Never

Have you ever wanted to listen
To drown out your own sounds?
I did, today.
But I skipped every song I have

And even those I thought I wanted
Didn't really fit
I let some tears fall this morning
And I wish the rest would come

But only sometimes
Like when I run from your cheery calls
I remember those too, you know
But that might be a little thing
Of which, I care too much

Always have.

So I listened to the cd in the green case
The one with the flower on the top
And I'm sure I'll feel hollow in the words now

But I know one day it'll stop

And I won't call out, "Liar"
When I don't feel this way
My growth will come along soon
Just like it has today

And maybe, it's also changed my music taste

I don't blame you.
And though I can't forgive now
It's due to how much I cannot grasp from my past
In this instant

But instances change.
And who am I to refute the fact that I, Adam James, truly loved you once?
I loved you once.
In a seemingly fairytale fashion
In a way you relayed to me with the same ferocity

But today
That is who we can't be.
And why would we?

I will always hold what I loved close
Though now it's so messy
Just know you are in my heart
And it will never falter.

Tonight I am the person I wish to be.
I am at my best.
It's been hours into writing this
And I now hope you see
Just a little more of me.

by Atwood
posted on 11/03/2009