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40 Year Old Virgin Quotes

She had hands as big as Andre the Giant, and she had an Adam's apple as big as her balls.
Andy

Trish: Do you have protection?
Andy: I don't believe in guns.

Really? All your girlfriends wanted to have sex with virgins too? That's funny... I didn't even know you g-girls talked like that. I think my first time might be your best time too. Well I knew it, you know what? I knew that you'd react that way and I knew that you would want to lead me through my first sexual encounter will all the compassion and care that someone would give to their soulmate.
Andy

Know how I knew you were gay? You like Coldplay.
David

If she starts waxing his pubes, I'm outta here.
Cal

Do you know how I know you're gay? Because you are holding each other ever so gently.
Haziz

He sold his old toys for over half a million dollars! We gotta get some toys!
Jay

I touched a guy's balls once in Hebrew School.
Cal

Keep your bitch on a leash.
Andy

From now on, your dick is my dick. I'm gonna get you laid.
Jay

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