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Funny Quotations from Bewitched

"Bewitched" is a sitcom that lasted for eight seasons from 1964 to 1972. The series stars Elizabeth Montgomery, Dick York, Dick Sargent, Agnes Moorehead, and David White. The TV show portrays a witch who marries an ordinary man. The two try to live an regular life but run into some problems along the way, including her meddling mother.

Each episode of "Bewitched" generally begins by Darrin being the victim of a spell as Samantha tries to fix her own problems and cover up the spell.

Below you'll find humorous quotes from the show "Bewitched".


Samantha: He's a dear, sweet, wonderful, perfectly marvelous man.
Endora: Oh, my poor baby. He sounds simply horrible.
Samantha: For a while there, it was kind of hard to tell which witch was which.
Darrin Stephens: You're a what?
Samantha: I'm a witch.
Darrin Stephens: That's wonderful. We'll talk about it tomorrow.
Samantha: Now. I am a witch. A real house-haunting, broom-riding, cauldron-stirring witch.
Darrin Stephens: I'm married to a witch. A real live house-haunting, broom-riding, cauldron-stirring, card-carrying witch.
Doctor Koblin: You came to me for advise. I'll give you some. Now that you've had your honeymoon, why don't you take a vacation?
Endora: How would you like to spend your wedding night with a bull frog?
Darrin Stephens: Sam, don't expect your mother to be gracious. She doesn't do imitations.
Samantha: I'm not a bad witch! I'm a good witch!
Darrin Stephens: Her mother's a bad witch.
Abner Kravitz: Gladys, let's play house. You be the door and I'll shut you.
Samantha: [to her mother] You know, this has been the strangest morning. First Darrin starts asking ridiculous questions and then you pop in like Lady Macbeth doing the neglected mother bit.
Uncle Arthur: [to Endora] When I think of you as a blood relative, I long for a transfusion.
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