Advice on How to Break Up With Your Boyfriend or Girlfriend
Breaking up can be one of the hardest decisions one can ever make. However, in more times than not, we find we are with a jerk who just needs to be gotten rid of.
Many of us have problems with this. Be it not being able to tell your boyfriend/girlfriend due to being afraid of the consequences or because they were truly great, just isn't 'the one.'
Depending on the circumstances, there are certain rules which should be in place.
Break Up Rules
- Do not avoid the subject. It's best to get it over with as soon as possible. The longer you wait the harder it will get.
- Remain calm. You don't want to stir up mixed emotions or send mixed signals. It could only make it worse.
- Talk about it. It's always best to state your opinion on why you want to break up. This is so your 'someone' (soon to be ex.) will not question it and think there may still be something between you. Try not to blame each other, it only makes things worse and may cause aggressiveness.
- It's always best to do it in person, unless of course this person is abusive by any means. Then it's best to either call or write a letter, even better, have a friend tell the person. It's a horrible way to break up, but if it's a last resort, do it.
- After the break up, do not go back -- no matter what. You broke up for a reason, remember it. You might think this person has changed, but they truly haven't. People do not change over short periods - no matter how convincing that person might be.
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Breaking Up With a Guy
Men are generally harder to break up with than females. They can be aggressive, emotionally abusive (well, so can women, but moving on), or they may simply break down and cry. For those reasons, here are some guidelines you should follow when breaking up with a man.
- Keep it simple. The more he understands about the break up the easier it'll be for the both of you.
- Keep it short. The faster you get it over with the better and the longer you are together the worse.
- Leave no "maybes." Don't make him think there's a possibility of getting back together or else he may never leave you alone and just get even more the jealous when you meet someone new.
- Tell him in person. If possible, tell him in person. It'll be easier on the both of you. However, if there is abuse in the relationship, seek a friend to tell him for you or write a letter.
- Stay calm. If you are calm, he will be calm.
Breaking up with guy is as hard as you want it to be. The quicker you get it over with the better, there is no use in waiting unless there is a 50% chance of changing your mind. Just keep the break up easy to understand and speak calmly and everything will be fine. Don't take short cuts!
Of course, there are always exceptions to rules. One may be able to go back to someone they were with, if the reason is not a big one. For example, distance. If two broke up because of distance, it would be easy for them to get back together later on without any serious problems - same thing holds true for misunderstandings.