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Would You Listen?

The rust is flaking the metal
and this pipe dream is falling apart.

The tar is lining your lungs
and this hope for a smile is fading fast.

I'm in fear of losing
but I guess I've already lost.
Your idle hands and your idle engine
stretch for another hit
just a little more nicotine
just a little more tetrahydrocannabinol.

And as I lay my head on your bare chest
the sound of your lungs struggling for air
and the shadows of what is to come...
I can't even stay.

I'm at a loss for what you're missing.

by thefadingscene
posted on 04/12/2009

Vote: Vote upVote down
Comments: 7
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Comment by SecretsLie: Apr 21, 2009 5:24 pm
this is really well explained
it too makes me sad
Comment by stormofwings: Apr 12, 2009 6:59 pm
Wow that is really really good

Love it and can relate to it alot.

Keep it up xOx
Comment by TearRains: Apr 14, 2009 1:19 pm
it makes me ad... it makes me wanna curl up and attempt to think happy thoughts.... you did a really good job
Comment by solonely: Apr 21, 2009 7:04 pm
I liked the way you put the poem very good.
Comment by ReverberatingSilence: May 7, 2009 10:11 pm
Alrighty, So I Like, Like, Like,
The obvious struggle with addiction
for Ms. Jane,
'cause i'm also fighting this situation,
What can I say MJ's Sashay is
utterly iresistible to some,

On a side note, You're emotional turmoil(situation) is quite devastating and makes for a great piece of literature,
Comment by SilentWords: May 8, 2009 8:08 am
Mj is not addtictive, its proven. you can stop when ever you want! you just have to want to!

anyways on a lighter note, this was a very well written poem.-super job!
Comment by thefadingscene: May 12, 2009 6:05 pm
MJ is not physically addicting but it can be emotionally addicting...
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