Poetry
Quotes
Late Night Quotes
I'm sensitive in the eyeball. Does that line work with the ladies?
Conan O'Brien
I always wondered what would happen if you blow-dried the "Weakest Link" chick and cut off her nuts.
Triumph the Insult Comic Dog, on Simon Cowell
Consider yourself fisted by freedom!
Lips of Donald Rumsfeld
I'm 6'4" and I have the voice of a nine-year old.
Conan O'Brien
That is how they talk in England!Where's Chitty Chitty Bang Bang, gov'nor?
Conan O'Brien
My name is Bill Clinton, and I'm reporting for booty.
Lips of Bill Clinton
This just in from CBS News - the Earth has hurtled into the sun.
Lips of Dan Rather
Where are you going, LaBamba? You don't have a home.
Conan O'Brien, after LaBamba got up and walked out
I'm-a gonna go to hell when I die. I'm-a gonna go to hell when I die.
Conan O'Brien
Never piss off a hawk with a blow gun.
Conan O'Brien
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