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Funny Quotes From Semi-Pro - Page 2

Jackie Moon: Everybody panic! Oh my God, there's a bear loose in the coliseum! There will be no refunds! Your refund will be escaping this deathtrap with your life! If you have a small child, use it as a shield! They love the tender meat! Cover your sodas! Dewie loves sugar!
Jackie Moon: Nothing in the rulebook that says you can't play drunk.
Dick Pepperfield: Well actually there is.
Jackie Moon: If you see an opossum, kill it. It's not a pet.
Jackie Moon: No refunds, consider your refund escaping this death trap with your lives!
Dick Pepperfield: Jackie's teammates doing just an awful job of stabilizing his spine off the court.
Lou Redwood: You calling me a jive turkey?
Jackie Moon: I'm so excited I can't feel my arms!
Lou Redwood: Jackie Moon is Flint's favorite son. And he has done more for this city than any human being who's ever lived on this planet!
Dick Pepperfield: With the possible exception of eh, Henry Ford... Jackie Moon has done a lot for this city, you're right about that.
Father Pat the Ref: Corndogs, Jackie! Corndogs, for all these people!
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More Will Ferrell movie quotations:
Step Brothers
Blades of Glory