Quotations About Games
The number of shots taken by an opponent who is out of sight is equal to the square root of the sum of the number of curses heard plus the number of swishes.
The Art of Coarse Golf, 1975
Golf is a fascinating game. It has taken me nearly forty years to discover that I can't play it.
Golf - My Slice of Life, 1972
You see, you spend a good piece of your life gripping a baseball, and in the end it turns out that it was the other way around all the time.
Ball Four, 1970
Golf, like the measles, should be caught young, for, if postponed to riper years, the results may be serious.
A Mixed Threesome, 1922
This is the second most exciting indoor sport, and the other one shouldn't have spectators.
Hockey belongs to the Cartoon Network, where a person can be pancaked by an ACME anvil, then expanded - accordion-style - back to full stature, without any lasting side effect.
Does college pay? They do if you are a good open-field runner.
Baseball players are smarter than football players. How often do you see a baseball team penalized for too many men on the field?
Once the game is over, the king and the pawn go back in the same box.