Poetry
Quotes
Bad Santa Quotes
I saw you at another mall.
Willie:
Well, I'm happy for you.
Watching Boy:
If you really are Santa, you could do magic.
Willie: [whispers]
Wanna see some magic? OK, let's watch you disappear!
[shoves him away]
Gin:
Sweet Jews for Jesus!
Kid:
It's a wooden pickle.
Bob Chipeska:
I just can't help it. There's something about the guy that makes me uneasy.
Marcus:
Oh, my. What a darling photo. Are you certain you only want this single? Additional photos come in handy as gifts for grandma and grandpa, or as a wonderful remembrance for friends.
[photo of Santa looking down and young girl looking away]
Milwaukee Mom with Photo:
Gee, you know what? This one, I think it's more than enough. Thanks. Merry Christmas...
Gin: [after seeing a kid has placed a game in his pants]
What's this?
Shoplifter:
I was going to pay for it.
Gin:
Wrong answer.
Kid:
OW... OW... OW... I cut my hand, by mistake OW... OW... OW...
Kid:
Your beard's not real.
Willie:
No Shit!It was real, but I got sick and all the hair fell out.
Kid:
How come?
Willie:
I loved a woman who wasn't clean.
Kid:
Mrs. Santa?
Willie:
No it was her sister.
Kid:
Candy corn?
Willie:
Well they all can't be winners!
Christmas Movie Quotes
Christmas VacationElf
Four Christmases
Fred Claus
Frosty the Snowman
More movie quotes
