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#58

i want to tell you a little secret
sweetie
so come here
under my wing
and lean in close
take the time
to understand
instead of shrinking into nothing
but self pity
people
friends
i
dont enjoy being torn down
when you have a bad day
i dont enjoy
being
poked
and proded at
and crticized over every little thing
in case you havent noticed
i have trust issues
and no time to "make friends"
or put up with nonsense
i have enough stress.
if you cause stress to me,
my dear,
you will be disposed of.
why would i want a friend
who makes me hate myself
and makes me hate the things i love to do?
so to conclude this
treat me the way you want to be treated.
i dont go out of my way
to tell you that you played horribly
or to bitch at you because you lost a football game.
dont go out of your way to tell me
its my fault you lost
darling, im a cheerleader.
we dont hurdle ourselves onto the field
we stand there
and cheer you on
and support you, whether you win or lose
so be my personal cheerleader for once
cheer me on
and support me
instead of using me as a means of making YOU feel better
friendships are a two way road,
you know.

by oceanreverie
posted on 10/18/2009

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Comments: 3
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Comment by BurningDesire129: Oct 18, 2009 6:36 pm

Very deep adessa ... don't worry I don't think different of u ... but very good and sort if amazingly written ... lengthy and emotion filled ... Good Job

Comment by caldera: Oct 21, 2009 7:43 pm

i didnt intend to hurt you, but i know it means jack shit as of now. i guess one of your greatest features is honesty. dont think im not taking it to heart. i dont care about wilson anymore, theres always week 12 to deal with them again. ever since saturday ive been physically and emotionally feeling the blow that i basically self inflicted. I'm a stupid football guy. That doesnt think before i open my mouth. or before i act. and every time i see you now i literally smack myself in the head once im out of view from you. not only have i taken advantage and squandered our friendship which i probably dont deserve anymore, or even deserved in the first place
i used you as a crutch.
when i could have easily walked on my own
for that, im sorry the most for.
If we decide to put this past us, as we have other feuds and quarrels. This being the last of them. I wont use you to limp through my life. I'll use your acting, singing, dancing, cheerleading and piano playing to bring joy to my life. cuz being friends with you is, or was, something i was truly proud and fortunate to have. if you forgive me, ill treasure your friendship more than anyones i have. and if not, well then ill just have to prevent making the same mistakes again. I can't afford to lose another friendship like yours. You know I love and care about you. I've said it countless times, but need to do a better job showing it. And you know how broken I am over it. Even if its my fault. I look at myself and go stupid stupid stupid. And I am. I'm a fool, and i know you have too many of them in your life. When I stop acting like a fool, when you decide and make the judgment that I'm no longer a fool, I'd love to have our beautiful friendship back.

Comment by caldera: Oct 21, 2009 7:46 pm

And, for what its worth, id like to revise those words i texted.
"Those officials were terrible, but we could've done better anyway. But you guys did great as usual.=)"

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