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A Very Special Family Guy Freakin' Christmas Quotes

A Very Special Family Guy Freakin' Christmas is a television show that was first aired in 1970 . A Very Special Family Guy Freakin' Christmas stopped airing in 1970.

A Very Special Family Guy Freakin' Christmas Quotes

  • (Peter Griffin) "Merry Christmas to all, and to all, shut the hell up."
  • (Brian Griffin) "Seriously, who buys a novelty fire extinguisher?"
  • (Peter Griffin) "I'll tell you who: someone who cares enough about physical comedy to put his entire family into serious danger, that's who."
  • (Lois Griffin) "Uh, uh, uh, before you sit down, we're due at Joe and Bonnie's for egg nog."
  • (Peter Griffin) "Lois, can't we tell them that your mother died?"
  • (Lois Griffin) "Peter, I'm not going to lie about something like that."
  • (Peter Griffin) "All right, all right, I'll kill your mother. God, when did Christmas become so complicated?"
  • (Peter Griffin) "As we all know, Christmas is that mystical time of year when the ghost of Jesus rises from the grave to feed on the flesh of the living, so we all sing Christmas carols to lull Him back to sleep."
  • (Unnamed) "Outrageous. How dare he say such blasphemy. I've got to do something."
  • (Bob's Friend) "Bob, there's -- nothing you can do."
  • (Unnamed) "Well, I -- guess I'll just have to develop a sense of humor."
  • (Brian) "Sorry Peter, the VCR hasn't worked since you tried to tape Monday Night Football."
  • (Unnamed) "Do you have the expressed written permission of the NFL and ABC?"
  • (Peter Griffin) "Just ABC."
  • (Mall Santa) "Ho ho ho. And what can I bring you?"
  • (Stewie Griffin) "Oh, a peace offering, is it? Very well -- What say you trim those gin-soaked whiskers and bring me some plutonium?"
  • (Mall Santa) "Well, can you be a good boy, hmmm?"
  • (Stewie Griffin) "Your inquiry intrigues me. Can any of us be a 'good boy?' Are our primal urges innate or the result of the choices we make?"
  • (Mall Santa) "OK, wrap it up, kid."
  • (Stewie Griffin) "All right, Kringle, if the reward is plutonium, then your wager is accepted. I will be -- "nice.""
  • (Lois Griffin) "Must -- kill -- star."
  • (Gene Simmons) "Someone kidnapped Santa? That does not rock."
  • (Lois Griffin) "Brian, you're not wearing the sweater I made you."
  • (Brian Griffin) "Uh, we-well, it's a little warm in here, you know?"
  • (Lois Griffin) ""Don we now our gay apparel.""
  • (Brian Griffin) "Doesn't get much gayer than this."
  • (Brian) "You're really gonna take back donated gifts on Christmas Eve?"
  • (Peter Griffin) "Yep. Now here's the plan: you'll enter through the air conditioning duct here. Now, there's an invisible laser grid three inches above the floor, so you'll have to compress your body to the size of an ordinary household sponge and slide underneath like some kind of weird, amphibious dolphin."
  • (Brian) "Can I buy some pot from you?"
  • (Peter Griffin) "Brian, tape this for me."
  • (Brian Griffin) "Oh, sorry. The VCR hasn't worked since you tried to tape Monday Night Football."
  • (FBI Agent) "Do you have the expressed written consent of ABC Sports and the National Football League?"
  • (Peter Griffin) "Just ABC."
  • (Lois Griffin) "So you can cook your own damned turkey, wrap your own damned presents; and while you're at it, you can all ride a one-horse open sleigh to Hell."
  • (Chris Griffin) "I just want peace on Earth. That's better than being selfish like Meg, right? So I should get more than her."
  • (Brian Griffin) "You're really going to take back donated gifts on Christmas Eve?"
  • (Peter Griffin) "Yes, now here's the plan. We'll enter through the air conditioning duct here. Which will be guarded by lasers three inches above the floor, now you'll have to squeeze yourself to the size of about a sponge and then crawl across the floor like a dolphin or some other amphibious mammal."
  • (Brian) "Can I buy some pot from you?"
  • (Peter Griffin) "Hey. I was watching that."
  • (Unnamed) "It'll be on next Christmas."
  • (Peter Griffin) "Who the hell knows when that's gonna be?"

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