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Funny Quotes From The Daily Show with Jon Stewart

The Daily Show with Jon Stewart is one of the most beloved shows on television by the younger generation. No politician or news broadcaster is safe from Stewart's wit, unless he likes them, of course. Then he is a bit of a softball thrower. He has been known to be a bit soft on fellows he enjoys. John McCain, for example, would almost always receive very little criticism when he went on the show.

Stewart might be the brains of the show, but there are still many humorous people around him. The following are some funny quotes from the comedy show.

You may also enjoy Colbert Report quotes

Director: Chuck O'Neil
Creators: Madeleine Smithberg and Lizz Winstead
Original run: July 22, 1996 - Present


The Daily Show with Jon Stewart. We're getting a helicopter... soon.
Announcer
Guy with chin-stud and... top-of-nose thing, I think I'll miss you most of all.
Jon Stewart
France, c'mon girl, don't be an invader hater.
Jon Stewart
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It's as though there's only two positions you can have - you're either for the war or against the troops.
Jon Stewart
Before we bring democracy to Iraq or even Afghanistan, it might be prudent to bring it to Florida. We don't have to bring regime change to the whole state. We can start in Pensacola and work our way down.
Jon Stewart
If you're a lesbian, why are you turning me on?
Stephen Colbert
point? All right, no, no, no, I kid, I kid. Cable's great, Jon Stewart, and you're great, and you have a great show... for me to poop on. I mean come on, having a show on cable, it's not like it's real, it's like sniffing your sister's ass.
Stephen Colbert
The judgment marks a key victory for the recording industry, in its aggressive battle against poor high school students and fun.
Jon Stewart, on the lawsuit against Napster
This is what happens when you take away Napster.
Jon Stewart, on the increase in college crime rates
Values like burning as much gas as you can so you can drive around an oval for hours.
Jon Stewart, on President Bush's speech about NASCAR promoting values