and a golden retriever."
  • (Ben Stiller) "Knock-Knock."
  • (Ben Stiller) "Oh, my God."
  • (Ben Stiller) "You know, they really should tell you if they're gonna just let Komodo dragons run loose around the hotel."
  • (Ben Stiller) "So whose party is this again?"
  • (Philip Seymour Hoffman) "It's an art opening for this Dutch guy, Jost. His art sucks, but he used to sell me really good pot."
  • (Philip Seymour Hoffman) "Oh, man, I'm so friggin' horny."
  • (Ben Stiller) "I, Reuben, take you, Lisa -- I, Reuben, take YOU, Lisa, to be my lawfully wedded wife. I do. I do."
  • (Ben Stiller) "What did you do to her? Did you mess around with her oxygen tanks or something?"
  • (Hank Azaria) "I did nothing, Luban."
  • (Ben Stiller) "My name is not Luban. It is Reuben."
  • (Hank Azaria) "Look, look we had a scuba, we drink some white wine, we talk about life and we cannot help it. It is like love at first sight. She make like the fire in my trouser."
  • (Ben Stiller) "Ahh -- rat in the house."
  • (Jennifer Aniston) "That's not a rat, that's my ferret."

Philip Seymour Hoffman as Sandy Lyle

  • (Philip Seymour Hoffman) "All right, we all need to look into our hearts and go, "Do I think this dude is gonna die in a few years or not?" Is old Leland here gonna fight off a man -- who goes by the last name "Reaper," first name "Grim"? Or will this BASE-jumping, crocodile-wrestling, shark-diving, volcano-luging, bear-fighting, snake-wrangling, motocross-racing bastard die?"
  • (Philip Seymour Hoffman) "Reuben, I'm in a situation here. We have to leave now."
  • (Ben Stiller) "No. Can we stay a couple more minutes?"
  • (Philip Seymour Hoffman) "Dude, no. This is serious. I just sharted."
  • (Ben Stiller) "I don't know what that means."
  • (Philip Seymour Hoffman) "I tried to fart and a little s*** came out. I just sharted. Now let's go."
  • (Ben Stiller) "You're the most disgusting person I've ever met in my life."
  • (Philip Seymour Hoffman) "He's a sexy guy. He's sexy. He's sexually active in his community --"
  • (Philip Seymour Hoffman) "Let it rain."
  • (Philip Seymour Hoffman) "White chocolate."
  • (Philip Seymour Hoffman) "Raindrop."
  • (Cake Decorator) "Hey, aren't you that kid from Crocodile Tears?"
  • (Philip Seymour Hoffman) "That's right. I'm Sandy Lyle."
  • (Cake Decorator) "Man I saw that movie in high school. That bagpipes scene, that was the funniest s***."
  • (Philip Seymour Hoffman) "Yeah, we had a good time on that picture. You want an autograph?"
  • (Cake Decorator) "No, thanks. It's good to see you man. I thought you died like fifteen years ago."
  • (Philip Seymour Hoffman) "No. I'm very much alive, my friend."
  • (Philip Seymour Hoffman) "Raindance."
  • (Philip Seymour Hoffman) "Iceman."

Jennifer Aniston as Polly Prince

  • (Jennifer Aniston) "I've been living my life, okay? I've been in good relationships and I've been in s***ty ones -- and I've moved alot -- and I've been happy, and I've been sad -- and I've been lonely -- and that is what I've been doing. Which is a lot more then I can say for some freak, who thinks he's gonna get the Ebola virus from a bowl of mixed nuts."

Alec Baldwin as Stan Indursky

  • (Alec Baldwin) "Good things."

Bob Dishy as Irving Feffer

  • (Bob Dishy) "It's not about what happened in the past, or what you think might happen in the future. It's about the ride, for Christ's sake. There is no point in going through all this crap, if your are not going to enjoy the ride. And you know what -- when you least expect something great might come along. Something better then you even planned for."

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