Quotations About Games
The number of shots taken by an opponent who is out of sight is equal to the square root of the sum of the number of curses heard plus the number of swishes.
The Art of Coarse Golf, 1975
Golf is a fascinating game. It has taken me nearly forty years to discover that I can't play it.
Golf - My Slice of Life, 1972
You see, you spend a good piece of your life gripping a baseball, and in the end it turns out that it was the other way around all the time.
Ball Four, 1970
Golf, like the measles, should be caught young, for, if postponed to riper years, the results may be serious.
A Mixed Threesome, 1922
If you meet the Buddha in the lane, feed him the ball.
How would you like a job where, every time you make a mistake, a big red light goes on and 18,000 people boo?
If a man watches three football games in a row, he should be declared legally dead.
I went to a fight the other night and a hockey game broke out.
A bad day of fishing is better than a good day of work.
If a woman has to choose between catching a fly ball and saving an infant's life, she will choose to save the infant's life without even considering if there are men on base.